


Mr. Hodek and His Little Minion

by skyesu_arts



Category: Creepypasta - Fandom, Jeff the killer - Fandom
Genre: Creepypasta, Cult, Fanfiction, Gay, Horror, Jeff the Killer - Freeform, LGBT, LGBTQ, M/M, Mask, Masquerade, OC, Original Character - Freeform, Original Creepypasta, Pride, Romance, Serial Killer, Violence, jeffrey hodek, sesseur
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-29
Updated: 2019-09-11
Packaged: 2019-10-18 14:14:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 50
Words: 87,736
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17582432
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/skyesu_arts/pseuds/skyesu_arts
Summary: (Jeff the Killer)"I'm sorry it had to end this way," he usually said. Of course, he meant it. Who could go through with taking an innocent life, and not feel some kind of remorse?Apparently, more people than Maximus Ryong had expected.Especially a deranged man with a scarred face and a permanent smile, who had his own way of doing things.(MLM)





	1. Chapter 1

You know, not as many people in the world call me “sir” as I’d expect. Far less than I’m comfortable with, to tell the truth. That’s why I never really turned away the one who did like I thought I would.

It was nighttime. Of course. It’s _always_ nighttime with these things. But I have to tell you, a lot of stuff happens at night. So much so that it’s way too tempting to crawl out of my hideaway every time the sun goes down just to see what’ll take place. But I can’t do that. So every now and then I’ll give myself a little treat, and by now you should know what comes with that. Bloodshed and trouble.

I was walking down the street trying to make myself as small as possible because we can’t afford to be spotted. Not with our knives out, anyway. And right when I reach the corner and I think I’m alone, I saw a little something coming my way. Seemed like they didn’t know if I was really there or not, otherwise they’d have gone running wild in the other direction.

So they continued towards me.

And I continued towards them.

And when we reached each other I already had the blade out, just in case, but then I realized I had nothing to worry about because it was just some helpless young woman out for a stroll. Now, I had plenty of questions to ask on their own. But I didn’t exactly get a chance to talk immediately because she goes _off_.

“Y-you’re Jeffrey Woods. Please don’t hurt me, I didn’t mean to...I mean, I’ll just get out of your way and I won’t tell anyone.”

“Listen, I think you’re—”

“Please. I don’t want to die. I’ll keep my mouth shut, I swear!”

“Sweetheart, I’m not who you think I am.”

“You...you’re not?” Her mouth formed a quivering, hopeful smile at that, and I showed her my teeth as I drew my knife into the air.

“Yeah. I’m Jeff _Hodek_ , darling. And you might wanna set a more realistic goal for yourself than not dying tonight, because I can assure you I don’t just let people _get out of my way_.”

Her smile slowly faded as she realized exactly what was happening. She held her arms up against her face, shaking.

“I-I’ve never heard of a Jeff Hodek! I’m begging you, don’t kill me, I won’t say anything to anyone! I can give you money, if that’s what you want, but don’t—”

“Oh, you’re going to have to be more convincing than _that_ ,” I growled, stepping closer and looming over her cowering form.

“I can kill someone else _for_ you!”

“Tempting, but no.”

“I…I can be your girlfriend!”

I froze.

_What._

“…girlfriend,” I repeated incredulously, just to make sure that was what she had said.

“Y-yeah! Or slave, if you prefer. I’ll do whatever you want, anything! Just please…let me live. I won’t do anything to contradict you.” I could hear the desperation in her voice; she was definitely frightened of what I might do. But for all I knew, she could’ve really also been one of those freaky people who were in love with who they _thought_ I was. I almost laughed.

“Alright. You’ve got something going for yourself. By all means, keep talking. What exactly are you planning to do as my _partner,_ miss?” I bowed down with my hands behind my back until our faces were at level. For a moment, she lowered her arms and I saw tears just barely escaping her eyes and rolling down her cheeks. Her mouth was agape, and her face was entirely flushed red. It took all my willpower not to chuckle as she tried to come up with something of substance to say.

“I…um, I could…I’ll make you food? I can hold things up if you’re away doing whatever it is you do…? Just, uh, regular housewife stuff, I guess, and, you know…” she trailed off, like she was too shy to say the last thing I knew was on her mind.

“Sex,” I finished for her, raising an eyebrow.

“Wh-what?! You…I don’t…!” Her face went even redder, if you could imagine. I finally managed to laugh.

“Oh, man. You know, you _are_ one cute little thing. So funny…”

While she was caught off guard, I leaned closer to her and brought the knife up to her back. I smirked as she grew more terrified and confused than before.

“…that you think any of that could _ever_ happen.”

I plunged it through her ribcage and into her heart from behind, saving the usual excessive gore for another night. Before she could collapse on me, I caught her by the waist and quickly sliced a smile onto her face, licking the blood off one side of the blade.

“There. Now you’re more my type.”

I tucked it away again and dropped the body on the ground, walking off to some other town that wouldn’t cause me as much trouble. I silently cursed that girl out for wasting my one kill of this area before I got caught again; I was in no shape for a spree so I couldn’t make the most of tonight and _then_ pack my things. Besides, it was almost morning. This little idiot’s death would be on every news station in the state in a couple of hours, and I had to get out of here now.

So I just kept walking until I was out of town.

_I get no real respect_ , I thought.

I could leave my old hideout behind, of course. I didn’t even make it; some old little shack in the middle of a garbage dump had been waiting for me here for what seemed like a long time. It always bothered my skin, all the dust floating around. Not to mention the _smell._ Fuck no. I happily left it behind, and I didn’t have any important belongings there anyway. I always carried my knife and the photo in my pockets whenever I could, especially going out in the open.

But this new town felt strange. Like that one phrase you’d hear all the time in old western movies; _There’s only enough room for one sheriff here._ And something told me there was already a “sheriff” taking care of things in this establishment.

Or at least, there was going to be.

I quickly retreated to a nearby forest at sunrise and, by some miracle, found a small trapdoor in a remote clearing that led to a charming little underground home. Granted, it was filthy and, again, seemed like it hadn’t been used in ages. There was dirt and cobwebs everywhere, and I think some dried blood in a corner somewhere. But I was content being a mole man for a while if it meant safety, and the place even had a little kitchen.

I decided to hold camp for a couple of days and see what I could do with my new home before I wasted another solace. Surprisingly, keeping up the place was so distracting that I actually felt as if I could wait some more to go out and kill. There was too much to do; I hadn’t lived somewhere like this in a long time. I was able to test out my cooking skills recovered from college days, and semi-effectively heal any past wounds I’d neglected for the sake of survival and adaptability. And there were a _lot_ of those.

But even will all that, it would only be a matter of time before I ran into conflict.

I had spent weeks, months inside my little hideout and therefore failed to notice that a certain someone else was already occupying these woods. The first time I encountered her, I was able to tell exactly what I had gotten myself into, because that bitch _Natalie_ unloaded an entire tank of tear gas into my side of the forest. Hurt like hell, especially when it got directly in my eyes. I knew that if that whole thing with the acid hadn’t happened all those years ago, I wouldn’t be that bothered by it. But I have scars here, there, and everywhere on my face and I can’t even wash myself without feeling like I’m on fire. So I’d just stay inside, never going up unless I really needed to and my face was covered.

I swear, if he hadn’t just left me to fend for myself, I might’ve become a better person. Might’ve even stopped the whole killing thing. This was all on _him_ , I knew it. But you can’t reverse the past, you know? Gotta move forward.

Looks like I wasn’t the only one who needed to learn that.


	2. Chapter 2

[MASQ]

I approached the front door and scratched my arm, trying to decide what method to use in terms of getting inside. According to a soggy newspaper I'd picked up off the ground, this town's death rate was almost tripled compared to the surrounding establishments. Which would be a slight advantage on my part; suspicion wouldn't be very high if someone died in their "sleep" tonight. But on the other hand, more doors might be locked.

_ Maybe play it safe. _

I rolled out some twine and tugged harshly for reference. I wouldn't be able to scale a 15-foot wall with it. I had to break a window, or at least a screen. The breaking part was easy; I just rammed my pliers through and ripped it to create a decent opening. I studied the window frame, and almost sighed in relief when I found there was a pivoting latch.

Once inside, I removed my shoes and stepped lightly near the walls. The floorboards creaked. Loudly.

_ Shit. _

I held my breath, feeling tension hanging thickly in the air. It seemed like someone was awake too.  _ Oh, _ I thought disappointedly. This could have went smoothly. Now I  _ really  _ had to work. I managed to locate some stairs, and crept on my hands and feet up to the nearest door. It was wide open.

_ Something's not right. _

I wasn't more than a foot into the room when I saw a tall, shadowed man looming over what must have been a sleeping couple. I reached behind my back to grab my pliers, staying rooted to my spot.

Something seemed to click in the man's brain, because suddenly he was staring at me, and I could make out a grotesque, unnatural smile on his face. I sighed; now I needed to ask the questions.

"Who are you?" I started with in a hushed tone. This seemed like the most simple one.  _ He should have no trouble answering it. _

Except it seems he  _ was _ having a little trouble, because he didn’t say anything for a good minute. I sighed.

"Tell me who you are," I said a little louder.

He responded this time. Quietly. I didn't catch anything significant, only, “you should know.” Raising my eyebrows, I took a step forward. If this man had business with  _ them, _ I would have to stick around.

_ Maybe this is where it all finally ends. _

When I didn't say anything in return, he laughed softly. Something glimmered at his side, and I noticed the faint outline of a blade in his hand. But not just that; there a dark crimson hue on the edge that seemed to slowly drip to the floor.

_ Those people aren't sleeping. They're dead. _

Something bubbled in my stomach, and my armed hand dropped to my side. This happened every time I was seen. I wished just one time it didn't have to be like this.

I sighed apologetically. "Well, in any case, I can't let you see me, let alone get away when you already have. I’m sorry," I said somberly. Taking another step forward, I took the string around my belt and tightened it between my free fingers.

"I'm sure you're a great person," I added, forcing an apologetic smile.

"Go to sleep.”

"Excuse me?" I paused. Something in his tone had changed. His voice was hoarse and threatening.

"Go to sleep," he repeated, still quiet, and he moved faster than I expected as he attempted to pin my throat against a nearby wall.

Attempted.

I dodged and caught his throat with the twine.  _ That was a little stupid of both of us, _ I thought, disappointed.  _ I shouldn't underestimate another supposed killer, but he shouldn't be so rude about doing things. _

It turns out he wasn't entirely stupid, because as I prepared to lodge the pliers in his upper back, he quickly reached up and sliced my hand at the wrist.

I covered my mouth before I yelled, releasing him from my hold.  _ This is a first _ . Some people fought back, obviously. It always pained me when they did. But this could go on for a good amount of time if I didn't end it now.

"Alright," I breathed, wringing my hand to lessen the pain. "It's…it's obvious that neither of us are going to win easily. Maybe we could just…talk things out, and—”

"Talk things out?" he interrupted with a laugh. "You shouldn't be  _ alive _ right now. I honest to god do not give a shit about who you are or how strong you might be. You are going to have a nice little rest, and I can go about my business with these  _ tools. _ " He gestured sharply at the two corpses in bed, and I narrowed my eyes.

_ This complicates things. _

I sighed and held my hands out in front of me. "I don't think you really understand the situation here," I attempted weakly. "You see, I…well, I kill people. You probably do the same, right?"

"I don't care what you do, you're in my  _ way _ ," he grunted, making to stab my shoulder. I quickly stepped aside and grabbed his arm. "Please, let me talk—”

"I vote to let you scream."

"We both could have someone on our  _ side!" _ I nearly yelled out of frustration. Without a second thought, I reached for a lamp pole I spotted in the corner of the room and swung it against his chest, effectively pinning him in place onto a dresser. He coughed and gripped the pole as well, trying to push it back. I dug my nails into his hand, persuading him to let go. He winced and released it, like my touch had burned him.

“Can I speak  _ now? _ ” I said, aggravated, my face inching closer to his.

“You little shit. Do you even know what’s going on here? Do you know how much I had to risk just to have this one night? Scratch that, do you know  _ me? _ ”

“I am trying my best to end this civilly! Whatever policy you have, there must be some exceptions. Are you aware of how many times I’ve ignored my better judgement and killed innocent people before? Are you saying you’d rather me end you now than let you ‘go about your business’? We never have to speak of this again. We can both just leave this place and forget everything, but you have to  _ work  _ with me here! Do you understand,  _ sir? _ ” I pushed the pole further up until it was against his neck, and he gritted his teeth.

“How da—”

"Do you understand?!”

He seemed to pause for a second, then pierced me with a glare. "The day I negotiate with a fucking  _ child _ is the day I die." With one last push, he managed to throw me off of him and grab me by the neck before I could do much else. Even if I wanted to struggle, I couldn't. He coughed again, rubbing his throat.

"Now, here’s a deal of my own, friend. You'll leave this town if you know what's good for you. I'm giving you one chance to get out of my sight. If I  _ ever _ see you again, you know what'll happen." He released me and gestured politely towards the door.

He must have known the rules even better than I did.

I saw myself out of the house quietly, and examined my hand as I moved towards the small forest at the edge of town. In the little light the moon provided, I could only make out a dark liquid seeping out in the crook between my palm and wrist. I squeezed the fabric of my shirt to the cut, the stinging sensation making me wince.

_ So, that's how people like us interact? _

I could have sworn that encounter could have been just a  _ little _ bit more cooperative.  _ Some compromise couldn't hurt; we're all struggling here. _ I sighed and ducked into a narrow, twisted path between trees. The leaves crunched satisfactorily beneath my feet. Morning wouldn't come for a good bit of time, it was nearing the end of fall.  _ More night, more darkness, more sleep,  _ I thought hopefully.  _ Or really, a bit more  _ eternal  _ sleep. _

Eventually, my mind drifted to the inevitable.

"I miss you," I muttered aloud. As if any of them could hear me.

_ "We miss you too, our little Masquerade. You've come so far, and you finally found us! Everyone is alive and well. We can take care of you again!" _

What an amazing turnout that would be, to have all my worries finally be put at ease. I sighed at the words I wished I could hear sometime soon, and walked further down the "trail." Only an idiot would follow a wide path.

A small twig sticking out from a tree caught my sleeve, scraping the cut. I lurched forward, holding my wrist again. " _ Fuck, _ " I hissed under my breath. For just a moment, I uncovered the wound to look at it. The cracks of my palms were practically black. My wrist looked mutilated and messy.  _ I thought applying pressure was supposed to stop the bleeding. _

Before I could go any further away from the failed town, I heard a surprisingly loud sound far behind me. It was almost like someone had smashed glass with a hammer. I didn't bother turning around, and apparently I didn't need to. About 20 feet away, I caught the man of the hour sprinting past me almost panicked, armed with a serrated knife and hands most likely drenched in blood.

_ What was he even doing when I left? _

As his silhouette got smaller and the sound of his feet snapping branches and crushing leaves grew fainter, I couldn't help but narrow my eyes.

For the last five years, I haven't so much as had a 5-minute conversation with anybody. I hadn't started planning out what I was going to say to them once I found them. Talking to myself, and mostly non-negotiable insomniac victims was the only way I stayed sane. Or at least, as sane as I could afford.

Screw the old rules. New plan: Once I find someone to talk to, I stick with them.

Effective meeting Mr. Hodek.


	3. Chapter 3

[JEFF]

I’d decided to give into the itching and spend my killing spree on that one night. I figured whoever was sent to investigate would assume that I fled out of state when really, I would just crawl back into my little hole and wait the scene out. I knew that death was more common here; god knows why, but I saw the obvious advantage. Not sure whether I should have waited just one more night. Hell, one more  _ hour _ would have done the trick and I’d never have met that “Masquerade” creep. He’s delusional, even more than I was five years ago. It’d be hilarious if he wasn’t such a sad little thing.

Anyways, my round was going pretty good. Got some asshole that said something like “long hair is for girls and faggots” before I gladly skewered him. Like to think I did his wife a favor, if that was even who was sleeping next to him. No joke, she didn’t even look like she was alive, and she didn’t stir, so  _ I  _ didn’t bother. But there were a few people in this little town that actually seemed decent. This kid, I remembered, was cuddling (with admirable dedication) a huge plastic Transformers figure in his sleep. He looked so happy and peaceful. It almost reminded me of…well, you know.

So, yeah. I skipped that house.

I broke into this one place that was decorated to no end, looked like somebody’s birthday had just passed. Except it also looked like these people weren’t that comfortable with  _ using _ the word “birthday,” because I passed this huge banner that had that word crossed out and instead up above it was written “anniversary.” And  _ that _ was crossed out too, and squeezed into a corner I saw the words “happy day-on-which-you-were-born!”

I almost chuckled, wondering what could have happened to drive them to do that. I skipped that one, too. Only really shitty people deserve to die on their “not-birthday,” if you will.

[MASQ]

Honestly, I can barely believe that I came into possession of his name by asking to his face instead of looking somewhere else. His face is plastered all over the media, his story’s been told everywhere. There might not have been a single person in the country, even the  _ world _ who hasn't seen some variation of Jeff Hodek; the infamous serial killer, whose moniker reeks urban legend.

Yeah. The world. And then there's me.

For most of my life, I didn't have access to news outlets, internet, anything. What little time I  _ did _ get online was spent searching various names of people I knew. So, yeah. In terms of people like him, I was bound to be a little oblivious.

Maybe I followed him  _ because _ I didn't know him. Maybe it was because he could have answers to  _ something. _

Maybe I was just being stupid.

As I strode closer and closer to the center of the forest, thoughts in my head raced, screeched to a stop, and clashed with each other to form some sort of amalgam nightmare. Most of it was the growing doubt in the back of my mind, telling me that this was a bad idea. And most of  _ that _ had to do with the fact that I already had a plan.

_ You're giving up on them, _ something told me.

I almost walked into a branch, and stubbed my toe on a sharp rock jutting out from beneath a root. I kept walking, at a more steady pace.

_ You don't even know where you're going. _

I swallowed down the urge to even  _ think _ of the obvious rebuttal to that. Every time I did, my throat contracted and my stomach tied itself in a knot. I'd rather not subject myself to that kind of pain.

My hand was growing numb from being clenched in a fist, and I upturned the bleeding portion of my wrist to stop it from dripping straight to the ground. As my pace slowed, I fiddled with some twine with my good hand. I felt a tug at the small of my back, and realized that my pliers were slipping loose. I sighed and ripped them from my beltline, deciding to carry them myself. My eyelids were sagging, and before I could close them completely, a burning scent jerked me awake.

Without thinking, I ducked behind a tree and pressed my mask to my face firmly with two fingers. There was a tingling, stinging sensation under my nose. My eyes started watering, and I tucked my head into my knees.  _ Acid. Or tear gas, _ I immediately guessed.

_ Well played, sir. _

Careful not to expose my face, I slowly raised my pliers and snipped at a clean sleeve, ripping a good chunk off. Narrowing my eyes, I held the fabric to my nose and mouth and turned forward to face the rest of the forest. There was a yellow-orangish tint to the scenery now, and I knew for a fact that it wasn't daylight.

I had to almost squeeze my eyes shut to stop them from leaking. As I walked further into the stinging, humid air, I couldn't tell if my face was numb or being pricked with dozens of tiny needles. All I could do was search for some sort of shelter. Operation: hunt down possible madman ally was being put to a hold.

_ No wonder nobody's been able to catch him before. He's living in the middle of a virtual forest fire. _

Twine was still weaved between my fingers, digging into my skin. My other hand was too busy keeping the cloth held to my face. I slowly began sidestepping to the left as I progressed, hoping for some sort of relief from the burning cloud.

About 20 yards further along, I almost tripped over a strangely flat surface. My feet had barely tapped it, and it somehow made a clunking sound that broke the recent silence. I looked down, my eyes watering at an ungodly capacity, at a wooden platform. A small, elongated nick was carved into the side, and latches were visible at the other.

Bullseye.

_ Yes. He's going to be a good person to have around. _

Out of desperation to get out of the painful cloud, I dug my hand under the small crack and yanked with my remaining energy. A painfully loud crack echoed, and I felt something snap below my grip. Broken or not, it had opened. Somewhat.

I wasted no time in climbing down. It was almost pitch black past the first inch, and when my foot lightly grazed the edge of the tunnel, I couldn't feel any kind of step or grip anywhere. I resorted to some kind of old-fashioned rock climbing stance; I held on to the upper ground while trying to secure my feet against the wall.

Eventually, I got to a point where I was at the full extent of my height, and I still couldn't find anything to stand on. Sighing, and heart beating rapidly, I inched my fingers off slowly. No luck.

I dropped down.

I had fallen about 7 feet before my feet made contact with solid ground. Harsh contact. Seething through my teeth, I sat and attempted to massage my ankles. It felt like I'd sprained one of them.  _ This is going to put a damper on my routine. _

Something jolted through me when I remembered that this was supposedly Hodek’s territory. It felt inconvenient to realize just how dangerous and probably  _ stupid _ it was for me to follow him just when I'd landed here. I could see no way out. Calling for help was out of the question.

_ Well, shit. _

_ Guess I'll have to stake my life on persuasion. _

Blinking painful tears out of my eyes, I looked around frantically for any signs of life. The trapdoor was shut, with no holes or cracks to shed at least a little light on the dark space. I couldn't see if there was any sort of hallway or room ahead of me. Everything was pitch black.

_ Yeah. I'm screwed. _

Gulping down the anxious lump in my throat, I slowly reached out my hand, attempting to map my way around this space.  _ Maybe I'll hit a light switch or something.  _ As far as I could tell, in front of me was just empty air. I was either in a large room already, or inside some sort of narrow hall.

All comprehensible thought came to an abrupt halt when my wrist was grabbed and a faint, yellow-tinted light illuminated the hallway.

His hands were still soaked in blood, and when I tried to yank mine back, he tightened his grip, and after a few moments, threw me to the ground with unexpected strength. I hit the floor with my face, and felt something snap.  _ I'm dead. _

I clenched my fist, and noticed my twine was still being strained between my fingers. 

_ …maybe. _

Rubbing one of my eyes with a bare hand, I could faintly see him holding the bloodstained bread knife over his head, an ominous glimmer in his eye. All I could make out were the whites; it was like he was possessed.

"Don't you remember what I told you…?" he growled. I tightened my grip on the twine.

"I need to stay here. That forest, it's…you did something. I just—"

His hand came down sharply, and before my mind could process anything my body immediately rolled to the side as the blade was about to come into contact with my chest. The serrated edge grazed my back just barely, ramming into the floor and leaving him stumbling for balance. Almost without thinking again, I made to grab the hilt, twisting it out of his grip.

He stood up quickly, but before he could try anything I struck him directly in the shoulder.

Jeff the Killer collapsed.


	4. Chapter 4

I stepped back and lowered the knife. My chest was heaving, and my hands were almost numb.

"…let me stay here. Please," I breathed. After a few still moments, he began laughing softly. A dark liquid seeped through his cotton sweater and dripped onto the ground.

"You're funny. You're real fucking funny, do you know that?" His gaze remained fixed on the floor. His voice was gravelly, like he had inhaled cigarette smoke for the past five years. I'd thought up until then he was just whispering. But now I realized it probably wasn't his choice to make.

"Do you actually think I'm going to let you stay? In this forest, let alone my  _ home _ ," he continued. "Oh my god. You  _ really _ don't know how things work, do you?" His head snapped up, his eyes containing rejuvenated energy. He almost jumped and tried to snatch the knife back. I did the natural thing and stabbed again, wincing when I realized I’d hit a rib. Jeff made an unnatural groaning sound as he held his side. I gulped down any sort of reaction and took a step forward as he sunk to the ground again.

"You  _ will _ let me stay here," I said firmly.

_ Sorry. _

When he didn’t move or make a sound, my adrenaline faded. I sighed and fell to my knees, still keeping a tight grip on the knife. After a couple moments, he shakily got to his feet, clutching his side. The blood staining the ground and his clothes was almost black.  _ This must be the first time he’s gotten hurt this bad in years. _ I remained motionless as he shuffled quietly away. Out of curiosity, I took a quick glance past him. He was walking towards a well-lit room that looked something like a kitchen. Or a lab.

_ There’s probably a whole house down here. _

I stayed silent, and simply looked as he vanished behind a doorway. I heard the opening of a drawer, and loud rummaging. I looked at the knife in my hand.  _ Of course. Why would I think this is the only one he has? _

Waiting anxiously, assuring myself that I had the upper hand, I slowly reached up and took my mask off. A cool, airy sensation on my face told me that this was long overdue. I gingerly touched the skin around my eyes. It was warm, and far softer than the rest of my face.  _ Do I have some sort of tan line?  _ I tried thinking back to the last time I was outside on a sunny day.

_ …no. Probably not. _

“Kid,” I heard a faint, raspy voice say, and snapped my head up. He was slowly walking back towards me, a sharpened kitchen knife in hand. Blood wasn’t dripping excessively from his chest anymore, but it was obvious he was still in pain. I shifted back, quickly pressing the mask back onto my face.

“…here’s a life lesson for you.” He kneeled down by me, and pressed the knife to the base of my neck. I immediately pointed mine at where his heart would be, and glared pointedly at him. My throat tightened, and it became difficult to breathe.

His gaze became both smug and exasperated. He continued.

“Someone tells you to  _ fuck off?” _ he growled, leaning close until our foreheads were almost touching. “You  _ do  _ it. No questions asked.” He dug the knife slightly further into my collarbone. “Got it?”

I nodded quickly, making sure to distance myself from him as I did so.

He pulled the knife back from my throat, leaving a small nick. “Right now, I just might make an exception, because of  _ this. _ ” He gestured at the bloody patch on his sweater near his stomach, and his face morphed into an attempted scowl.

“But just because I can’t kill you, doesn’t mean I can’t inflict pain.  _ Excruciating _ pain,” he continued, his voice even lower, and his eyes almost red.

Without so much as a blink, I blurted, “What’s in the forest?”

Even the air seemed to pause. Jeff froze for a moment, and just before I was about to dismiss it, he said, “What?”

I looked to the side before reluctantly elaborating. “There’s something in the air in the forest. It was burning. It felt like some sort of fire, or acid. Didn’t…wasn’t that you?”

His eyebrows furrowed, and he looked at me like I was stupid. “You think  _ I  _ did that? What, do you really think I’m the only one who lives in these woods? Hold still.”

My gaze snapped back, and I automatically held the knife defensively again. Quicker than I could see, he twisted it out of my grip and stuck it in the ground, the serrated edge facing me. Before I could think of any kind of defensive action, his own blade was at the side of my neck.

“Now. What’s your name?”

My stomach tied itself in a painful knot at that question. I shouldn’t be telling someone like him information like that. Even if it wasn’t my “real name”, it would still feel wrong to say.

_ You’re the one who had the idea that people like us should work together. _

“…Masquerade.”

He didn’t look amused, as I’d expected. Furrowing my eyebrows, I tried again. “My name is Masquerade,” I said just a little bit louder.

After a moment of consideration, he narrowed his eyes best he could, and I felt him slice abruptly at my neck. I let out a yelp and clenched my teeth.  _ What the _ —

“Like hell it is,” he replied seethingly. “You know, you’re not as funny anymore. I’ll ask you again: what’s your  _ name. _ ”

Left with no other options, I caved.

“Max! It’s…” I gulped down the bubble in my throat.  _ I’m sorry. _ “…it’s Max.”

He smirked at my rushed answer. “Hm. That’s better.”

I narrowed my eyes at him and attempted to stand up, forgetting that my ankle was sprained. He seemed amused as I grit my teeth at a painful  _ crack _ , and fell to the ground again.

“And that reminds me…” he tilted his head, considering something for a moment before quickly slitting my neck deeper in the same spot. I clenched my hands, remaining silent as he repositioned the knife so that his next cut would make a cross on my neck.

“Why in the ever-living hell did you  _ follow _ me, when I told you to get out of my sight and never come back,” he growled, digging the blade into my skin harshly, but just enough so that no real mark was made.

“I had no choice,” I muttered through gritted teeth. I felt beads of sweat collect behind my mask, but I kept it on. He half frowned, creating a small dip in the corner of his mouth where the “smile” began. I felt him dig the knife further, stinging the cut that was already there.

“Bullshit. You  _ literally _ could have gone anywhere.”

“The fog was burning me,” I hissed impatiently.

Jeff sighed, clearly exasperated for whatever reason. A slice even harsher than the one before stung my neck, and I felt something warm leak down to my collarbone. My eyes widened, and I raised a hand to cover the wound when he snatched my wrist again and grinned maniacally.

“Shh,” he whispered, causing the hair on my neck to shoot up. “Let the blood trickle down.”

_ He’s insane. _

Slowly, I reached my hand out and wrenched the serrated knife out of the ground. For some reason, he didn’t try to stop me.

_ He’s  _ really _ insane. _

I shakily held the knife to his heart, trying to ignore the amused look he had on his face. “I…well, first, I just need someone to work with. I feel like I could be a valuable asset to you,” I elaborated nervously. He raised an eyebrow, clearly not convinced I could be of any use to him.

I sighed and raised the twine I forgot I was holding to the little light we had. “I have some pliers, too.” My voice was weakening, and I felt blood soaking into the collar of my shirt. “I won’t ask for anything but to stay here. I’m good at sneaking around, and breaking into houses without making any noise—”

“Yeah. I can see  _ that _ ,” he scoffed dryly, standing up and dropping the knife at my knees. I tried following, but my efforts were wasted; my ankle hurt like hell. So I just settled on kneeling on one leg to regain at least  _ some  _ of my dignity.

“Sir, I can be useful to you.”

He stared at me, his expression unreadable. Finally, he closed his eyes like this was the last thing he wanted to do.

“Tell you what, kid. I’ll give you this one night. If you’re nice and quiet, I might not kill you tomorrow morning.” He slowly made for the “kitchen,” leaving me with two knives, an ounce of hope, and a bleeding X on my neck.


	5. Chapter 5

I found myself collapsing on the ground before I could process anything that just happened. My entire body seemed to completely shut down, my eyelids drooping and my hands suddenly numb from the ordeal.

_ This much trouble just to stay in an underground room with someone who wants you dead. Good job. _

Part of me wanted to argue but I couldn’t find the strength. I fell asleep too quickly after that.

I guess my mind wanted to screw me over in the end because in my sleep I saw familiar faces I couldn’t bear to look at. Something in me felt guilty for even thinking about anything but my family. And yet, here were my immediates whom I forced myself to look at: Anni, Birthday, the Elder, and Event. They were among the few people I could make out in the darkness. Seeing them this clearly felt surreal. I shouldn’t have been able to remember them after all these years.

_ “Masquerade.” _

I flinched at the Elder’s sharp, familiar voice. She was never close to what other people would call a  _ mother _ , but something about the way she said my name this time sent a jolt through me. She sounded almost heartbroken. Angry.  _ Undoubtedly at me. I did something wrong again, I know it.  _ I waited, ashamed, for her next words.

_ “We have been waiting a very long time for you. Why haven’t you found us?” _

I blinked back tears. “I’m sorry.”

_ “You should be. You’re housing with a lowly, beleaguered man for your own sake, you told him your untrue name; you might as well have just run away from your real home.” _

I hunched my shoulders defensively. “I’d like to think I’m doing this for you. I’m…I’m not  _ giving up. _ ”

_ “No. You’re not. And it had better stay that way. We don’t abandon each other, now do we?” _ Elder turned to my closest friends, awaiting their response.

_ “No. Come back to us, Masquerade,” _ they droned in unison. For whatever reason, I couldn’t decide whether to trust them or not. I’d never questioned the Elder in my life, nor was I about to. But none of the others were acting like themselves. I almost called out back to them before I was abruptly yanked awake. Hodek was tapping a knife’s blunt side on my head, as if checking to see if I was alive.

“Hey. I said to be  _ quiet, _ not knock yourself out. Not that I’m complaining.”

I groaned and attempted to get to my feet. “Then…why did you wake me up?”

He raised an eyebrow like he was surprised at my stupidity. “Because I’m not done with you yet, dipshit. What’s that I heard about a ‘beleaguered man,’ anyway?” He grabbed a lock of my hair and tugged my head up painfully. “Huh?”

I squinted, still disoriented. “…you heard it, too?”

“Yeah, I  _ heard _ it. You’re the one who called me that. I have ears, you know.” He sighed, clearly lacking the motivation to get clarity anymore. “Just…stay here. I’ll beat your ass later. But until then, let’s come to a compromise, shall we?”

Jeff took out a knife and lifted my chin so I was forced to look him in the eyes.

“I’ll leave you the fuck alone, and you leave  _ me _ the fuck alone. Got it?”

I nodded hastily and curled my hands into fists.

“Good, ‘cause I’m going out. I’ll see you later.”

_ What? _

“What?” I weakly pushed myself up so that I was sitting instead of just laying flat on the ground. “Why? Didn’t…won’t the fog burn you?”

“Uh, not with this,” he replied, pulling a black bandana out from nowhere and promptly tying it around his face, just beneath his eyes. “I’m not stupid. Go on. Make yourself at home. Might be the last thing you’ll ever do, so make it good.”

“But—”

“Good _ bye, _ Max.”

With that, he had already climbed up some rope ladder I didn’t know was there before and he was gone.

[JEFF]

All I could think about once I’d gotten out of there and into the dusk was how  _ stupid _ this all was.  _ Really! Has my life actually gotten to such a low point that I’m keeping some idiotic, lost hijo de perra in my one hideout while on the run from the police? Am I really so pathetic? _ I shook my head.  _ No. No, I’m not the pathetic one. He should have listened to me! At least if he had left and I got caught, I wouldn’t be seen as working with anybody else, let alone  _ this _ guy. _

I took a deep breath and looked around to see if there were any direction I hadn’t headed in yet during my stay here. When the thought came to my mind that I maybe, just  _ maybe _ go even deeper into the woods, I froze up. Of course I couldn’t leave any kind of indication of where I’d been, so leaving a trail to follow so I could find my way back was out of the question. But not even  _ that  _ dilemma was what stopped me. For one, I couldn’t risk running into that clock-girl again, especially in this state. I could walk, and…that was it. Not a good idea to engage in much else. I guessed it was too easy to notice that I wasn’t in the best shape right now. Trying to get as far away from her cabin as possible was really all I could do at this point.

I took one more step forward, and immediately felt a sharp pain in my chest. I’d forgotten exactly where that kid stabbed me. Yeah, it hadn’t been the legs but it still made walking a nightmare. I clenched my teeth and tried to push forward. It almost seemed like I’d broken a rib. Not ideal.

_ Whatever. Whatever! I can take a fucking walk. A cut hasn’t stopped me before, and it sure as hell won’t stop me n— _

Crack.

“ _ Ow! _ Jesus Christ, what…” I looked down, trying to figure out where that came from. It shook my entire body like I’d been bedridden for days and was just getting up for the first time. Now  _ everything _ hurt. I had no choice but to turn back.

I groaned and made my way towards the trapdoor again. I had no idea of how much that little weirdo heard, but to play it safe I decided to sit down and wait for a couple of minutes. Just to make sure he thought I was out for a little bit longer. Then I climbed down, trying to make the least amount of sound possible.

“Oh. You’re back.”

I snapped my head in the direction from where I heard Max’s voice, and found him sitting cross-legged on the ground, frantically putting his mask back on. For a moment, I felt just the tiniest bit disappointed.  _ He really doesn’t want me to see his face, huh. _ But the feeling faded as quickly as it came when I realized I might have to live with this for a bit. I glared at him with newfound irritation as I ripped my bandana off.

“Yeah. These things have to go fast. Did you really think I’d let myself get caught, especially with people like  _ you _ running loose in the town?”

He seemed to perk up at that. “People like me?”

“I don’t know. Can’t be too sure, but what I  _ do _ know is that you’ve got no place here. Not when I’m around, and definitely not when that  _ Oue-llette _ girl is, either,” I said, looking back up at the trapdoor with disgust. Slowly, but surely, he slid down to the ground in what could only be some strange sense of defeat. “So you  _ haven’t _ seen anyone else. Have you.”

_ Wait. _

“…oh. Don’t tell me.” I scoffed and combed my hair out of my face. “You’re not on the run from the cops. You came here to find someone you knew. Some friends to run away with you to a far-off circus, or whatever.”

Max gave me a withering look. “I think you would be better off not assuming these sorts of things about me, mister…?”

_ Wow. He’s really playing this game. _

After a moment of hesitation, I figured, why the hell not. “Hodek. Jeff Hodek. And you might want to think twice before threatening me, because based on how you’ve acted these past 12 hours I’d say you  _ need  _ me.”

“I’m just trying to get back to—” he started out of frustration, then stopped himself.

“…no. You don’t deserve to know.”

“Fair enough. Then again, you already know  _ all  _ about me, don’t you?” I rolled up one of my sleeves and picked at a scab on my arm, shooting him a sharp glance. He seemed thrown off.

“What?”

“Don’t act even stupider than you probably are. You know,  _ Jeff the Killer _ . Murdered his entire family when he was a kid, lit some poor lady on fire not long after. Even  _ you’ve  _ got to know how fast bullshit like that spreads.”

“I-I’m sorry, I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“You’d better drop the act, buddy. I don’t mean to brag but I’ve got at least 17 officers on my case for crimes I didn’t even commit. Not to say I haven’t committed  _ any _ , but…ugh. Forget it,” I groaned at the guy’s clueless face. “You really don’t know who I am, do you.”

He toyed with some loose twine from his belt and tilted his head. “Would that be a problem?”


	6. Chapter 6

[MASQ]

Jeff looked so surprised. As if this was the first person he’d ever met who didn’t know his “story,” whatever that was. Somehow, I was convinced for a second that he was actually going to explain himself to me, but he simply said, “I’ll find the time to let you prove yourself,” and walked away into a dark tunnel off the side of the hall. I folded my hands and closed my eyes, letting out a huge breath I didn’t know I was holding.

_This is it._

_This is my home for now._

I tried to drive all the conflicting thoughts out of my head, but to no avail. They were all screaming at me, saying that this could never be home. That I was looking for an excuse to stop looking for _them._ I was driving myself crazy, wondering if this was rationalizing or whether I was actually thinking straight for the first time in a while. I hadn’t been stationary like this for five years; didn’t I deserve a break?

I hunched my shoulders and played frantically with a lock of hair as I tried to relax for once. It didn’t feel right. I was convinced that once he’d gotten back, Jeff was going to kill me. Or at least _try._ But he just talked with me for a little and then left. _Is he scared of me?_

Just for a little bit, I held the thought in my mind.

_Of course not. Why would he be?_

_But then why hasn’t he gotten rid of me? Did I really make that good of an argument?_

I stood up and looked around. If this would be where I was staying, I might as well have gotten used to it. There was, obviously, the “kitchen” to my left. It was the brightest place in this entire hideout, unless further down in wherever Hodek had gone was even more so. I spied a small coat rack near the space underneath the trapdoor, where he’d hung his bandana. If I needed to fend him off at any point in the case where he decided he needed to get rid of me, that would do in a pinch.

I continued to ground myself in Hodek’s world, and felt a little more at ease with the situation. This was shared territory now. Maybe this would be the place to regain my humanity, as ironic as it seemed. It was just that killing made me feel so dirty, and selfish.

_So then what do I do now? Do I just rest? What if something happens?_

All these questions I never had the time to ask myself before were hurting my head. So I went to the kitchen to see if there was anything edible for me here.

The fridge was a solid _no._ Everything in there was absolutely disgusting. I guessed he hadn’t stocked it in a while, and sincerely hoped that this wasn’t all he ate. Fortunately, the cabinets were stocked with some bare essentials of cooking; flour, salt, oats, a half used stick of butter, and some other things that I didn’t recognize. How to make oatmeal was almost beyond my grasp, but I managed just fine with what little memory I had and a bit of guesswork. All the appliances worked okay, so I was able to make myself a filling (if not completely bland) meal that would keep me from death just a few days longer. I’d had plenty of experience under a trapdoor, strange as that was. I made a checklist in my mind to find a nearby pharmacy if I ever managed to get out of here for a night and get a drop-bottle of vitamin D. _Especially since we’re in the middle of a forest. Leaves can block out too much of the sun._

I spent three more consecutive days inside that underground house, pacing around, talking to myself, occasionally seeing Jeff step out of what must have been his room to sharpen a knife or throw me an irritated glance. He was still limping, though it was getting better by the day. He seemed to know how to take care of himself surprisingly well. I made a small area near the wall for myself, with a little desk to place my pliers and twine when I didn’t need them and a thin sheet to separate myself from the dirty floor. I always slept with my weapons, though. It was too risky not to.

One night, while I wasn’t necessarily _tired_ but still was trying to sleep, I felt Hodek knock on my head lightly with the hilt of a knife.

“Hey. Mask-boy. Wake up.”

“I _am_ awake.”

“Good. We’re going out.”

I blinked. “What? Why?”

“Why do you think. Get your pliers, grab a knife, whatever works best. I’ll get to the end of the woods, and then we’ll see what you’ve got.”

I yawned and stood up with a twinge of annoyance. _You’d think keeping him inside for days from two stab wounds would have proved something._ I patted myself down in some attempt to find my things, but no dice. I went into a brief panic before realizing they were just on a small night table to my right. It seemed Jeff didn’t want me to be armed and ready in case he needed to quickly get rid of me, for whatever reason.

With that guess in mind, I narrowed my eyes and snatched my pliers and twine off the table. I looked to the kitchen, unsure if I should also grab one of his knives as well. If I pulled it out of nowhere on our first night out, it might feel inconsiderate or like a betrayal of trust. Then again, if he didn’t want me to touch his stuff, wouldn’t he say so?

I thought about it for a bit, and settled for the tiniest blade I could find in the surprisingly packed drawer. I was almost certain I’d pricked my finger somewhere, but it didn’t make any difference to me.

When I climbed up and out, I first noticed that Jeff had stayed true to his word. I couldn’t spot him anywhere and I decided against calling out for him. I just walked in the direction I was sure he was talking about until I saw a distinct silhouette leaning against a tree, looking bored.

“Found your way alright?” I asked. He barely acknowledged me, only started forward and onto the shadowed street. When I caught up, he’d already stopped at a house and was looking up at the second floor window, where a light was on.

“From what I've been able to gather, this is a rich-ish neighborhood. Plenty of big houses. Plenty to take.”

“You mean…money? Food?”

“Oh, you. I mean _lives._ ”

The way he said that almost made me second-guess myself. I’d been able to evade capture for five years and counting. My way of break, enter, kill seemed to get me by just as well as anything else. But what if it didn’t meet the standards of the one person who was willing to work with me? What would that mean for me? Would I be going _back_ a step in terms of my real plan?

I returned to reality by Jeff snapping in front of my face and grabbing my wrist. Instinctually, I tried pulling myself away from him, and he only held on tighter and raised an eyebrow.

“Hey. Calm down. I just need this.”

It took me a good second to realize he was talking about the twine. I’d been holding it in my hand the entire time instead of securing it to my belt like I usually did. I felt kind of stupid, but relieved.

_Well, what did you think he was doing?_

I shooed that question out of my mind. I’d gotten sidetracked enough already.

“Well?”

I blinked twice and nodded, letting the rope drop into Jeff’s hand. My eyes were now fixed on the wall and the window before us. I let my mind reel as much as it wanted with this; I needed all the information possible to work with.

“This neighborhood’s rich?”

“Ish. I’m not really sure.”

“Then there’s probably a lot of families. Even more than average. Do you know if there’s a school nearby?”

“How much time do you think I’ve spent outside of the woods?”

I sighed. “My point is, it’s a good thing we’re looking at the _second_ floor window, because if we broke in through the first then we’d have to climb up stairs. There would be more people to hear us, and more time for them to react. All we need is to get in, question, and kill if necessary.”

“Well, aren’t you…wait, question? Kill _if necessary?”_

“Yeah. I still haven’t found—”

I was about to let my mission slip when I remembered that I still didn’t exactly _know_ this man. I couldn’t trust him with this much. I shut my mouth, and he narrowed his eyes with difficulty.

“…okay. Just so you know,” he continued, flicking a particularly reflective knife like it was some sort of plaything, “not a big fan of the whole _questioning_ thing. So keep it short and sweet. Capiche?”

“Sure.” I felt my face heating up, even though it was a pretty chilly night. I knew he was going to try to get something about my past out if me _now_. If anything were to make sure of that, my little slip-up sure did.

“Good. Because if you take more than five minutes, I’m skewering ‘em. Come on.”


	7. Chapter 7

“…alright, but you should know my twine’s not strong enough for us to climb up a wall. Do you have anything else?”

After a moment, Jeff sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Then why would you even…fine. Just, give me your knife.”

“How did you know I—”

“Because I knew you’d take one. Hand it over,” he answered, twirling his own knife between his fingers in preparation. I reluctantly gave him mine, hoping it would be enough for whatever he had in store. Without another word he stabbed them straight through the wood of the house, one above the other as if he were going to climb that entire distance with just them.

Which is exactly what he ended up doing.

Luckily, the window wasn’t too high off the ground and it had a charming little balcony right in front of it so Hodek could toss the knives back down to me and wait there. But let me tell you, climbing a wooden wall with nothing to hold your feet and pre-made carvings causing your knives to occasionally slip is a lot harder than he made it look. I’d had practice with these kinds of things before, of course. But it took a full upper-body workout and probably five “come on” and “stop breaking’s” to get me to the top. I tried to mask my panting as coughs, but Hodek was able to see through that. I couldn’t be sure of whether that was good or bad, because he let me rest for a minute or so, but I also knew he was never going to take me seriously again.  _ Maybe almost killing him in his own home wasn’t enough, after all. _

After I’d gotten some of my energy back, I stepped inside first and found some crying teenage girl curled up in the corner of her bedroom. There were visible scratches on her arms, her hair was soaking wet, and what I assumed to be her phone lay almost completely broken on her bed. And based on her room’s decor…she was a total spoiled brat. She didn’t even realize I was there, though it may have had to do with the fact that she was crying incredibly loudly and her face was buried in her arms.

“Dude, why are you just standing…” Jeff came in behind me and faltered when he saw the scene. “Oh.”

The girl finally lifted her head and jumped at the sight of us. But she didn’t seem necessarily scared. She looked almost relieved that there was at least one other person there.

“Oh! Oh, my god, I…please, help me. I don’t know how much longer I can take this. I shouldn’t have picked on them so much, I shouldn’t have  _ listened _ to her when she told me to do it, and now…”

Jeff seemed to quickly regain his usual demeanor and stepped towards her, armed with a knife and a wicked smile. “Sorry, sweetheart. We’re not  _ here _ to—”

“Help you with what?”

I spoke without thinking, and suffered the consequence of knowing that Hodek was already deeply disappointed in me. He slowly turned his head in my direction, and it took all my willpower not to look back at him. I kept my gaze on the girl. She let out a shudder of a sigh, tears still leaking from her eyes.

“I-I don’t even know what it is. My phone started acting up, and then something poured, like, a bucket of water on my head. I’ve been getting all these awful texts, and from people I don’t even know! I’m starting to think…it all might be the same person. I know it sounds crazy, but—”

The phone buzzed, and she let out a yelp and covered her face.

“I shouldn’t have done that. I shouldn’t have done it,” she said, over and over again like she was being forced to. Like someone had drilled those words into her head. I turned my attention to the phone, its screen cracking even more by the moment. Slowly, and carefully, I walked over and picked it up to read the message.

_ “Would you two mind?” _

I felt a chill run down my spine at that, and nearly jumped when Jeff placed a hand on my shoulder.

“I know who’s doing this,” he said with a grim look on his face. “Let’s leave. The little shit doesn’t want us here, anyway.”

Confused out of my mind but not willing to question this any further, I nodded and made for the window. I heard him warn the girl, “If he doesn’t finish you off and you blab about this to  _ anyone _ else, I’ll come back here and do the job myself.”

With that, he jumped out along with me and we started on our way again. I was ready to take his scorn for messing up the very first kill of the night, when I eventually realized he wasn’t going to give it to me. I looked over at his face, and noticed it was lined with something between annoyance and fear.

“Mr. Hodek?”

“Huh?” He seemed to snap out of it, not even throwing so much as an irritated look in my direction.

“What was that? What did you mean by ‘he’?”

“…oh. Right. You don’t know any of that. Uh, let’s just say that I’m…kinda glad you stopped me back there. If I’d stolen that guy’s kill, I probably wouldn’t be here right now.”

“What? First,  _ that’s  _ the only thing about this you find a little concerning? And second, can’t you just…beat him, whoever he is?”

“Do I look like I’d be  _ concerned _ by anybody else killing some teenage thing? Hell, she probably brought this onto herself. God knows why someone like  _ her _ would do that, but it doesn’t matter. She’s already dead.” He finally looked me in the eye with pity. “And here’s a quick tip; not all of us killers, kill with knives.” He nodded at my set of pliers and scratched behind his head. “Plus, the guy we just ran into…well, he’s stronger than me. More durable. I would get into why, but it’s not all that important and besides, we have a schedule to stick to.”

“Um, okay.” I didn’t bring up the fact that his “tip” wasn’t really much of a tip, and that maybe the reason  _ why _ this person was stronger than him might’ve actually been important. Instead, I followed in his wake as we made our way to the next house.

[JEFF]

I seriously doubted this guy’s ever even killed one person before. Of course, I’d have to take his word for it until I saw him in action, but could you blame me? And now I was  _ thanking  _ him for holding back, just because our first house happened to already be in the hands of that…thing. It was infuriating. But I couldn’t show all I was feeling, at least not at that moment. I could wait until we got home; letting it all out on the street in the middle of a spree wouldn’t help anyone, except maybe the police who were already on Jeff  _ Woods’s _ tail. Idiots.

While we were both onto our next kill I noticed he was acting just a little bit stranger than before. Not that I knew anything about him, but it was like he was trying to distance himself from all this. Like his mind was just somewhere completely different. Maybe because of what just happened. Maybe because he accidentally said something about what he was trying to “find”? Either way, I didn’t ask him about it. I was still itching to use my knife for the first time in days.

We approached a neat little house on the corner of the street that seemed like it would only fit one or two people, in terms of resources. Though this time, there were no ledges on the windows of the second floor, making it near impossible to get in from those. And climbing stairs to get to these people would definitely be an uphill battle, both literally and figuratively. I clicked my tongue, trying to think, when Max piped up.

“Exactly how much do you know about the people you kill?”

“…enough.”

“And how much would  _ enough _ be?”

“Absolutely nothing. Do you have any ideas with how we could get inside, no close shaves, no loose ends?”

“Not really. I could tie a knot around a window latch if you can find one and see where that gets us, but otherwise, I don’t know.”

“I see.”

He hesitated for a moment.

“…are you angry that you didn’t get to kill that girl?”

“How could you tell,” I deadpanned, folding my arms and starting to pace around the house. He followed me just barely, like he was scared of getting too close.

“Don’t worry. There’s plenty more people around here that might be assholes, you know.”

“Yeah, I know that. Why are you saying these things?”

“So you can slaughter whoever’s inside here later, instead of me right now.”

“Thoughtful. You’re not helping yourself here, though.” I looked down and saw a tiny cellar window poking out of the ground, and felt gears turning inside my head.

_ It’s way too small for me. But it’s not just me this time. _

“Okay. Here’s the plan. You can jam those pliers through screen, right?”

Max nodded.

“Good, because I’m not lending you my knives again. I’m guessing that space right there is about one-by-two feet. You squeeze on in there, try to find the front door or some window near there. You’ll probably see a road and a bunch of trees, that’s how you should know. Then you let me in however you can. Got it?”

I couldn’t see his expression through the mask, but I knew he understood. Without hesitation, he crouched down and got to work, while I took another stroll around the house to see what kind of person would live here. Not more than a minute later, I heard a quiet knock on the doorframe. I smiled.

_ “Now  _ you’re proving something.”


	8. Chapter 8

As soon as I stepped inside I heard a floorboard creak. Besides the obvious deep shit that making any noise would get both of us into, I also felt it was unfair that  _ I  _ was the one who had to step wrong. We both held our breath, but nothing else seemed to move or make any sound.

Then we heard another creak.

And another.

And very soon it was clear that somebody else was up. I looked around for a sign of life, maybe a distant light, but this house was so tiny that if anything was moving I should’ve been able to see it by now. I shifted my gaze towards Max and signaled him to stay close by. He nodded, slowly closing and locking the door behind him.

“Who’s there?”

A loud, gruff voice broke the silence and almost made me jump—a rare occasion, I’ll have you know. Just by hearing it I could see our newest victim now: some stubby, forty-year-old loser with an alcohol problem, who had nothing better to do with his time than sit around. Old habits told me to find this guy ASAP and finish the job. But part of me was curious to see what he would do if he found two elusive nobodies both dressed in white, tiptoeing around his house like they were trying to sneak out to a party past curfew. I stuck to the wall near the doorway, trying to locate where his voice was coming from. A few more calls of “answer me” did the trick, and I found that he was on the stairs to the basement, following the same path Max must have led to open the door.

_ What’s he doing down there in the middle of the night? _

“…ugh. I’m probably going nuts. Why would  _ anyone _ be here.”

By now, I’d moved to the corner just by him, and could see him scratching his head and looking back towards the stairs with resent.

“Stupid…fucking…”

He muttered a few more cusses and incoherent phrases under his breath and made for the other stairway that led to the second floor. It was a miracle it was far too dark for him to see us; I even managed to catch a whiff of his breath, and tried my hardest not to gag.  _ It should be impossible for me to smell anything! Why this? Why now? _

After I heard a door slam shut from above our heads, I crept over to where this guy had come from and leaned into the basement stairs. There wasn’t a chance I’d spot something from all the way up there. Max started walking back down, maybe to see if there was anything he’d missed. His tracks could have been noticed; I wouldn’t have put it past him to leave  _ something _ behind for anyone investigating.

_ Or maybe this guy had some other business Max didn’t see. _

Either way, I followed him this time. The basement was actually divided into two rooms; we walked into the larger one, which was almost completely empty save for a couple of tiny shelves on one wall. I saw the window he’d come through, near the ceiling and apparently unnoticed. There was nothing much else. Maybe a cobweb or two. I looked to the chain-locked door on my left, and opened it to a far smaller room with a child laying on the ground, close to tears. It looked like a boy. He was pretending to be asleep, if not very convincingly; his hands were twitching nervously, his eyes were shut tight, he was almost shaking. The poor thing. With every step I took closer to him, he only curled up more into himself. He couldn’t see me, but he was still afraid. I wasn’t sure if he even knew that I wasn’t his dad.

Then I caught sight of the countless bruises, peppered onto this kid’s arms, legs, face,  _ everywhere. _ Something in me seemed to wake up at that. I felt a new sense of fury rise in my chest and into my throat, but I stifled it for his sake.

“Oh…looks like he’s sleeping,” I said, loud enough so he could hear me but careful not to raise my voice above regular speaking level. “I guess that means we can skip over him…but are those marks I see? Did that lousy father  _ hurt _ his own kid?”

I looked at Max and glared, signaling him not to say a word.

“Maybe if he hears me in his sleep, he could let me know somehow.”

I waited a minute. Then, almost like he doubted himself, the kid slowly nodded, a single tear beading through his shut eyes. He was trembling now, and his hands curled up into fists. Mine did, too. I tilted my head. “I see. Well, come on.” I stood up and tapped Max on the shoulder briefly as if to check that he was still there. “Let’s put an end to all that, shall we?”

“Yes,” he said quietly, with a hint of realization in his tone. “We’ll make sure he never hurts anyone ever again.”

* * *

“Wakey, wakey, dipshit.”

The man’s eyes snapped open and he sat up in bed, looking wildly around like a frightened animal. As funny as it was, I didn’t allow myself to laugh. He still couldn’t see me, somehow. I noticed that recent blood stained the edges of his sheets, and my disgust grew.

“If you’re making me go  _ this _ out of line with my style, then we definitely have a problem.”

“Who are you. Who’s there. I’ll call the police, I can fight you off.”

I let out a disapproving grunt. “Funny. I’ve heard those all before. Oh, don’t worry. I’m sure you can fight a guy like me off for a while. After all…”

I stepped into the stream of moonlight the window gave off, and drew my knife.

“…you didn’t seem to have any issues throwing a little match with your own  _ son _ . Did you?”

He paused, then slowly raised a fist. “The hell do you know about me and my kid. He…he fell. That’s it.”

“On his arms, and legs, and face? From every angle possible? You’re going to have to be a better liar than that if you want to get away with your life.”

Of course, I was lying. I was going to kill him either way. But just for fun, I wanted him to believe that he could have easily survived if he’d put on a more convincing charade. I only hoped Max could tell; he didn’t question me, though it might have been to hide himself just a little bit longer until my say-so.

The guy, after almost a minute, couldn’t manage to find something to retaliate with. It looked like he was considering shattering a small medicine bottle laying on his night table, which was pathetic in and of itself. When he hesitantly stood up and waited another five seconds for me to charge, I realized that this was all he had to offer. He wasn’t going to beg for his life. He wasn’t going to try and deny anymore what he did to his son. He was either ready to fight, or ready to die. It was almost sad, but who would I be to deprive him of that?

“…gut him quick, and we’ll leave.”

“Wh-who are you talking to…? What are you doing—”

“Quiet now, you sick fuck. We’re having a little test run is all.”

Before I could say much else, Max had already strangled him from behind, the twine almost cutting into his neck. He tried to break free, but the pliers went into his stomach like they were scissors gliding through wrapping paper. He was far from dead at this point. A suffering, gory mess, yes. But not dead. Apparently, it just wouldn’t do to stab him straight in the belly.

I frowned and tapped my chin, pretending to think. “What could be missing from this…? Oh, I know.”

I stepped forward while he was still restrained and slowly carved a particularly wide grin into his face.

“It’s  _ joy _ .”

Words could not describe how awful the situation must have looked to an outsider. Everything was covered in blood, and what must have been his barely digested booze. He  _ still  _ wasn’t exactly dead, though I could see the light draining from his eyes by the second. For some reason he didn’t scream. He just choked out something that sounded like a “fuck you,” and I couldn’t care less. For some reason, I actually loved to hear that from a dying man.

“Yeah, yeah. I’ll be sure to do that. In the meantime, my  _ partner  _ and I had better be going.” I shot a sharp glance to Max, who’d nearly knocked himself out holding this guy for me.  _ Admirable. But still not enough. _ I motioned for him to let go, and let the guy fall face-first onto the floor. Before leaving the room, I threw my knife down into his back just to make sure. I heard something crack, and his body went limp.

_ Two in one. _

“Ready to go,” Max muttered, hesitantly wiping blood off of his shirt. I turned on my heels, making sure to grab both of our things on the way out. “You don’t want to touch that. It’s probably mixed with more than what you see.”

I let that sink in before waving him along. Tonight had been enough.

Midway to the trapdoor, I stopped in the woods and pressed a finger to his chest.

“Alright. You definitely tried your best, I can see  _ that _ .”

Immediately, he jumped into defense mode. “I can do better. I swear. I-it was just really dark, and it’s a lot harder to hold someone with a piece of twine and stab them in the gut at the same time than you’d thi—”

“Of course. But you know, ‘it’s really dark’ isn’t much of an excuse for someone who can only afford to kill at night. So I’m gonna take into account, well… _ all that _ ,” I said vaguely, gesturing up and down at him like some physical therapist, “and safely say that you’re going to need a lot of practice. You caught me at a good time, I’ll give you that. And once you’re competent with a weapon you’ll be working for me.”

“Wait, wait, working  _ for _ you? Where’d you get the idea that I’d want to do that?” As I continued forward, he struggled to run ahead and stop me. I gave him a tired stare, then said in a mocking falsetto, “Oh, sir, I can be  _ useful _ to you!”

He frowned. “That’s not what I sound like.”

“Bah, close enough. Point is, you wanna stay with me? Earn it. You’re letting me teach you how to properly kill, and then you’re gonna be my little assistant. Take it or leave it.”

I didn’t know exactly why seemed was so surprised at that. Maybe it was because he assumed that we would be equals here.  _ But we can’t always get what we want, now can we? _

While he was still lost in thought, I snapped in front of his face. “Well? I’m not going to do shit if you don’t actually  _ want  _ to, it’d be a waste of time for both of us. What do you say?”

He narrowed his eyes at me. “…I say fine. Not sure what this whole killing thing does for  _ you _ , but I could stand to learn some more. It’s a deal.”


	9. Chapter 9

[MASQ]

“That’s it. Picture whoever you hate the most in the world. Anyone at all. You could picture me, for Christ’s sake, as long as you don’t kick me that hard in real life.”

“That’s…just the thing,” I managed to say between breaths and hits. “I’m not sure if I really  _ hate _ anyone.”

“What about that dick we killed a couple days ago? Doesn’t he make you angry?”

“No, it mostly reminds me of how I failed on our one opportunity in that neighborhood.”

“Fair enough.”

Hodek had finally taken me to what he unsurprisingly called the training room. Right across from where he slept, in a hallway he disappeared off to every day was where all of his  _ real  _ equipment was. By equipment, I’m talking from bench presses to a wall that held three different rifles and a machete mounted just above. I asked him why he had all this, to which he simply responded, “not mine, but I’m not complaining.” I couldn’t get much more out of him than that. So I let him teach me the basics, which was just a nice way of saying I knew next to nothing about how to actually kill someone.

First, he dragged a large, old flour bag to my feet and told me to beat the shit out of it. Specifically, don’t use any kind of strategy. Don’t think about if this’ll actually hurt it. Just use my fists and feet and whatever else and hit it as hard as I could, for as long as I could.

He really just had to pick the area where I’m most weak.

For the first couple of minutes, I tried my best, I really did. But I couldn’t muster any kind of blinding rage that Hodek seemed to have when he tried demonstrating for me. It was scary how much he could hate a flour bag, for no good reason other than show. It really made me feel like crap.

I took a break from my second attempt to be angry and sat down on the floor in defeat. Jeff scoffed and toyed with one of his sweater sleeves.

“God. It just had to be you. You just had to be one of those people who are so…” he couldn’t seem to find the word. I didn’t say anything, just stared at the ground and pick at a stray thread in the bag.

“…why  _ do  _ you kill people, anyway? You’re kinda touchy about it, it’s not like I’m going to report you to someone about it.”

“Why should I tell you? You don’t tell me much about yourself.”

“So that I know why you’re like  _ this _ ,” he said, gesturing to the lightly molded flour bag. “You can’t even beat up a bag with your bare fists. It’s not like you’re hurting it! What, were you completely sheltered all your life?”

“I’m done with my break. Let’s go back to training.” I stood up quickly and scratched at my arms, not willing to look him in the eye. He sighed after a while.

“Fine. But you’ll have I give me something to work with sooner or later. As far as I know, we could be stuck with each other for the long haul.”

“I wouldn’t prefer that to anything. Maybe death.”

“Gee, thanks. Do you really want to go back to this? You don’t look that up for…”

He stopped when I turned around. I wasn’t sure why. Maybe I seemed different. But he just raised his eyebrows and held up his hands. “Okay. Fine. Do what you will.”

This time, I didn’t need that much assistance or “encouragement” from Jeff. I didn’t even need to think. I was just annoyed at all this, at everything that had led me here. I was annoyed at the Elder for not telling me anything useful on how to find them again. I could kill to get a clear path back. I  _ did  _ kill. But it didn’t feel like it counted all those times.

Now, as one little thing at a time tipped me over the edge, I felt like I really could make it count.

_ Now  _ I was angry.

Apparently, still not enough.

After I’d torn apart what was left of the poor bag, I waited for a minute to calm down and see what Hodek thought of that.

“…alright. Now we’re getting somewhere. But I don’t think you’d be very good as the  _ unhinged beast _ type.”

_ Fine by me! _

I didn’t reply, only turned around and rolled down my sleeves. Jeff’s face had turned just the tiniest bit paler, which was almost impressive. He sighed and walked out of the room, pausing at the doorway. “Class dismissed, I guess.”

“I’m looking for my family.”

I’d managed to stop him by saying that. I wasn’t sure why but I really didn’t want to be alone like this, with my brain wired and my blood still coming down from boiling point. I didn’t want him to go just yet.

“…what?”

“I kill people because I’m looking for my family. Anyone could have information. I can’t afford to be seen so I ask around. And if they don’t have what I need, then they die. Is that what you wanted to hear?”

I didn’t mean to let much more slip, but I couldn’t take it back now. Besides, what was he going to do with that, anyway?

“Well?” I found myself asking. I realized my hands were clenched into fists and I settled on holding myself. Hodek seemed confused, but satisfied.

“Okay. Uh…good luck with that.”

I gave him a seething glare, which he probably saw behind my mask. He furrowed his eyebrows and tapped the wood of the doorframe.

“Hey, I mean that. If you  _ really  _ want to get back to them, you probably will.”

_ What? _

“You do?” I asked quietly. He just nodded and left me alone to my thoughts.

A couple more days passed without us talking to each other that much. I knew he wasn’t scared of me, but it felt like he was of something. Maybe he was worried that I wouldn’t actually be able to help him. He didn’t really test me on my ability to strategize, though, so that would be unfair. For a while, I was starting to believe that he was worried _for_ me. Maybe he knew something about where they could be, or he heard that they were…

_ No. Don’t think like that. You’ve gotten a rest, and now you need to get back to work. _

“I’ll believe they’re dead when I see them in hell,” I said to myself one day, not even noticing that I spoke out loud. Jeff was eating some dry cereal when he heard me. He fixed me with a funny look from across the room, shrugged, and continued with his breakfast. That’s when I crossed the thought out of my mind that he could have anything to do with this.

We continued “training” at least once a week, if you could call it that. But our schedule didn’t mean shit when I couldn’t even tell whether it was day or night and he didn’t own any sort of calendar. Nevertheless, he insisted that I at least try and build some muscle because “brains mean nothing if you can’t even stand up, unless you’re Stephen Hawking.” Despite having no idea who that was, I took his words to heart. Kind of. My body was sore by the end of every day we spent in that room, and I felt like my actual skills were being wasted.  _ Maybe he just can’t help you with  _ that  _ kind of strength. _

Weeks had gone by before he even mentioned that he had a brother.


	10. Chapter 10

“Oh, yeah. Wait, did you really think I’d tell you something as insignificant as that?”

“I don’t know. You just don’t seem the type to keep secrets.”

Jeff genuinely laughed and tapped his forehead. “Well, I’d hardly call some stupid brother a _secret._ And besides, you have no idea. It’s almost like…” he seemed to realize something. “Oh. You think we got separated. You think I’m looking for him, too, don’t you.”

“Maybe. Why wouldn’t you? Is he…is he dead?”

“God, no. I mean, at this point I have no idea. But I wouldn’t go back to him if we were the last two people on earth.”

We were having dinner over a table for once, like two normal people. Not that I’d know much about “normal”. On one of his little outings, Hodek managed to find a huge slab of beef and brought it here so we could have a proper meal. It was about time I had _some_ civilized aspect of my life back. I felt more grounded like this, though having dinner with someone like Jeff seemed bound to turn into something completely different. What kind of _thing_ that would be, I had no idea. I leaned forward and folded my arms over a now empty plate.

“Why?”

His eyes snapped up to meet mine, and he sighed. “Really. We’re doing this?”

“What do you mean?”

“Nevermind. It’s just that…” he stopped himself and curled a hand into a fist. Another couple of seconds passed, and he stood up and stuck his fork into his share of the steak like it was another victim.

“Stupid guy kicked me out. End of story.”

I didn’t know exactly what to say to that. “Oh. Do you know wh—”

“I think I’m good for now, I’m going to bed. You can eat what’s left of my food but if you even _touch_ what’s in the fridge I’ll have your head mounted on a wall. Goodnight.”

“…fine. But I don’t know why you won’t tell me—”

“Good _night._ ”

Before he could disappear into his little hideout like he always did, I said, “Goodnight, Mr. Hodek.”

He turned his head just slightly, and muttered, “You know, you can just call me Jeff.”

_Absolutely not._

“Maybe,” I settled on.

[JEFF]

This guy was insufferable. Maybe it’s some sort of authority issue, but I was so shocked at how much he refused to just call me by my name. I was like he was trying to put a wall up, not that I’d blame him. Did he know that it was probably going to be a long time before he even came _close_ to finding his family, or whatever he said? He got lucky I was trying to limit myself to just two murders per town, otherwise he would’ve been dead the second I got pissed off. And bringing up Liu, of all people, when I was actually trying to do something nice for him…yeah. You could say I wasn’t happy with that.

But he could be useful, I thought. He said it himself. I knew he was mad at me for not even mentioning that he was good at sneaking in and plotting out where to step. I _had_ made the first mistakes on our little run, with picking out a house that was already occupied and then making a floorboard creak on the good pick. So I was kind of embarrassed. Besides, you can’t really compliment someone on what they’re actually good at, or else they won’t try and get better, right? I stuck with the physical part for his own good, though god knows why I’m even helping him.

 _Useful._ Right. I wouldn’t give up on a lost cause if it was written all over him.

As I laid on my “bed,” trying to think things through, I found myself not even wanting to picture Max assisting me on sprees. It felt too weird. Killing feels more like a solo mission, though that might be because I’d been doing it alone for the past…

_Oh. Almost seven years._

I groaned at myself. _Fucking great. How could I have forgotten? Did I just stop keeping track when he—_

“Hodek.”

I sat up, almost hitting my head on something when I heard him at my doorway. I threw a glare in his direction, not at all in the mood for whatever he had to say. Well, he said it anyway.

“I’m sorry for mentioning your brother. Obviously, he upsets you, even if I have no idea how that’d be possible. Uh…I hope you—”

“Max, that is so nice of you. It’s too bad I’ve already decided to hate you because of it. You can go now.”

He looked almost offended, but didn’t argue. He just bit his cheek, nodded, and walked away without another word. I sighed and flopped back down, attempting one last time to clear my mind before falling asleep with my eyes open. As usual.

* * *

 When the sun came up, or at least I assumed it did, I knew I was fucked. And not in the traditional, “the police are onto me again and I have to run” way. It was just that sooner or later, I had to talk to him about what had happened. And I wasn’t looking forward to it.

I held my head all the way down the hall as I thought about what I would eat this morning, if I even got that lucky. It turns out Max had actually listened to me; all of the meat was still in the refrigerator, not even sliced up. I noticed he wasn’t around, either. Maybe he interpreted my “go” as “leave my home and never come back,” but I couldn’t be too sure. Well, okay, I didn’t _want_ to be sure. So I just picked at a little share of what was left for breakfast and waited a couple of minutes. Just in case he came back.

After a long while, I heard faint whistling coming from above my head. It also wasn’t just random notes, it sounded like an actual song. It would have been pretty nice if I couldn’t tell if it was above ground or if I was just going crazy again. I groaned and grabbed my bandana off the floor, climbing up and outside to meet whatever was there.

It was just Max, sitting cross-legged with some Chinese takeout in his lap and whistling a tune. As soon as I set foot next to him his head snapped in my direction and his shoulders relaxed. “Oh. You,” he muttered. I had the strange feeling he wasn’t annoyed, though.

“Why are you up here? Aren’t you afraid of getting caught?”

“Thought you might need some space after yesterday. You know, there’s actually a pretty good spot for Chinese food in that other town. I couldn’t really see its name but I think I’d recognize it if I go there again.”

“So what, you stole that?” I sat down next to him and rested my chin in my hand.

“Remember that one guy we killed a couple weeks ago.”

I nodded, raising an eyebrow.

Max reached into a small pocket on his shirt and slipped out a credit card. I almost laughed.

“Sneaky little thing. Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Why _would_ I?”

“Uh, so I wouldn’t have to bust into a house and steal five pounds of beef just to have a decent meal.”

“…oh, yeah. I guess you’re right.” He stole a glance at me and realized my face was still covered. “You know, you don’t have to wear that. It’s actually pretty nice out here.”

“Sorry, mask-boy. Not risking it. Besides,” I said, flicking his mask right next to the eye. “I could say the same to you.”

He seemed visibly annoyed, but didn’t do much about it. “Do what you have to, I guess.”

“Thank you.”

We sat in silence for a bit longer. He continued eating whatever was in that container, though I couldn’t tell for the life of me what it really was, and by the time he was finished, I had another question on my mind.

“What were you whistling up here?”

He frowned like he needed to think about it. “That…well, I forget exactly where it came from. But I think it was a song my own brother wrote. I can’t remember the words.”

“You’ve got one of those things too, huh. He must be pretty shitty if he hasn’t found you yet.”

“Don’t say that.”

Max sounded almost pained, and his expression grew so stony that I immediately regretted what I said. Before I could take it back, he stood up and gathered his things.

“I’m going back inside. I’m sure you’ve got other plans,” he mumbled with a forced smile. He gave me a little wave as he climbed down and closed the trapdoor again. I considered going with him, but had no idea what I would do from there. So instead, I walked around the forest, being sure to steer clear of the cabin a couple hundred yards from us. It’s too bad I stayed out all day and all night, because I wouldn’t be there to hide the photo in time. And Max would have even more questions for me once he found it.


	11. Chapter 11

[MASQ]

I had to think about that for a while. My eyes were shut the moment I touched the floor, and my immediate instincts were to drink a cup of water and find somewhere comfortable to lay. Fortunately, the tap in Hodek’s kitchen worked fine. Unfortunately, the moment I swallowed the water my throat felt like it was on fire. I coughed and tried to spit back as much of it as I could.  _ What’s in this? _

So I settled on just laying down on the ground for the moment.

It seemed so easy, but after a couple minutes, I couldn’t keep still. His words bounced around in my head, prodding at me, laughing at me. No, not me. At…

I sighed and pulled my mask off my face. I still felt naked without it on, but I wanted to get used to that. Maybe he was right. He never hid his face, and he’d made it this far. So why should I?

_ Because you don’t just throw something like that away! Do you really think they gave it to you for no reason? _

Shut up.

_ You’re finally breaking. You’re starting to doubt them. All because of what some guy said with no actual information about your family! Pathetic. _

“Shut up,” I muttered at no one.

_ Your name is Masquerade. You’ve worked too hard to stop here. This Jeff Hodek has no right to talk about your brother that way, especially considering the relationship he has with his own. _

“He helped me!”

_ When? _

“I…”

I couldn’t think of a response to that. I sighed again and rubbed my eyes.

“Why is this happening. Why now? Why did he even say that?”

_ Beats me. You should just kill him. He’s been slacking off on his sprees lately, I have no use for him now. _

I should kill him.

“What are you…? You’re clearly not  _ me. _ How did you get in my head?” I glanced around myself, hoping that maybe there would be someone—or some _ thing _ —there. Just to be sure I wasn’t hearing voices that didn’t exist.

_ What do you mean, I’m not  _ you? _ I’ve been here from the beginning. _

“No. I’m sure I wouldn’t tell myself to kill someone like Hodek. If I wanted to, I would have done it already.”

_ Don’t trick yourself, now. You think you need him,  _ that’s _ why you haven’t done it yet. Well, I won’t just sit around and let him walk all over you. I know all his tricks. _

“So you admit it. You’re  _ not _ really me. Why should I kill him? Maybe he hasn’t helped me as much as I thought, but…”

_ Isn’t that reason enough, Masquerade? The name’s Angus. And I don’t feel like leaving you until you make up your mind. After all, I helped poor Jeffrey with his, all those years ago. _

“You… _ what? _ No, forget it. I don’t care who you are, I won’t kill Hodek. It’s not worth it.”

_ Hm. Have it your way; I suppose you just aren’t willed enough. I’ll see you and your  _ friend  _ around. That is… _

Something cold brushed my arm, and I backed into a counter, not even noticing I’d walked into the kitchen. I glanced at my hand, and realized I was holding a knife.

_ …unless you have a change of heart. _

When did I even stand up?

I asked the question to myself, realizing with the ringing in my ears ebbing away that “Angus” was gone. I felt my head grow heavier by the second.

_ I’m  _ not _ going to kill him. _

As I lifted myself from the counter I was leaning against and set down the knife, something slipped to the ground out of the corner of my eye. It was an old photograph. At least, it looked that way. It was tattered, even burnt in some places. But it didn’t seem like it was taken that long ago. It took me a while to realize that it was of Jeff and…somebody else. It must have been before whatever accident made him like this, because they both had long, well-kept brown hair and undisrupted skin. The other person had glasses and a shirt with a strange plant printed on it, and Jeff was dressed how he usually was.

_ Is that…his brother? _

I picked it up and looked closer, eventually spotting what looked like a black smudge in the empty space of the picture. Trying to wipe it off didn’t work. Before I could wonder what it was doing there, I heard a gruff, scathing voice right over my shoulder.

“What did he tell you.”

I jumped and turned around, dropping the photo on the floor. It would only make it more obvious to pick it up, so I tried to ignore it for the time being.

“You’re back. What did  _ who _ tell me…?”

Jeff scowled. “The thing that was talking to you. Don’t bother lying, I know he was here. God…he ruins  _ everything!” _

“Wait, that was real? I thought I was just losing my mind, I…”

“I’m going to ask you again. What did Angus Grimville tell you?”

_ Grimville? _

I opened my mouth to speak, but nothing came out. I wanted to tell him, but something was shutting me up. By the way his expression faded to dread, he could tell what was doing it.

“He told you to kill me.”

“W-well, yes, but—”

“That son of a bitch. He really won’t give me a break, will he? Max, don’t listen to a thing he says, he’s only trying to mess with you. He brought up a bunch of personal shit, right?”

I slowly nodded, looking down.

“He said something like,  _ you’re not strong enough,  _ or,  _ you just don’t have the will for it _ ?”

I nodded again.

“It’s a good thing he left before I came back. I think I know what he’s trying to do, but…” he trailed off and closed his eyes. “Just don’t listen to him. Okay?”

“Okay,” I responded, my voice shaky.  _ I just had some sort of demonic entity in my mind who tried driving me to even  _ more _ murder. What could go wrong from here? _

Before I could say anything else, Hodek took a convenient glance at the ground where he saw the photo. His eyes widened, and he looked back to me.

“Wait, did…did you—”

“I-I didn’t do anything to it. I swear.” I stepped back and held my hands up. He cussed under his breath and picked it up, dusting it off and eyeing the front and back of it with melancholy.

“I never told you what really happened, did I?”

I gulped when I realized how close he was standing to me. “What…what happened, then? That’s your brother, isn’t it?”

He didn’t answer directly. It was as if he couldn’t even hear me.

“It’s Liu. It’s us before everything got so fucked-up.”

Hearing that sentence felt wrong. He phrased it like after whatever happened to make him look this way, whoever  _ Liu _ was abandoned him.

“That’s not right. Family shouldn’t just leave you, no matter what you look like—”

“It wasn’t because of the acid,” he said briskly, nearly crumpling the picture in his hand. He seemed to realize what he was doing and set it down gently like an ancient relic.  _ This must be all he has left of him.  _ He glanced at me and sighed, as if realizing he should have expected this.

“We still lived a normal life. Did regular brother stuff. Went golfing on weekends. One time there was a karaoke night, and he laughed at me as I tried to sing without sounding like a dying whale.” Jeff scoffed, but in a strangely fond way. “He knew I killed people sometimes. He was the  _ only _ one who knew.”

“And let me guess, once he found out—”

“He’s always known, Max. He knew since the first kid I slaughtered, because I came to him less than and hour later crying. I didn’t want to go to jail, and I didn’t know what came over me. He never said much about it. I knew it made him uncomfortable, but he never told anyone. And  _ I _ couldn’t afford having anyone else know.” He sighed and stuffed his hands in his pockets.

“Then the police came to his door and asked if he knew anything about me. He tried throwing them off track, but eventually, they found me. So I had to run. And when I asked Liu for a place to stay…he refused. Said it would only put us both in more danger.”

“…Mr. Hodek, I’m sor—”

“No matter how much I pleaded, he wouldn’t let me in. He slammed the door in my face. It’s kind of funny; through all that, I learned that sometimes you  _ can’t _ depend on family. They might be more worried about saving their own skin,” he finished bitterly. He turned to me after a moment of strained silence, his eyes shiny.

“You said you’re looking for your own family, didn’t you. Well, who says they’d even want to take you back after all this time?”


	12. Chapter 12

_ It’s not true. It’s not true. He’s just…mad. About the past. This is different,  _ you’re  _ different. _

“I…I’m sorry, Hodek, I really am. But I know they’ll want me back. They wouldn’t just  _ reject _ me like your brother did you. I’m sure he just didn’t understand,” I struggled to say, twiddling my thumbs. His expression shifted slowly from regret to pure hatred.

“You really think that?”

“I…”

“Listen to me for a second, buddy _. _ I don’t think it’s your place to say that Liu ‘didn’t understand’  _ anything. _ He knew perfectly well what he was doing, and what that meant for me. Tell me, how can you be so sure that your parents, siblings,  _ whatever _ are gonna be so glad to have you again? Huh? Are they criminals, too? Have they been watching you for the past however many years?”

“They told me to come back to them!”

I shot my answer back, not even thinking about what I was saying. Before I could take it back and replace it with something more sensible, Hodek’s mouth twisted into a chilling, almost monstrous smile.

“Oh, did they now?”

“L-let me try again. I meant that before we were…separated, they—”

“I don’t think I’ve gotten through to you yet,  _ Masquerade. _ Whoever ‘they’ are, they’ve given up on you. So I wouldn’t bother trying.”

“Are you afraid that I’m going to leave?”

The moment that thought slipped out, my hand flew to my belt in case something horrible happened.  _ I’ve finally done it. I fucked up. I fucked up  _ bad _. He’s going to kill me for this. _

Jeff took one step closer.

“Care to repeat that for me?” He asked so quietly I could barely hear him. I figured, why stop now. This was as dead as I was going to get.

“You’re scared that I’m going to leave you. You don’t want to be alone again, but you think you will be anyways sooner or later. So you’re trying to drive me away from you, so you won’t have to deal with me  _ choosing _ to go. I…um, sorry. No, I’ve said that too much. Just—”

I was cut off by him grabbing the collar of my shirt and pulling my face so close to his, I could see each vein of his bloodshot eyes. He didn’t even look that angry anymore, but something was telling me this was the most dangerous state he’d been in since we met.

“You think  _ apologizing _ , over and over again, is just going to…oh, my god. You really are as stupid as you look.”

He held my right there for almost a minute more, but then the fire in his eyes faded. He shook his head, dropped me to the ground, and went to sit in a corner of the hall, with his hands tangled in his hair like he was about to rip it all out.

Through all that, while I could have been frightened for my life (which I still  _ very much _ was), all I could think when I saw him curled up there was…

_ He’s hurt. _

Even though everything else in me was screaming to run as soon as possible, I stayed completely still. I was almost urged to follow him, sit with him in silence until he calmed down. But I just stayed there for a few minutes, unsure of exactly what to do next.

“You really like just looking at me, don’t you.”

He glared at me from several feet away like there was some sort of barrier between us. Like he wanted to kill me more than anything, but couldn’t bring himself to.

“I’d like to think that I’m not about to die at your hands,” I said, shakily standing up and walking towards him with my pliers in hand.

“Having you in my sight makes me just a little more sure of it.”

He went still at that. Eventually, his expression grew more confused. “Why would I…” His eyes widened as he realized what had just happened. “…oh.  _ Ugh.  _ Why did I do that?! Stupid guy got into my mind again!” He held his head again, looking away from me in what I assumed was shame. I hesitantly sat down in front of him, folding one arm over my knees and placing my other hand on his.

_ So all that was because of the Grimville thing, too? _

“Don’t worry. I’m not going to leave you.”

I thought about it for a short while, then gave in.

“You’re my friend.”

Jeff lifted his head and furrowed his eyebrows. He looked almost sad. “That’s the stupidest thing that’s ever come out of your mouth. But…”

He sat up and leaned in closer to me until we were about an inch apart. He was practically on top of me. I couldn’t tell for the life of me what he was doing; I didn’t know whether to be scared, or relaxed, or ready and set to use my weapon.

After nearly thirty seconds, he pressed his lips to mine.

I shifted backwards and clenched my hands, not knowing how to process this. Something about him had changed but I couldn’t place what. He was  _ kissing _ me.

He held my face with one hand, stroking my cheek with his thumb. It felt softer than I’d have thought; I almost kissed back, because it seemed so nice. But before I could do anything he pulled away, his expression stony and his eyes as narrow as they were allowed to be.

“How does it feel,” he muttered.

_ That was straightforward. _ I couldn’t lie. “Amazing.”

His hand suddenly shifted to my neck, and he dug his nails into it. “Not that, you idiot.  _ Guilt.  _ How does it feel to actually think about your actions?” He released me, his eyes continuing to bore into mine.

I hesitated. “Oh. Well, I mean…it feels terrible. I usually try to ignore it, but I just can’t. Sometimes, I wish…I wish I didn’t have to feel anything.” I paused. “Why?”

He scoffed and tugged on a lock of hair. “You really do, huh.”

“I mean, kind of,” I muttered. “You can just kill people. Take innocent lives. And you don’t have to deal with anything after that.  _ I _ do.”

He hesitated, then shook his head. “I don’t get you. I really don’t. You’re definitely not human anymore. But you’re not even like me _. _ ”

I opened my mouth to argue, but realized he was right. I wasn’t like him. But I wasn’t close to normal either. After a few moments, I asked him quietly.

“Why did you kiss me?”

“Because I’m a hopeless romantic trapped in a psychotic shell,” he deadpanned, raising his eyebrows like he just told a joke. When I didn’t respond, he sighed and grabbed my chin, yanking me forward. “Because you’re funny, dumbass. You act like some…scared employee, and then you kill someone. You almost got  _ me _ to kill you, just so you could call me out. You’re weird _. _ You’re vulnerable. You’re something else.”

With every word he said, I felt a strange, uncomfortable heat start to flood my face. He was almost looming over me, like a predator.

_ Am I still his prey? _

“So, you…” I gulped quietly, furrowing my eyebrows. “…you love me?”

His grin seemed to widen, and something sent a wave of shivers down my spine.

“No,” he breathed, forcing my arms to the ground. “I own you. Starting  _ now. _ ”


	13. Chapter 13

I couldn’t remember exactly when I fell asleep, but I could later recall eerily specific details of my dreams. One of them, which I remembered the most of, was different from the others. I felt more seated in reality, instead of like I was floating in space. I was sitting on my bed; my real bed, back at the base. It was so nice to be home. Except nobody else seemed to be around.

_ Oh, yes. I remember this day. _

I stood up and tied my hair back like I always did. It was about two feet shorter now, the most I could manage was a small ponytail. I pressed my mask to my face and stood up, my hands curling into fists. There was a faint, almost unnoticeable ambience surrounding me that made me feel nauseous. But I wasn’t going to put this off any longer. I needed to be sure of it.

I walked the long, winding hall down to the Elder’s office where she was most likely reading up on new arrivals, open patrol slots, whatever needed to be done. I could barely see past my nose, it was so dark. I gently knocked on her door, not really expecting an answer, but able to catch a snippet of the conversation going on inside.

“…and would you just  _ look _ at these files, Ernest. Twins, names A and G…it’s just perfect.”

“I’m sure it is, ma’am, but you have someone at the door.”

“Oh! Well, let them in. It’s Masquerade, isn’t it…” she muttered to herself.

“Sure thing.”

A hefty-looking guard unlocked the door and gave me a piercing stare like he’d grown tired of seeing me already, even though I had never met him in my life. He stepped out and held the door open for me, and I nodded to him in a silent  _ thank you. _ The Elder was at her desk and shutting some drawers with a smile as if nothing was wrong.

“Hello, dear. Is there something you wanted to talk about?”

“Hello, Elder. I…came to ask you about my sister.”

“Which one?”

I felt my face grow warm underneath my mask. “N-no, I’m sorry. I meant my untrue sister. Kayla Ryong.”

Her smile slowly faded and she sighed, hesitantly standing up and folding her hands. “Masquerade, we  _ have _ talked about this, haven't we? You cannot go back, no matter how much of a hold your imposters had on your mind. It isn’t safe.”

“I don’t  _ want _ to go back. I was wondering if maybe we could save her, too.”

The Elder raised an eyebrow. This must have been something she’d never heard before. “Save…Miss Ryong? One of those complicit in your capturing? I hope you’re willing to tell me why you want to do this.”

“Because with all my time here, all I’ve heard about my so-called ‘family’ is that my old mother and father were deceitful, amoral criminals. I haven’t learned a thing about what my sister had to do with it. I have no idea whether she’s been just as led astray as me.” I shifted uncomfortably where I stood as the Elder continued to look over me. I needed to watch my words very carefully. I gulped and closed my eyes. “I…I do want to go back. But not to stay with them. I want to see for myself that Kayla can’t be saved. If there’s nothing that can be done, then I won’t talk about it ever again. I promise.”

She mulled over that for a bit. It was clear she didn’t know what to do, and I couldn’t blame her; most of her recommendations came from the more experienced guards and outside sources. Finally, she turned back to me with an apologetic look.

“I’m sorry, son. If this girl truly were one of ours, I would have found out by now. Besides, she is older than you by far, no?”

I nodded, feeling something sink in my stomach.

“Then it may very well be too late if she  _ does _ belong to us. She’s been advised against talking to strangers. She has been taught to repel attackers, or anybody that could be considered such. She is female, which means she is half as trusting as your average teenager. There is nothing now that could sway somebody like her to our side.”

_ Who said anything about sides? _

I scratched my arms, though nothing was itching. “Thank you for your time, Elder. I won’t bring this up again.”

“Goodbye, Masquerade.” She gestured towards the door with a sad smile. I knew she did feel bad for this. But right now, I couldn’t trust that smile to mean anything real.

* * *

I woke up on the ground, feeling worse than ever about the chances of finding my family. My body ached, my face felt like it was on fire, and I knew that something about today was going to be different. I wasn’t sure whether it was for better or worse, and that scared me. I rolled over to try and ignore the daylight that seeped through cracks in the trapdoor and onto my face, while grappling for something that wasn’t there. Like a stuffed animal.

It took me way too long to realize that I’d probably been sleeping with someone.

_ Oh. _

I opened one eye to find that I was actually laying on a blanket. Well, kind of. It was more of a worn out sheet than anything. I saw that part of it had been ruffled, and immediately sat up.  _ Where did he go. I know he’s still here. _

A quiet sizzling sound came from behind me, and I turned around to see Jeff fiddling with the stove, clearly in a struggle. Eventually, he just muttered, “Shit,” and dumped what looked like a completely burnt meal into the garbage can. He seemed more upset than annoyed at this, which was confusing, to say the least. I knew for a fact we had plenty of fresh food; he didn’t have to go to all the trouble of preparing something.

I walked up to where he was standing, scratching at the base of his throat, and put a hand on his shoulder. It was strange seeing him like this; he was only wearing a baggy t-shirt and jeans, and I could see where the burn marks on his arms ended, just at the elbow. He startled at my touch.

“Jesus Christ! Warn me next time, would you?”

“I still would’ve eaten that.”

Hodek paused, then gave me a withering look. “Well, then you’re a little too late. I should’ve known better than to try to cook something like that in the morning…” he said, almost to himself. He let out something of a laugh. “Hell! I should have known better than to do  _ any _ of this.”

“Any of what?”

“You…of course. You’re so oblivious to these things, you know. Just…look, ignore anything I said yesterday. Good or bad. I got carried away, I wasn’t thinking. If I were, I would have known that this wasn’t going to work out any better than—” he stopped before finishing that thought. After a long, awkward moment, he started to walk away and I grabbed him by the wrist.

“Mr. Hodek.”

“ _ Please _ just call me Jeff. It’s not that hard.”

“Where did you learn how to do all that?”

“…listen, Max. Whatever happened last night was a mistake. I thought it’d be different with you, but it wasn’t. I just don’t feel that way towards you. I really don’t want this to happen again, okay?”

“Me neither.”

Jeff opened his mouth to talk again, but didn’t seem to know what to say other than, “What?”

“I don’t really want all that to happen again, either. It was…nice. But I felt weird about it. Everything we did seemed so  _ forced _ . I think kissing is about as far as I’d like things to go, with anyone.” I let go of him, and for once he seemed speechless. He was still just inches from me, and I got that strange feeling in my stomach again. Finally, he said, “You’re perfect.”

And he walked away, as if it made sense to end it there.


	14. Chapter 14

[JEFF]

God. If there was one thing that would inevitably ruin all this, I’d have preferred it to be that demon over Max and I suddenly  _ liking _ each other. I was so disappointed in myself for just going for it like that. I at least could have waited until our whole fight had blown over, but no! And it definitely did not help that I wasn’t even comfortable with sex. Now I knew it’d all been for nothing. I could have told him that. But I didn’t. So now things were very awkward.

I decided to blow off some steam by practicing any killing shit I hadn’t tried up until that point. Not sure if anybody’s noticed yet, but I have a pretty wide repertoire of techniques for any situation. You’d think I was preparing for the end of the world, and I wouldn’t exactly blame you. During the five or so minutes that Angus Grimville got in my head seven years ago, without him even saying so I was convinced that I had to do whatever it took to improve on  _ everything. _ Well, everything related to murder and combat. I was so obsessed for such a long time that even when depression hit, I still worked out. I still carved  _ JOY  _ into trees, laughed out loud and cut around my mouth whenever it felt like the scars were starting to heal. I still went after any other killers, racists, pedophiles, you name it that crossed my path. Maybe I was trying to make the world a better place. I liked to think I was proving myself to someone, out there. After all, in our little family “business” I never actually did any work. So what better way to get out of my own head than practice old habits?

The crappy analog I strung to the wall was always about an hour behind, so I didn’t bother looking at it half the time. But right now I felt compelled to check a whole lot more than usual, and time moves so much slower when you do that. Annoyed the fuck out of me. Not that I knew much about Natalie’s life, but one thing we could have agreed on then was that time is nothing but a pain. Everything started to hurt the more I punched, kicked, sliced, and stabbed. Even though I knew that if I stopped, then I’d either have to just sit there in my misery or talk to Max, I had to face it at a certain point. I was getting tired. And not just of practicing, or anything that a full night’s sleep would fix. I was so tired of this life, but I couldn’t turn myself around now. It was far too late.

Right when I was about to take a break, I heard three knocks on the doorway and turned my head to see Max standing there with an unreadable expression. I groaned.

“Is there something you aren’t picking up here, or do you just not care if I want to be alone.”

“You obviously don’t. We should talk.”

Something in me stirred. It’d been so long since I had just…talked to someone. Not an argument, not a three word exchange, not plans to break into someone’s house. Just a talk. I sighed and dropped the absolutely wrecked dummy I had been “killing,” and he walked up to where I was standing. Eventually, I just sat down and let out a huge breath disguised as a cough. He didn’t have the right to know that I was working so hard for practically no reason.

“You don’t have to leave the room every single time you don’t want to deal with me. In fact, I’d prefer if you didn’t do that.”

“It’s not that I don’t want to…well, yeah, that’s a big part of it. But I just don’t see why I should let you know everything about myself when you’ve told me, what,  _ one _ thing about your past?”

“Hey. You brought this upon yourself. You could’ve left that mention of your brother as it was, but instead you gave me the whole story. Clearly, you’ve been waiting to tell  _ someone _ how you felt about it.” He sat down beside me, hands twitching, like he was second guessing himself.

“I…don’t really have a family in the traditional sense. None of us are related to each other. I did have what you had, at some point. But those people were liars. And they’re dead now.”

My eyebrows knit. “Then what did you have?”

“…definitely something else. I’m still not giving up on them,” he added with a stern look. “It would take a lot more than…you know,  _ what you said _ to change my mind. But I don’t even know where to go from here, and I can’t ask anyone for help. Nobody I talk to believes what I have to say. And nobody who sees me can know I even exist.”

I wished with all my heart at that moment that I couldn’t understand that feeling. You make a stupid mistake when you’re young and suddenly, you pay for the rest of your life with all your connections severed. I weaved my fingers together and nodded. “Are you going somewhere with this.”

“I think that at this point, given what we’ve done, I’m allowed to tell you who I’m really looking for.” Max pinched the bridge of his nose underneath his mask, and for just a split second I remembered that I  _ had _ seen his whole face before. Just last night, in fact. I averted my eyes and tried not to think about it. Didn’t bother asking him what  _ allowed  _ was supposed to mean, either. “Um. Go for it, I guess. I don’t have much else to do.”

He slowly looked up at the wall in front of him as if he were staring at a ghost. “I met my Elder when I was about ten. I don’t know exactly what happened before, but I woke up in a dark room and saw my brother standing there. He welcomed me to the family. I didn’t know what was going on so I started crying, and everybody there just watched. It was so weird. The Elder kept on dragging me to different rooms later on, like she was trying to convince me of something. I can’t even remember what she said. But that was when I started getting used to it all.”

“Used to what…?”

“Just being there. I started feeling at home. They explained to me that my old parents…they were evil. They’d lied to me my whole life and were keeping me from who I truly belonged with. I didn’t believe it at first, but the more I saw, the more I realized that they were right. Everybody else seemed so happy there. So I stayed.”

_ Like he had a choice. Who even are these people he’s talking about? Did they brainwash him or something? _

“If you don’t mind,” I said, not meaning it at all, “what did they show you that convinced you to stay with them?”

He seemed to think. “I’m not sure. Like I said, I just got used to it. They didn’t let me outside until they knew I could do my job and that I wouldn’t run away, and I can see why. It wasn’t the most comfortable place, but I loved it. And they all loved me. Got me this mask,” he added, adjusting its right strap. “It suited me. Still does.”

_ Okay. I’ve heard all I need to know. _

“…so you were indoctrinated into a manipulative cult that thrives off of abducting random kids on the street. Got it.” I stood up and brushed myself off, just about ready to leave. Surprisingly, Max didn’t move. But he did seem really pissed.

“Why are you so obsessed with making me doubt the only people I could trust?” He scoffed. “You know what, you’re just like all the others. You won’t believe me. Or maybe you do, but you don’t want to admit it.”

“Think what you want. Just letting you know, maybe if these people  _ really  _ wanted to find you again, they’d put some sort of tracker on you.” I went to walk out of the room, thinking that was the end of this conversation.

“Who said they didn’t do that?”

I stopped and looked at him out of the corner of my eye.

“…your ‘family’ knows where you are? Right now?” I asked incredulously. That couldn’t be what he meant, but what else could I have assumed?

“Not anymore, they don’t. When I got sent to back to my fake home the police took it off of me. It felt like part of my soul had been ripped out.”

_ Or a chip in your skin, more like.  _ But I knew better than to say that out loud. He sighed and folded his arms over his knees.

“The Elder thought of it. She was…no, is. She  _ is  _ very smart. And I wish I still had it with me. At least then, I could get some answers.”

“Answers to what?”

“To why nobody’s ever believed me.” He looked up with a sense of burning determination. “So maybe think what  _ you  _ want, Hodek. It won’t matter either way to me. Now, I just want you to help me find my family again. Would that really be too much to ask?”


	15. Chapter 15

[MASQ]

The irony of the situation was that neither of us wanted to talk about what had happened between us that last night. It was so uncomfortable, we kind of just skipped it. Of course, I was still too annoyed to even think about it, and he left the room with a defeated look as soon as I ended the conversation. I was hoping more than anything for another dream about my family after this. Something to keep me tethered to my past. I’d have thought that by now, I would have lost sight of them and forgotten about everything I was looking for. But staying with Hodek for almost a month now did something strange to my head. I was becoming even more desperate for a way out; maybe because I wasn’t used to living with someone in this close proximity. Or at all.

_ So this is love,  _ I thought bitterly.

Another couple of days passed without him giving me an answer to my question. I assumed he did want to help me, but that he wasn’t sure if this was the right way to do it. Appreciative as I was of that, I didn’t care if there was a “right way” of doing anything anymore. In the mornings he’d just sip at cold coffee and look at me like I was some feral cat that would bite him if he got too close. I tried my best to ignore it, until one day when I decided that this was going on for too long. I poured myself a glass of water, noticed it was still contaminated, and poured it out with a sigh.

“Hodek, I’m angry at you. I think we should go out again.”

He raised an eyebrow and set down his cup on the table. “Took you long enough. What, was it me looking at you all the time? No training?”

“It doesn’t matter, I want to leave this place again for once. Last time we did was…” I searched for the word. “…it definitely wasn’t  _ fun _ . But I felt like I was growing. Like I was proving something to you, even though I wasn’t really.”

“You did.”

I paused. “What?”

“You proved something. You were good at breaking in, you were light on your feet. You stole the guy’s wallet without me even knowing. It’s no wonder you were able to get around all these years. It wasn’t  _ great _ , but I could still see it.” Hodek didn’t seem to realize just how much that stuck with me, he just zoned out and scratched his neck.

“Why didn’t you just say that before?”

He chuckled. “Uh, yeah. I can’t just let you know how well you really did the second we get back. Then why would you bother to work? I mean…look at how well _training_ you actually went, but still.”

“Hodek, I’m not a slacker. It wouldn’t have mattered that much if you told me that I had some things down. If you wanted me to do better, I would have tried to do better.” I’d lied about that middle bit but meant everything else. I had never been raised to quit when I’m at the bare minimum, not even by the Ryongs. Hodek’s eyes darted to the wall.

“Okay, well, I don’t know how you do things. I barely know you, period.” He looked to me again, curious. “You said you wanted to go out again?”

I nodded.

“Then we might as well. But as to who exactly we’re going for, we might be at a crossroads.”

“What do you mean? Don’t you just go around and pick random houses?”

“Yeah, I  _ used  _ to do that. This is different. You want information, and I’m trying to…well, I guess you could say I make a clean sweep of all the shitty people I come across. So we have to be careful about this.”

“You’re turning around,” I said, not even thinking about how he’d answer that. He shifted his arms, drawing them into himself like he was trying to become smaller.

“Don’t say it like  _ that. _ I’ve just been on this weird high for years now, killing anyone I see unless I really can’t take it or I’m too lazy to. Did I tell you Angus was the one who drove me to start this whole mess in the first place?”

I shook my head. I wasn’t as surprised as he probably thought I’d be, but it was still kind of jarring to think that at one point, Hodek had been normal. Normal and happy. He sighed and stood up.

“Get your stuff, and by that I mean whatever you can carry on you without being weighed down. You still have that asshole’s credit card?”

“Yeah, what for?”

“Just in case. I have a feeling we’ll be taking something more back tonight.” With that, he stuck his hand under the table and wrenched at something. Before I could react he pulled a carving knife out from underneath and brushed a finger over the edge.

_ How many hiding places does he have for those? _

I looked to the trapdoor and realized something.

_ How long has it been  _ nighttime  _ for? _

* * *

Whoever was living here definitely didn’t get the word that there might be murderers on the loose in town, because when Hodek and I arrived at their door we found that it was unlocked. Based on the number of things that unsettled me these days, I said nothing about it and neither did he. He decided to wait outside again and let me see what I could find. How many people lived here, if we had any night owls, etcetera. “Don’t forget, you still work for  _ me _ ,” he’d said, trying his best to seem like he didn’t care about me. At this point, I was sure I knew better, so I dismissed his little act.

I was surprised that there were some lights on the first floor that had been left on, though based on what little food and furniture I could find, only one person was staying in the house. I ascended the stairs quietly, careful to stay near the wall on my left. A gentle draft coming from some window above my head made its way to me, and I paused.

_ Has someone broken in already? _

I shook myself and continued. That was something we’d only have to worry about later. The notion eventually came to me that maybe whoever lived here had a death wish. Saddened, but calmed, I started humming a soft tune under my breath, trying to recall the words in my head.

_ Don’t struggle, iffy kid, I’ll be right there for you. _

I opened a door to the right, and found an empty bed. The window in there was opened as well. Something was itching in my throat, and I tried to ignore it.

_ Don’t smile if it hurts, you need some resting too. _

This was usually the part of the job that I hated the most. It was always a gamble either way; if I ended up finding someone, they might not be able to answer to anything. Even if they are, I’d still have to kill them. And if I  _ didn’t  _ find anyone, it would be a waste of both Hodek’s and my time. It was getting to the point where I had no choice but to venture upstairs again. There was nothing on the second floor, not so much as a vacation photo on someone’s night table.

As I made my way up, I noticed that even shifting my weight to the wood closest to the wall wouldn’t do me any good. The stairway was so much louder than the rest of the house, I was scared that somebody might hear it from across the street. Anymore of tonight’s luck and I wouldn’t have to worry about waking any nonexistent resident of this house up. But at the final stair I saw a faint light emanating from underneath the crack of a door. And not normal ceiling light, either. Just the harsh, white kind that could only come from a few things.

_ Be braver than the guys who need their blue to stand. _

I wiped a sweaty hand on the bottom of my shirt and opened the door just slightly enough to see what was happening inside. To my surprise, nobody jumped out at me or asked, “Who’s there?” In fact, I was certain for a moment that nobody was in here at all. As per usual. Just as I was getting ready to abandon all hope for this house I spied a small figure slouched over what looked like an open laptop. It was difficult to make out what it actually was without blinding myself, but it seemed like a young woman had fallen asleep while doing  _ something  _ on there. What she could have possibly needed to do on a computer at midnight when her home was probably empty all day, I had no idea.

_ Maybe something else is hiding up here, too, _ I thought, pausing the song in my head. I couldn’t remember the rest of the words, anyway.

A moment after I pulled my head back from the doorway, I heard Hodek’s voice from downstairs.

“Hey. Mask-boy.”

I didn’t bother answering. Once there was absolutely nothing left to be found, I’d report back.

_ “Max,” _ he hissed. He sounded almost worried. I knew that nobody was awake. Slowly, I climbed back down the stairs and prepared to tap him on the shoulder. But instead, I froze.

_ Wait. _

He was scratching his arms underneath his sweater, carefully advancing forward like something might jump out at him. A sense of curiosity rose in me when he groaned and muttered, “I can’t believe he’s making me…”

_ So you  _ do  _ care, _ I found myself thinking. Hodek sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose.

“…Masquerade?”

“Yeah.”

He almost tripped over himself turning around, and I saw that his face had gone completely pale.

“Max, you little shit! Why in the world would you even—”

I held a finger to my lips and pointed up the stairs. He clenched his teeth and lightly flicked my mask.

“This is  _ literally  _ the worst time and place for whatever the hell you just pulled! When I come inside and call for you, you get back to me as soon as possible. Anything you can’t find in five minutes obviously isn’t worth looking for.”

“Well, that’s one of the stupidest things I’ve ever heard, but can we please do this later? I found some girl asleep on her computer up there and I’m sure she’s the only one—”

“Hello?”

A voice that sounded like it had come from above our heads stopped us in our tracks. It was a miracle nothing shifted or creaked under our weight, otherwise everything about the plan would need to change. Hodek looked me in the eye, nodded and started upstairs, where it seemed like whoever had woken up assumed we were just the wind. I followed.


	16. Chapter 16

“Ugh. This is so stupid. That scream is just messing with my head,” the woman muttered, realizing that she had fallen asleep and resuming her activities. She was completely oblivious to the fact that we were both right behind her chair, waiting for a good moment to strike. I was almost leaning on a bookshelf that had been placed near the wall, and Hodek simply stood by me with a hand on my shoulder as if he had to hold me back.

I felt something brush my foot, and looked down to see a shotgun leaning against the drawer. Without the light coming from this woman’s laptop, I wouldn’t have noticed it.

_ She’s not suicidal. _

_ She thinks she can handle people like us. _

“…ow,” she muttered, holding her head and turning sideways in her chair to get her line of sight away from the computer for a while. We both shifted to the right as silently as we could.

“Why is—”

The computer made a loud screeching noise, the screen seemed to split, and with another five seconds it was completely off. For a moment, I thought it had died, but the woman just sighed and plugged it back into a charger as if this went on every day. She jammed the “on” button a couple of times, impatient. By some miracle it came back to life, though I had a feeling that whatever had happened was a little bit more than just a glitch. It was almost like something had passed through it for a short while, but I shook my head and tried to stay focused. I noticed Hodek kept a particularly sharp eye as she typed in her password. In perfect sync with the clacking of the keys, he mouthed, “R, K, I, O, 2, 0, 6.”

The woman kept muttering reassurances to herself, like she was simply hearing things.

“That Giovanni kid,” she said with a sneer. “I told them, if you keep this little charade up then something  _ will _ deal with you at one point or another. Did you listen? No. You didn’t. And now you got what’s been coming to you. If I lived just two doors down…” she paused her excessive typing and sighed. “God. Wish that’d been me.”

I didn’t know whether to laugh or knock her out right then. She seemed so sure of herself, it was almost funny. Hodek seemed a little more than annoyed at this, though it looked as if something she’d written convinced him too. He drew his knife, narrowed his eyes to the best of his ability, and whirled the woman’s chair around faster than I could even see. He stepped on its edge and covered her mouth before she could scream or say anything.

“I hope you know that I was about to leave you alone before I saw  _ that. _ What are you, five?”

As she struggled against him, he let out a little disapproving sigh and raised a hand so the knife glimmered in what little light there was. She stopped she when caught full sight of it. After a few strained moments, he removed his hand but kept a grip on the collar of her shirt.

“What’s your name,” he asked under his breath. As she was about to respond, he pressed the dull side of the knife against her neck.  _ “Quietly, _ now.”

“…Rachael. Kione. P-please don’t hurt me, I can—”

“So I wasn’t far off. Don’t worry, we’re not here for that.”

“We?”

Hodek seemed to realize his mistake, but didn’t show it too much. He continued. “Do you happen to be married, Rachael Kione? Any kids, roommates…?”

Rachael hesitated. “Yes. Two little boys downstairs. They mean the world to me, and—”

“Liar,” Jeff muttered, releasing her and glancing to the side. “If there were anyone else in this house I would’ve known by now. But like I said, don’t worry.” He looked back at her, tilted his head, and kicked the chair towards the wall with surprising force. She helped with terror, almost falling off. Hodek flocked the tip of his knife upward in a gesture.

“Get up.”

She got up.

_ Not so brave now. _

“Turn around, and put your hands behind your back. Anything you’re holding, drop it.”

“I-I’m  _ not _ holding anything.”

“Good.”

I held back a snicker. “What are you, a cop?”

Hodek gave me a stern look. “Hey. I thought it’d be practical. As for you,” he said, turning his attention to a now shaking Rachael, “I wouldn’t normally be in the mood for this, but since I’ve grown bored of  _ normal _ I’m going to let you go. I’ll just be needing that computer of yours.”

“I—” Rachael paused, and though she was facing the wall I could sense her confusion. “Wait, really? Just that?”

“Want me to take something more?” Hodek growled, frightening even me for a second. Rachael flinched.

“No! Nope. I’m fine, thank you…!”

“That’s what I thought.”

_ What a turnaround. He really doesn’t want to kill her? _

“Hodek, are you sure about this?” I muttered. In truth, I was hopeful that he was being true to his word. He scoffed. “Of course. Ever known how fun it is to give someone a scare? It’s like a little high.”

“Can you please just go?” Rachael’s voice was almost inaudible. It was as if she’d almost lost it. Hodek tilted his head and raised an eyebrow.

“Well. Not like we were going to stick around for much longer. Come on.” He waved me over such that it seemed he wanted me to specifically get away from the wall that she was facing. She was still shaking, and I thought I could hear a tiny lapse of sobs from her. It didn’t exactly faze me. I complied, and not one second passed after it that Jeff took his knife and threw it straight into her head.

In spite of my surprise, the first thought I had once I’d regained my balance was,  _ That makes more sense. _ I blinked once, twice, and was able to see clearly again. It had happened just like  _ that _ . It almost saddened me to think that this woman might have felt relief at Hodek’s supposed change of heart, only to have that ripped away. My brain felt fuzzy at this sight. I narrowed my eyes.

“How could you do that?”

He walked over to Rachael’s body, limp against the wall, and examined the gash in her head. “Oh, well, you make a hobby out of something and next thing you know you get pretty good at throwing knives. Do you think it reached the wall?”

“No, I mean how could you just kill her? It’s not like she was going to—”

“Tell anyone about it? Go to the police? She sure as hell  _ would  _ have if we didn’t stop her.”

“I…I know. It’s just that you even said you weren’t going to hurt her. Seems a little unfair, doesn’t it?” I forced a small laugh, though that didn’t do much to convince him I didn’t care. Hodek waved a hand dismissively.

“Yeah, yeah, but…”

He shut the computer with a single finger as if it were contaminated with something and held it out for my taking.

“Happy Holidays,” he said with his driest possible voice. I gave into the temptation to brush this all off, and raised an eyebrow. “How would we even use it? We don’t know…”

I stopped at the exasperation on his face. He sighed and opened the laptop back up.

“I keep forgetting you're an amateur. I mean, it was in her  _ name. _ ”

“What, the password? Is that why you asked?”

“Oh, I just did that to check. I could see her type it in, you know—or were you just too busy looking at my beautiful face to notice,” he said without a trace of irony. Without another word he handed me the now opened computer with a look that said,  _ You’re welcome. _ I tried to ignore him and took a good look at what was in front of me.

A message sent five minutes ago on some social media site that read,  _ “Of course you are, honey. Just do it. The world would be better off.” _

Something in my gut twisted. I didn’t even want to read further up, that sentence gave me such a horrible feeling. I furrowed my eyebrows and ended up taking an unfortunate glance at the message she’d sent before that.

_ “Ugh. KYS already I’m so sick of this.” _

I wasn’t sure of exactly what that meant, but I knew it was bad. Way too bad, considering how distraught all the replies sent her way seemed. Hodek folded his arms as if to prove a point.

“And besides, I don’t think that innocent life I took turned out to  _ be  _ so innocent after all. You wanted information. Well, this might be something of a ticket.” He gestured towards the computer and started to walk out. I looked at the shotgun leaning against Rachael’s shelf, her bloodied body hanging an inch from the ground, and eventually left.

_ Why even bother thinking I could be right for once? _


	17. Chapter 17

We didn’t end up taking the shotgun with us, for some reason. With Hodek’s whole impression I’d have assumed he collected the things. But either he couldn’t see it, or didn’t care. So we only had the laptop in tow as we made our way to the next house. I had the opportunity to actually question the man living there. Fortunately, he was sleeping, so we could take our time.

Unfortunately, once he woke up, it was pretty clear he was going to put up a fight.

When his vision adjusted to the dark and he spied two men in his bedroom, with one of them holding a knife to his neck, his eyes widened and he instinctively elbowed me in the stomach. Hard. He hardly had to wind up, which made it even more difficult for me to react in time. I was knocked back a good couple of feet, and by the time he stood up I was ready to charge at him.

“What are you doing in my house,” he half-yelled. I guessed he was trying to alert his neighbors by being purposefully loud, but it didn’t last too long. I kicked him down so that he landed on the floor, but his head still hit the wall.

“Be quiet, or I’ll just kill you faster,” I said through clenched teeth. I had the knife position above his heart. He didn’t flinch, only used an arm to support himself.

“Kill me _faster?_ What would it matter? Who even are you?!”

“I’m nobody. Just work with me, sir. Please.”

“Oh, ‘sir.’ Like that’s going to keep me from—”

“Do you know _anything_ ,” I interrupted, holding the knife closer to his chest, “about anyone named Birthday?”

The man’s face nearly contorted. He paused. “…what?”

“Anniversary.”

“What are—who would name someone that?”

“Iris. Jade. Carol, Laurel, Event, _something?”_ My words became more rushed as his stare became more blank. Eventually, when I realized I had no luck here, I sighed.

“Alright. So you don’t. I’m sorry it had to end like this.”

And I drove the knife flat into his throat.

It was odd, to see another person die by my hand after that little break. I felt like something in me had sprung back to life at the expense of something else. His eyes rolled back, which I could definitely do without, and after an agonizing five seconds he finally stopped moving. Hodek looked like he wanted to get going, but I signaled him to wait. I slowly walked to the man’s closet and rummaged through until I’d found a baseball cap. I folded his arms over his chest like he was already in a casket, and placed the hat on his face to cover it.

“Okay. I’m ready,” I muttered after what felt like forever. It felt almost like Jeff was going to say something to comfort me, which would have been a surprise. Good thing he didn’t.

I washed the blood off my hands and we headed home, with him throwing constant sympathetic looks my way.

“…you okay?”

My eyebrows knit in frustration. “Yeah. This happens all the time. I’m used to it. Why wouldn’t I be okay.”

“Alright, it’s just that you seemed pretty upset that the guy had to die. I’m actually kind of jealous. You’ve wiped your entire existence off the map by now, haven’t you?”

“Yeah, and you—” I started, but then I realized. “…oh. Right. _The Killer.”_

“It’s really that hard to just say my name, isn’t it,” Hodek muttered. He said it almost like a joke. After a moment, he shook his head.

“When we first met, and you didn’t know who I was, I was a little put off. Not because I was mad, it’s just that any other person would have recognized me. It was a nice change.”

“So you don’t like fame. Or, wait, you don’t want to be caught.”

“It’s…kind of both? And kind of neither. People are going to know who I am, that’s not the problem. The problem is when they see my face and immediately think of someone different. I didn’t have to deal with that when I met you, but it’s still messed me up after all this time.”

“What do you mean? Is there someone even _more_ famous who looks just like you?”

“Ugh. That’s half of it, I guess. This _Jeff Woods_ character. He’s all over the place, everyone knows who he is. It’s so annoying. He’s basically a younger, more fucked-up me. The media’s done something, I tell you. I wouldn’t even be complaining if I actually knew the whole of what people think of me.”

I thought about that for a little bit.

“Well,” I said, tapping the computer he had in his hands, “I’d say you have the means to find out now. But at this point, why should you care? You can’t show your face in public anyway. I think you’re good just as you are, and _I_ had zero expectations for you.”

I saw his expression change as he processed what I said, and realized that I wasn’t trying to make him feel bad. He turned to me and furrowed his eyebrows. “You know, Max…you’re pretty okay.” It seemed as though it pained him to say that, but I had a feeling he was just acting. I took his free hand, to which he didn’t complain.

“That’s nice to hear. And, uh, by the way…”

I nodded towards the building that we’d stopped at without even fully realizing it. Hodek looked up to the neon-lit sign that read “Bú Xìng: Authentic Chinese Cuisine” with apprehension.

“So this is the place. Why would it be open at this hour?”

“Who knows,” I said, opening the door and dragging him inside regardless. “Come on, the food’s actually really good.”

* * *

 “…and then I smashed the bottle and stabbed him in the leg with it.”

“No way.”

“Uh, _yes way._ This is me you’re talking to, you think I wouldn’t do that?”

We tried navigating the streets for the rest of the night, our hands full and conversation never dying. Hodek had seemingly endless stories about all the fights he started, the homes he broke into, the people that almost got away. It was a relief not having to fill the silence, because there was barely any. Once we found a shortcut to the forest, we almost walked slower. It was as if we could tell that neither of us really wanted this to be over, and that made me happy. He asked me a couple of times if I had anything interesting happen over the last five years, but every time I racked my brain for stories I came up empty. So I just listened for now. Besides, it was a good thing at least one of us wasn’t talking, because that meant I was able to hear the commotion on the street before he did.

“I don’t know if I told you this already, but there was that one night where I ran into this girl, Jane. Never met her in my life, but she went _ballistic_. It was like she thought I killed her family,” Hodek said, apparently expecting a reaction. I tilted my head at a ringing in my ear before I realized the noise was coming from around the corner.

“Hey, do you hear something?”

“Very funny. Anyway, I was—”

“No, Hodek, seriously. I think there’s…”

I trailed off as we turned onto the road and saw blinding lights that flashed red, white, and blue.

_Shit._

“Shit.” Hodek grabbed my hand and booking it to the other side of the street where, thankfully, the forest began. My heart pounded, and the thought of even being seen by the police sent my imagination running wild. We both ducked behind a pair of trees, not bothering to make it past that. I noticed none of the cops blocking the road a couple hundred feet ahead were even looking in our direction. They were all fixated on something happening ahead. I heard an officer trying to talk through his megaphone as the same woman yelled things of a similar nature over him.

“Alexandra Schröder. Please stay right where you are, the police—”

_“Alex, don't just stand there, help me out, for Christ's sake!”_

I couldn’t see anything going on behind the cars besides somebody being restrained—not very effectively, at that—and several other people peeking through their windows but too scared to actually step out of their homes.

_“Alex! How fucking dare you just—you're nothing without me! Nothing! You had nothing to lose when you came with me. Please…”_

The woman’s voice grew fainter and more muffled as she went on, desperately trying to convince this “Alex” person to help her. I slowly walked ahead of Hodek, who looked like he wanted to stop me but also didn’t want to make any sort of scene. I got a better view of who was before us; some redheaded girl had a bloody cleaver in her grip, and was frozen with fear. Eventually, something in her seemed to change, and a familiar sensation manifested itself in the back of my mind. I could barely make it out, but it looked as if her eyes had turned yellow. She skipped up to one of the cops, tapped him on the shoulder, and said, “Mister Officer?”

When they turned around, she took that as a sign to hack their head clean off. I stepped back, shocked at how easily it had been done. I didn’t see Jeff’s face, but his hand in my shoulder told me all I needed to know.

“We should go,” he whispered. I hesitantly nodded, my eyes still on the gory scene that was playing out. I took one step back, then another, and then followed Hodek back to the trapdoor.


	18. Chapter 18

“Oh, my  _ god. _ What the hell was that?! Do you know who that was?”

Jeff scoffed. “Depends who you’re talking about. You know, I haven’t visited the old cabin in these woods for months, but I’m willing to bet that Clockwork bitch is still locked up in there with her little prisoner. Alex, she said her name was…?”

“Clockwork? I don’t think you told me about her.” I frowned, looking at the crushed remains of what was our takeout before we started running. He just shrugged.

“Didn’t think I had to. Trust me, she’s not exactly a good topic of conversation if I’m concerned. I’ve got nothing but complaints. Hope she still got arrested,” he added with a laugh. He tossed a knife from one hand to the other, then eyed the wall behind me calculatingly. Without another word, he threw it like a dart so that it landed within an  _ inch _ of where my head was. I looked at him, jumpy and with a skipped heartbeat. He raised an eyebrow.

“What? I never miss.”

“Nice to know,” I said without an ounce of sincerity. He didn’t seem to mind. Instead of pushing it any further, I dug into the bottom of the takeout bag and found one of the fortune cookies still intact.  _ At least there’s this. _ As I enjoyed what couldn’t possibly have been considered a dinner, I managed to get a peek at what my fortune said.

_ “You should pay more attention to your surroundings. What’s in a name?” _

[JEFF]

We both knew we couldn’t make it a habit to get Bú Xìng for dinner more than once. The cashier would probably have quit if we walked in there a second time, with blood on our hands to boot.

We did it anyway.

Come on, it was convenient. My dignity had incidentally reached an all time low, and we couldn’t spot many other places around. It was only a matter of time before the rest of the food at “home” went bad, though, so we made sure to do what we could with it. At a certain point, I tried convincing him to break the chain and at least  _ look _ for something else, but he wouldn’t budge on this. Which didn’t help, because I was starting to grow sick of only lo mein and potstickers.

To my surprise, Max didn’t seem to be bothered by the whole  _ death of an innocent man _ thing anymore. He might have just forgotten it. Maybe it warranted more of a reaction when he was still in the moment, and afterward he simply blocked it out of his mind. All I knew was that now, he was set on something else. I’m not sure if I need to explain what that something would be; whenever I left at night to get some fresh air or find a new neighborhood, he’d always be dead focused on the… _ borrowed _ computer and typing various things into the browser’s search bar. He always seemed to come up empty handed, even if it looked to me like there was a lot of information he could have worked with. He didn’t pay attention to me when I suggested anything, so eventually I just stopped trying and went about my own business.

Which was another thing; It was strange to notice right after I entered the hideout every day, but the fog was still there. Any time we went out, I wouldn’t feel as much stinging as I’d expected. Going back in was a different story; it was like letting out a breath I didn’t know I was holding, or turning on the air conditioner when you get home in the middle of August. Everything felt so much cleaner and softer than outside; if I wanted to help myself at all I would need to remember to bring my bandana with me more.

Today, he was sitting in the middle of the floor—odd place for someone like him—and clacking up a storm, trying to find  _ something.  _ He didn’t look up at me, didn’t say a word. Not even a much-appreciated “welcome back,” like he usually would have given me. My eyebrows knit.

“You okay there?”

He stopped dead, then carried on with his vigorous browsing. “Uh. Yeah. Sorry, I’m just trying to—”

“Nah, it’s fine. You just look kind of…well,  _ really  _ stressed. More than normal.”

I wasn’t exactly lying. His face had gone pale, though that could have just been the light of the computer. I couldn’t see through his mask, but I was certain that if I could, his eyes would have been bloodshot. He hadn’t looked at much else for a couple of days now.

“I’m okay. You know, I realized recently that all this time I’ve been spending in here…it’s done something to sever my connection with my family. No more of that. But that’s nice of you to worry about me, Hodek.”

_ Like I’d believe you’re okay. _

I sighed and walked over, sitting down behind him and facing the laptop. I threw my arms around his shoulders, leaning towards the screen so I could better see what he was doing. After a moment he held one of my hands underneath the fabric of my sweater. He touched my downturned wrist distractedly, as if affirming to himself that I was there. His hands were calloused (not nearly as much as mine, of course) and it was funny how much that surprised me. But I didn’t move. I didn’t want to try remembering the last time I had real, honest human contact. Not just grabbing someone’s arm to prevent them from getting away, not an accidental brush of the skin. Something about this was definitely different. I doubted he was really thinking about it, though.

[MASQ]

I could barely think about  _ anything  _ but this for a solid five minutes. I wasn’t exactly comfortable with how close he was getting to me, even if he didn’t mean much by it. There was this strange tension to the scene, like at any point something might snap. Or worse, he’d just end up walking away and I would have gotten all worked up over nothing. Well, yes, I held his hand. What else was I supposed to do? I might have started shaking otherwise. My senses were pulled back to reality when he gently leaned his head against mine, just grazing the side of my neck. I paused and then continued typing.

“Pinky kid song,” I thought to myself in sync with the words shot out by the keyboard.

_ Maybe he’s an accomplished musician now. _

No dice. The whole room was deathly silent, except for the sound of Hodek breathing right by my ear.

“Summer patrols.”

_ If someone got caught, they might mention a location in an article. _

Nothing. Hodek shifted himself so that he had somehow gotten even closer to me, and scratched the side of his face. “Mm. Is there something in particular you’re trying to find?”

I glanced to the side, let out a small sigh, and opened up the browser’s history. “What do these look like to you.”

“Fair, fair. But it  _ still  _ looks like you could use some help.”

“I really doubt you’d be able to help with this,” I muttered, resting my head on a hand. Hodek reached forward and drummed his fingers on the keys light enough to not press any of them.

“Hey, I’ve done some computer work in the past. Not as much as my brother, of course, but I’ve picked a few things up. Like  _ not _ including ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ in your searches like a middle-aged woman.” He pointed to one of the lines of text I’d entered previously with a poorly disguised smirk, and I scoffed.

“The great Jeff Hodek has worked a day in his life, has he?”

“Oh, you’re  _ really _ pushing it right now. Do you need a break? You’ve been at this day and night, you’ve barely eaten, and at this rate you’ll be shit out of luck because this thing will run out of battery.”

“I’ve _been_ breaking for too long. I need to get my act together, I-I need to find them. Just let me do this,” I said, my voice shaky. He raised an eyebrow and sat up, laying off of me. After a couple seconds, I turned my head the slightest bit.

“Alone.”

That seemed to get him. He was usually the one to ask for space, or time for himself. He slowly nodded, like the thought hadn’t occurred to him that I didn’t actually want to come here in the first place. It had been more of a refuge starting out. The only place I could have stayed for the night. Suddenly, despite it all, I felt bad for saying that as harshly as I did. He looked like he’d comply either way, which is what he ended up doing. He shrugged, stood up, and went to the kitchen to get a knife for tonight’s outing. His features held an extra trace of defeat as he stuck it in the wall just to make sure it wouldn’t bend, and started walking towards the trapdoor.

I set the computer aside and stood up.

“Hodek,” I said, just loud enough that he could hear me. He turned around expectantly, and whatever I was about to say dissolved in my mouth. I stared blankly for a moment before shaking my head.

“I still—” I began, but caught myself right as the word could slip out.

“…I still admire you,” I settled with eventually. After a painful silence, he started laughing. Not a cruel one; just a quiet chuckle or two. His face almost seemed to soften.

“Not going to go through with the L-word, huh?” He said, just short of teasing me. He held up a hand to cut me off before I could respond. “No. It’s okay. I get it. I… _ admire _ you, too, Max.”

The way he phrased that was oddly comforting. I nodded and folded my arms, gaze dropping to the ground. We both stayed where we were for a good minute. Then, he started towards me and pocketed his knife.

“Do you want me to kiss you again?”

My hands twitched at that, and without a second thought I replied, “That would be nice, yes.”

He laughed a second time, even more softly than before, and lifted my chin to kiss me. It was a lot more short-lived than I would have liked it, but he didn’t shy away when I held his face and pulled him closer. So I knew it was worth it to him, too.

As we pulled apart from each other, my mind also seemed to pull apart from everything I had just been doing for the past however many days. I noticed Hodek wasn’t smiling (aside from the obvious) and at this point it didn’t bother me. I felt something click in my head as I remembered who happened to live nearby.

“You know who we should pay a visit to sometime?”

He tilted his head. “…who?”

“Those two girls in the log cabin. Give them a scare, find out what their whole deal even is.”

Hodek paused, and then a thoughtful grin spread across his face.

“I was thinking it’s about time you upgraded from assistant, to  _ partner. _ ”


	19. Chapter 19

I knew he couldn’t stand to wait for very long. Before, I assumed he’d one this before but from the looks of it, the thought hadn’t even occurred to him. He told me to handle all of the snooping around, since actually fighting when necessary didn’t seem to be my strong suit. I wasn’t about to argue with that. I felt tempted to ask him why he never thought of simply killing this Natalie he hated so much, but I was smart enough to know that now wasn’t the time for that. We made plans to “strike” at exactly midnight. Or at least, when the clock on the laptop said it was.

“Natalie isn’t  _ just  _ some annoying girl who tried to drive me out of these woods with some cheap acidic gas, Max. She’s an annoying girl who also happens to have a cleaver and years of arson, murder,  _ whatever _ on her hands. She’s been living cozily, out of sight from the police, which is one thing more than what you could say for us. So…I want you to be careful. Okay?” Hodek raised an eyebrow at some spare gloves he’d found in a box in the training room, then looked to me as he strapped them on. I closed my eyes, trying to retain that information.

“…okay.”

“We’re just going to slip in and out of the house before she even notices. Well,  _ you  _ will. I might have to keep her at bay.”

“Can I ask exactly what you’re planning to say if she sees you?” I asked, double-checking for my pliers. I’d taken them off my belt a long time ago and only over the last couple of days thought to keep them near me again.

“Like you said. Give her a scare. I’m not really looking to kill her friend in there, but it wouldn’t hurt to make her think I will.”

I recalled the first and only time we had seen the two, and furrowed my eyebrows. “Did you hear the way Natalie yelled at her in the street? I’d hardly say they’re  _ friends. _ ”

Jeff paused and gave it some thought. “You’re right. They’re probably dating. Come on, let’s get out of here before it hits 11:45.”

* * *

For a moment, as he helped me out of the ground I could see a trace of appreciation in his features. Something about the way he was acting right now had changed. It didn’t last long, though, as he brushed himself off and looked in the direction of where this mysterious cabin in the woods was supposed to be. He gave me a short sideways glance as if to make sure I was still there.

“Remember the plan, mask-boy. No talking. Avoid the leaves. The twine, pliers, whatever the fuck you have on you  _ stays _ on you until I say otherwise. Once you see the little twat, stay behind me. And we are having pizza tonight, not your local Chinese garbage. We have that every night. Got me?”

I nodded wordlessly, and he grinned. Not like he had a choice.

“Great.”

And we dove under the cover of the trees. Now and then I’d see him check back on me, which was fair because he was moving  _ fast _ . Every time he did, something resembling grief clouded his face, and he’d shake his head and keep forward. Eventually, he seemed to spot a clearing and stopped in his tracks. I just barely kept myself from running into him as he reached into his back pocket and pulled out a serrated knife, slowly stepping out into view.

And so we waited.

And we waited.

And we waited until five more minutes passed and a girl in a bloody, fur-lined jacket emerged from the other side of the forest with a plastic bag in hand.

_ So that’s Natalie. _

At first, I was concerned Jeff couldn’t see her, because he was definitely a little hesitant to get her attention. But as she was just about to open the door to the cabin, he spoke.

“Might wanna be careful there. Don't want anybody escaping, now would we?”

She turned her head slightly, looking beyond aggravated. “The hell do you want, Jeff. I'm busy.”

“Doing what? Buying clothes? Tired of that coat always weighing you down now?”

“None of your fucking business, smiley. Now go away.”

He sighed and pulled the knife into clear view. “Well, that's not very polite at  _ all _ . And I'm not leaving until I know what's going on here. Or at least, until your little prisoner's dead.”

She whirled around, drawing a cleaver respectively. I noticed she didn’t even have both of her eyes; one of them was replaced by what seemed to be a still-functioning pocket watch.

“You're one to talk. You've got some new girl every week now. Don't see you just touring them around.”

“But the difference is, I _killed_ them. You've got some sort of sweetheart in that cabin of yours, I'm thinking.” He sighed again with a twisted sense of superiority, clicking his tongue. “I know you, Nats. You're not the secretive type. It's just not like you to do this.” He twiddled the knife between his fingers, like he was itching for the opportunity to use it. I doubted he really knew her at all; the way he said that sounded more like a ploy than anything, but I wasn’t going to talk. I was still waiting for my _go_ in the shadows.

“You've got 10 seconds to let me do the job. If not, I've got a masked wonder-boy behind me who could get past you just as easy.”

_ He’s so sweet. _

Natalie narrowed her eyes and tilted her head. After a moment, she muttered, “You got  _ Tim?” _

“Jesus Christ—you know, nevermind. You'll see soon enough. That is, unless you wanna come to your senses soon. 5 seconds.”

She sneered, bringing her cleaver up to her chest. “Suck a dick, Hodek.”

Hodek paused a second, almost like he was at a loss for words. That little façade died sooner than I thought it would. He spoke quietly.

“If you were waiting for a signal,  _ Masquerade, _ those brave words did it.”

I took a moment to arm myself, then charged at the girl at full speed. He followed suit.

In all honesty, throughout the brawl while Jeff was probably fueled by bloodlust and throwing strings of curses at her in his mind, all I could really think was,  _ He called me by my real name. Thoughtful. _

Of course, I could still focus. It was easier than I thought to get past her, while she was distracted by him. I noticed the door was actually opened, and a sliver of light was shining through. I could catch just a glimpse of a room filled with…

_ Clocks? _

Making sure she couldn’t see me, I slipped inside and surveyed the room around me. There was a window to my left, and four doorways—three of which led to even smaller parts of the cabin. It seemed this really was as tiny as it looked.

Unless that fourth hall led to something bigger.

I looked curiously into the darkness, not expecting much. After all, the cabin’s walls ended about four feet from where I was standing. But then why did it look as if this tunnel-like  _ thing _ went on for miles?

I decided against checking too far into it; that would put a damper on the search. Besides, as far as I was concerned, we didn’t really want this girl’s prisoner dead just yet.  _ Just get in and out, find as much as you can. _

A full minute passed before I even noticed there were two body bags stored in the first room to my left.

_ Oh. Did she…? _

I bolted to the smaller-looking one and unzipped it as fast as I could, all too aware that my time was running out. The corpse must have been there for almost a year now; its flesh had already rotten away, only a couple locks of hair were visible on its head, and what I guessed were a hundred gashes in its stomach, chest, face, limbs, you name it, had dried a long time ago. I would have gagged if I could afford to. Jeff must have been growing tired of distracting her by now.

The second body was larger, and a bit heftier. The moment I saw that its head had been crushed completely, I lost the will to explore further. But I had to, and besides, what could possibly make it worse? I unzipped it all the way, not bothering to look anymore until l had the full picture. Turns out, the rest of the body was also no good to identify. Everything looked like it’d been used for  _ something. _ There was fresh blood all over their arms and neck, even staining most of…

_ The clothes. _

I’d recognize that uniform anywhere. Without a second thought I closed up both bags and made for the window. It opened easily, without much friction, which I thought was odd. There wasn’t much time to think anything right now, though.

I slid out, ran to the front, and saw that Jeff was winning. Not so surprising, but also not ideal for right now. I couldn’t let him know I had any connection to whoever was inside that cabin.

As he struck Natalie down and was about to open the door, I tapped his shoulder. “Wait. Look at the sky.”

He glanced up at the dawn above him, and let out a small groan.

“We should head back. You've scared her enough already, if you do anything more she'll never leave the cabin again.”

He looked over to where Natalie was standing. Her hand was twitching towards the doorknob in desperation. He sighed.

“Fine. You're only getting lucky, clock girl,” he called in her direction, “because Max here's got twice the restraint I do. Be grateful. And don't you fucking  _ dare _ tell your little girl what happened here.”

Natalie's good eye widened as far as it could. “H-how did you kn—”

Before she could finish, he turned around and stalked away, dragging me along with him. When we were a safe distance from the cabin’s clearing, he gave me a thankful look.

“Nice job. Guess you really  _ are _ good at what you do.”

“Stop talking, it's literally almost 5:00.” I found it in me to laugh, but I didn’t feel so great about what had just happened.

_ Someone from my family went to get that girl. _

_ And they didn’t make it back. _


	20. Chapter 20

[JEFF]

I don’t care to admit things like this, but it’s kind of necessary, which is why I’ve done it more than once. Natalie didn’t go down easy. I felt some old gash in my chest open back up after that fight, and it hurt like hell. Of course I wasn’t going to show it around Max. From the look on his face, he had a lot more to worry about. So I left him alone about it for a little while. I found myself wondering how no authorities had thought to look in this forest for us—not just for Max and I, but Clockwork and her little friend, too. She got away once, sure. But would the police really stop after one attempt to contain her?

The days went on as usual again. I collected some bandages and medicine from the now-empty houses we’d visited (a perk of the job) and healed myself.  _ Discreetly _ , mind you. The time I didn’t spend in bed was either for coffee or helping Max with his “research.” From then on he used the computer pretty sparingly, though, since it was low enough on battery to last us maybe a couple more days. If it weren’t for another person staying here with me, I probably would have felt useless since I could only perform less physically taxing chores. I simply hoped he couldn’t tell that I wasn’t doing so great.

Some day, on a god-knows-what-month afternoon I walked into what could have been called the main hall of our little home and saw that at the computer, Max was completely  _ out. _ His head hung, his arm was leaning on five or so keys without so much as an attempt to lift it, and he almost looked dead. My hand started twitching. I made my way over and crouched down next to him, lightly tapping his head with the hilt of my knife.

“You okay there, buddy…?”

No response.

I leaned closer to see if his eyes were still open when I heard a tiny whisper. It didn’t sound like his voice; it was way too quiet and distant, and seemed almost distorted from  _ something. _ I pursed my lips and rested my head in a hand, waiting to see if I could hear it again or if I was just finally losing it.

Sure enough, nearly five minutes later the same voice coming from inside his head said,

_ “Oh, you could make it seem like an accident. Such fun! And it’ll get you to where…” _

My blood ran cold at that pause. Not only that, I swore I’d recognize that voice anywhere. Before I could even stand up, I heard a slightly louder,

_ “Don’t you think it’s rude to listen in on other people’s conversations, boy?” _

“Get out of his head. Now,” I said through gritted teeth. “I’m  _ not _ in the mood for your shit, especially when—”

_ “Yes, yes,  _ especially  _ when things are going so well between you two! Don’t worry, Jeffrey, I don’t believe I could be putting any of that in jeopardy. Not by simply helping a friend out. What do you think, Maximus?” _

With that, Max jolted awake and fell back, breathing heavily. His face remained blank, and he only paused to take in where he was when I folded my hand over his. I was a careful distance away besides that, and his gaze fixed onto me and shifted into focus like a camera.

“…oh. Hodek. There you are. Did something happen while I was asleep?”

He seemed to notice my expression and raised an eyebrow. “Are you okay?”

“What did he tell you this time,” I asked, exasperated. Whatever kind of look he was trying to give me, it wasn’t working.

“He—” he cut himself off with a curl of his fist, and I gave an attempt at narrowing my eyes. Max shook his head, slowly, almost like he was trying to reassure himself of something.

“No. ‘He’ didn’t tell me anything. Who are you even talking about?”

“I think you know exactly who. I know you’re lying, by the way. I’ll ask you again: what did he tell you to do?”

“Hodek, just…drop it. I’m fine, I don’t know what you’re saying, nobody told me to do anything. Are you  _ worried _ about me? Again?”

I’m not sure how that did it, but somehow, he managed to shut me up with that. He pinched the bridge of his nose underneath his mask, seeming almost relieved.  _ Did he say that just so I would stop asking? If he didn’t know me well enough already… _

“Whatever you think you heard was probably nothing. I’m going to get back to work.”

“Won’t the battery run out on that thing soon?”

He froze, his hands hovering over the keyboard. His eyes widened like he’d been caught in a lie.

“…I’ll find a way to recharge it,” he settled on, busying himself once more. I felt something crawling under my skin, though I knew nothing was there. I was fine about all the hesitance to open up before. But keeping such an obvious secret from me  _ now  _ just didn’t sit right. I reluctantly left him alone with the computer, not too eager to take my eyes off of him.

* * *

One of the last nights I went out in those woods was one I wanted to forget more than anything. Nothing awful happened; nobody even died. But it was a strange, different kind of awful.

I’d been fighting Natalie again. She seemed just a little more unhinged than usual, just a little more willing to kill me than in all of our other…well,  _ disputes _ . All I did was try to kill that prisoner of hers. Hell, she’d just been wandering around the forest, alone, like she was some lost girl trying to find her way back home. Definitely far from defenseless; she hit me in the eye with a rock. But it didn’t look like Natalie even wanted her around anymore. So I decided I’d do her a little favor, her  _ and  _ me.

Then the infamous Clockwork swooped in, changed her mind about the girl, and “killed” her right in front of me. When I tried making sure she’d done it properly, she cut me off like I had been at this business for only a couple of days.

“It’s done. Now move. Scram. Kindly  _ piss off.” _

Of course I knew she was lying. Didn’t seem like I had a choice about leaving, though. The look on her face might have burned me if I stood there for much longer. I groaned and walked back into the forest, trying to remember the path back home. But when I didn’t hear Natalie start to move as well, I felt like something even more was up. She was waiting for the other girl to get back on her feet.

I ducked behind a nearby tree and watched it all play out, with a swollen eye to boot. The redhead—Alex, I remembered—stayed silent for a few minutes. Natalie said gruffly, “You can get up now if you want, you little shit.”

_ Jesus. So much for a sweetheart. _

Alex immediately lifted herself off the ground and dug forest soil out of her eyes. She winced a couple of times in what I assumed to be pain, and once more at Natalie’s demeanor. She was facing the other way and looking towards the sky, teeth clenched and hands balled up into fists.

“You  _ lied!” _ She yelled into the air. Alex shuffled back, and so did I a bit.

“You knew this would happen. You fucking  _ knew! _ I should have skinned you alive!” Her voice was hoarse and tears seem to bead in her eyes. Alex slowly held out a hand and took one small step closer. “Nata—”

“It's Clockwork to you, dipshit.” Natalie turned around and made her way back to where Alex was standing. Alex blinked several times before weakly stuttering, “I-I was going to go straight—He just c-came at—I mean, I cou—”

“Please, go. I'll walk you home if you're that stupid. Just...please. You're not safe.” Natalie’s voice was cracked and filled with thinly-veiled rage. Alex looked down out of guilt, though I couldn’t guess as to why. "I'm sorry," she said, so quietly I could barely hear it. Her shoulders started silently heaving.

Before long Natalie seemed to break her façade and crushed her in a hug. Something in me shifted. I hated them both so much, but for a different reason now. I sat down, hugging my knees, and forced myself to watch.

Natalie started sobbing and Alex mumbled, “I'm so sorry,” over and over into her shoulder. Eventually, Natalie whispered, “Don't be  _ sorry _ . I—” she ran out of words for a moment. “…god, I'm so fucking awful. I'm messed up. I broke you. I left you. I almost  _ killed _ you. I let you break. I—”

“I love you. So much. God knows why, but…”

And suddenly they were happy.

It was so strange to see this. I wanted to leave right this second and forget those two idiots ever existed. But somehow, as I was about to get up I was jerked back to sit. Based on the brief look of panic in Natalie’s eye, I guessed that at least she heard me, but it faded as quickly as it came. They embraced and laughed and cried, and I finally left after entire minutes of convincing myself to snap out of it. I grumbled at nothing and tugged at the bottom of my sweater as if that was going to help anything.

It took way too much to rid myself of the idea that I wanted what they had.


	21. Chapter 21

[MASQ]

It was possible that at this point, Hodek would care if I told him what I saw in that cabin. Not the information that could be useful to him, but exactly whose body I’d recovered and what that meant for me. I wasn’t very willing to risk it either way. All I could do was hang back in the shadows, keep working, and wonder  _ why. _

_ Why would that Alex girl be important to them? To  _ us? _ What’s the luck that she happens to live just a couple hundred yards away from where I’m staying? Should we leave her and that Clockwork be, or risk everything to find out what’s going on? _

I hated being trapped inside. Hodek certainly wasn’t keeping me; on the occasion he’d glance back as he was about to leave, a strange sense of wistfulness in his eyes like he hoped one day I’d decide to tag along for once. No matter how much I actually wanted to, I just couldn’t. Partially because I wanted to be positive that nobody, whether they ended up dead or alive, would see me out there before the inevitable.

It was, frankly, very upsetting when I realized that Angus had tried to trick me again. What’s worse was that it worked. He’d gotten into my mind, pretended to be…somebody else, and persuaded me to put everything I had on the line in order to find my family. As if I hadn’t done that already. When Jeff woke me up and asked what  _ he _ had told me, something clicked inside my head, and I was suddenly very annoyed. Annoyed that once again, I’d been manipulated. Annoyed that this time, Angus had been right. I hoped that my lie was convincing enough, but from the looks of it, I needed to work on that area. Hodek didn’t look at me the same in the days to come, he didn’t even tell me what happened when he visited the cabin again. He just gave me another one of those wistful looks and went to bed.

Today, it was particularly warm for late autumn. Jeff had went out for the morning to take advantage of this. I gave him one last warning before he left, in case everything  _ really  _ went off the rails. I wasn’t entirely sure if he even heard me at that point. He looked at me funnily and muttered something about me being any more suspicious. I felt a pang of guilt and embarrassment; maybe this was a bad idea.

_ It will get better, Masquerade. Trust me. You just need that little dip to be able to see things right. _

Are you sure about that? A dip could turn into a valley. Or a canyon. It could last forever.

_ Nothing lasts forever. I’ve been around long enough to see that. _

The moment he set foot above ground, I heard panicked footsteps getting further and further from the trapdoor by the second, and I sighed, grabbing the nearly dead laptop and a blade of my own. I still had my pliers and twine with me, but just to be safe I felt that I should take something extra.

* * *

Obviously, I saw the officers long before they could spot me. It looked like they were about to head into Natalie’s side of the woods, which wasn’t ideal for us but it also didn’t give any indication that they knew about Hodek and me. There was one who seemed to be a novice; at least, none of the others paid him much attention and he didn’t exactly look like he knew what he was doing. I heard a voice in my mind, though I couldn’t tell whether it still belonged to me.

_ Now’s your chance. _

My arms tightened around the laptop, and my feet felt rooted (no pun intended) to the forest floor. I couldn’t do this. Not yet. Not without some extra push.

Well, let’s just say the demon in my head took care of that.

[JEFF]

I was out, about my own business, when  _ it _ supposedly happened. He’d told me to take another knife with me that day; hell, maybe even two. Gave some bullshit excuse of “oh, we have to be more careful nowadays, you might run into some trouble.” Something like that. And I was pretty suspicious of him long before that, but I wasn’t going to argue with extra protection. Unless it was some sort of plot to weigh me down, I couldn’t think of much harm that could come from it. So I just silently complied, and my worries melted away to be replaced by new ones as soon as I stepped out of the trapdoor.

There was a police car right outside of the forest, hood facing my way. It would be difficult not to spot, even though it was almost a quarter mile away. My heart started pounding like it never had in the past five years; I’d had run-ins with the cops, sure. But right now, considering what I had on my record, this was a matter or life or death for me. Possibly for both of us. I turned and bolted for the furthest town I could manage, deciding it was better to just leave Max underground than make a scene trying to get him out into the open.  _ He’s smart. He can get himself out of a mess like this if it comes his way. I’m not responsible for him, anyway. _

I paused, though my legs insisted that I keep running.

_ …but he’s my partner. _

I shook my head after a moment and kept at it. Maybe there  _ was _ no right thing to do here. Besides, with a good five minutes of running I was too exhausted to think about much more than the simple. I made a mental note to run more often so that when it came to saving my own skin I wouldn’t be drowning in sweat, and didn’t stop until I was almost out of the woods.

Pun not intended.

[MASQ]

The trapdoor came through, falling shut with a satisfying  _ crack _ that echoed through the trees. Unfortunately, making a lot of noise was what I was trying to avoid here. Fortunately, there was no way this officer would be able to escape without a) more than sufficient climbing skills or b) backup. I felt slightly less guilty than I probably should have, but guilt wouldn’t help me here. What I needed to do was find Hodek, set apologies aside for later, and  _ run. _

I heard muffled yells from behind me as I set out in whatever direction Hodek would most likely go in—in this case, away from the police cruiser. The further I went, the more the gravity of the situation seemed to sink in. This was it. Hodek would either believe me that it was an accident, or hate me for the rest of his days.

I didn’t have to wonder about which one it would be for long, because I ran into him (almost literally) while he was on his way back. He held out his arm to halt me, and I nearly broke a rib colliding with it. He grabbed both my shoulders and looked me in the eyes.

“Why are you running out here, and why now.”

“Police,” I breathed.

“Yeah, so I guessed, but what could—”

“No, you don’t understand. They came looking for us, I had to trap them under the door—”

“You  _ what?!” _

“There’s no time to explain, just go!” I shoved him forward and started running myself, not bothering to look back. Hodek tried a couple times to string words into sentences, and failed in all instances. Eventually, he just followed without question as we made for the town closest to us. At this point, I was holding onto the laptop with one arm and hoping it would fall. I heard one loud crack in the air, and felt something scorch part of my arm. I let out a yelp, tightening my grip on the computer, only to look down and realized there was a smoking hole going all the way through its side.

_ Whatever they were aiming for, they certainly got something out of that,  _ I found myself thinking, despite the circumstances.

A couple more seconds passed and I recognized something in the distance; as it came into view, I realized it was one of the homes we’d visited and cleared through. I would have been relieved if I had the energy. We flattened ourselves behind the house, gasping for air. My throat burned, and my arms desperately clutched the computer. Hodek drew a knife—thank god he listened to me and brought more than one—and took a quick glance behind us before turning back to me.

“Alright. Looks like we’ve got time  _ now _ , so tell me what the everloving fuck you did.”

I hesitated and sank to my knees, under the guise of still being out of breath.  _ I really need to think some of my lies through before just spitting them out. _ “I…I was going to find something to charge this,” I began, weakly tapping the laptop. “And I don’t know how, but those policemen spotted me and started asking what I was doing in the woods. I-I knew that I couldn’t just run from them, because they’d go after me—”

“Great observation! Too bad that’s happening anyways,” he muttered.

“…so I had to take one of them to the trapdoor. The good news is, he’s stuck there until the rest help him. The bad news…” I trailed off as the sound of various men shouting got louder and louder from inside the forest. “Screw it. The bad news is we’re  _ dead _ if we stay here any longer, let’s go.” I grabbed Hodek by the sleeve and opened the door, which surprisingly hadn’t been sealed, bolting inside and locking it behind us.

_ These people really need to get better at their jobs. _

Hodek gripped my hand abrasively, as if convincing me not to go any further. “You do realize that they might just find us easier like this—”

“Not if we’re any good at hiding. They’ll search the house, give up, and look somewhere—”

_ “Police! Open up!” _

I looked around, blood pumping like nothing else, and spotted a large wardrobe-like thing off to the side. Without a second thought I dragged him inside there with me, closing it shut and remaining completely still in the dark.

_ We’re absolutely fucked. _

When they finally burst through the door, I shut my eyes and held tightly onto his arm, which he didn’t object to. I realized he was probably just as scared as me in that moment, if not  _ more _ . We stood there, with nothing but a couple of knives to protect us, and waited.

And waited.

_ “Oh, we have a couple of smart boys here, don’t we?” _

The voice of one of the officers started coming dangerously close to our little hiding spot. The guy rapped on the dresser’s door with his knuckles, and Jeff slowly grabbed its handles from the inside, holding it closed. I heard a disappointed grunt or two. 

And then a sickening  _ slice _ .

Then another.

And soon the air was filled with muffled yells of fear and agony. Someone was doing Hodek’s job for him; not that he seemed to mind, of course. Here and there I heard a couple of laughs, a completely different voice holding the sort of relish in killing that Hodek had lost a long time ago. In the eventual silence that followed, slow, haunting footsteps caused the floorboards to creak and seemed to be coming straight towards us. But whoever they belonged to didn’t try and open the wardrobe. I could only guess as to what they were thinking right then. After a short moment of nothing, they finally spoke in a singsong voice.

_ It’s her. _

“You’re  _ welcome,  _ Hodek,” she said smugly. He didn’t respond. Clockwork sighed, running the tip of her weapon across the wood as if trying to scare us, or draw us out.

“I’d offer you a place to stay, but…come on. Trying to murder my girlfriend, more than once? That’s where I draw the line.” She chuckled to herself. “Ha.  _ Draw the line. _ ” She didn’t sound the least bit angry, despite what she was saying. I wondered what had happened between them to make her so giddy at this situation. When Hodek stayed silent, she sighed again and began walking away.

“You probably should’ve left those woods a long time ago, anyways. Kinda had it coming, if you ask me. Well… _ au revoir,  _ Jeff Hodek.” She paused. “And company.”

And she was gone. By the sliver of light hitting our faces from a crack in the door, I could see Hodek was beyond pissed. He looked more stressed out than ever, his face now deathly pale behind the scars and his brow furrowed beyond belief. My breaths were thin and shaky as I silently thanked whatever god was up there. But before I could say anything to Hodek, he released the handle he had on the door and stuck his foot in front of me, causing me to trip and fall out onto the floor. If the laptop wasn’t broken before, it sure as hell was now.

_ There it goes. The one thing that could’ve helped me find them. _

I sat still there for a moment. After what felt like forever, I started helplessly gathering the chipped remains of the computer in my arms. I couldn’t close my eyes for one second. My hands shook with regret. Why did I even do this?

_ Because you’re one step closer to everything you’ve ever wanted. Have you forgotten already? _

I imagined the trip would be a little more pleasant than this.

_ Ah. Now I see. You’ve let your little shelter turn you soft. Maybe this would go easier without that companion of yours— _

Stop it. I won’t get rid of Hodek. He may be furious at me, but he’s right to be. I’ve ruined everything.

_ For a reward, Masquerade, for a  _ reward.  _ You keep losing sight of what’s truly important. _

Leave me alone. I don’t need this right now.

_ …fine. _

I let out a shudder of a sigh, refusing to look Hodek’s way. He wasn’t exactly doing anything, contrary to what I expected. Something in me almost wished he’d start yelling at me, or at least ask me why in the world I led the police right to our home. I wanted to be held accountable, for once. But he didn’t do anything. He didn’t even bother sitting down. Just folded his arms and waited for me to stand back up.

“…well?” I asked, my voice barely able to carry in the air. After what felt like hours, he combed his hair back with one hand and stepped out beside me.

“Well, I don’t think I’ll ever be able to forget that we just got kicked out of our home by both the cops  _ and  _ a lesbian serial killer, to start off.”

“I-I’m sorry.”

“For what? Think carefully,” he said, a noticeable trace of venom in his words. I didn’t want to admit to myself that he knew something like this would happen, but I had little choice. Still, I kept my mouth shut and stood up feebly, dropping some pieces of computer on the ground and staring at them in defeat. He continued.

“I suppose I could use this as an opportunity to say, ‘when everything goes to shit, you just have to get back up,’ or instill some little moral in you. But I’m not exactly in the mood for that right now. Let’s just go.”

“I didn’t mean for this to happen, I swear.” I didn’t budge. Hodek scoffed and rubbed his forehead.

“You know, if you don’t start moving, I could just leave without you. It’s not like it would make much of a difference at this point.”

I flinched at that. I knew deep down that he didn’t really mean it, but it still hurt. And knowing him, he probably  _ would _ have gone on his own if I didn’t listen. I took one step, and then another. We reluctantly left the house and set out to find a new place to stay.


	22. Chapter 22

_Who are these people? Where did they just take me? They don’t seem to actually know who I am._

“Don’t cry, little boy. You’re lost, aren’t you?”

I wiped a stray tear from my eye and looked around. I got the feeling I shouldn’t be answering that question. My hands were trembling, and in my head I was screaming at myself to get up and run as far away from here as possible. But whoever these _freaks_ were, they’d caught me. They could catch me again if I wasn’t fast enough. The girl to my right asked an invisible someone, “Hey, what's this one's name?”

Before I could respond, I felt a hand on my shoulder and jumped where I sat.

“His name is Masquerade.” It was the same voice I had heard before.

_No, my name is Max._ But I was too scared and confused to argue. “W-who are you...?” I managed, gazing around for any kind of answer.

They all responded at the same time; “Family.”

An unpleasant lump was beginning to grow in my throat. This had to be a mistake.

“Please…I can’t be who you’re looking for. I think you have—”

My Elder, face still shrouded in shadow, interrupted with a bright and cheery tone. “Oh, this is no mistake! Don’t worry, we’ve been watching you for quite a long time. Now, you’re finally here—and just in time for your 10th birthday!”

My eyes widened. “How do you know about that?”

The girl in front of me placed her hands on her hips, as if the answer should be obvious enough. “We’re your _family,_ Masquerade. And we care. Isn’t that what families do?”

“Yes, but—”

“We’ll escort you to your room. You can think about it there.”

I flinched away from them, scrambling back in the chair. “My _room_ is back _home._ ”

A teenage boy, whose name had been too weird to remember, sighed and crouched down so our eyes were level. “Look. I know this is scary for you. We were all scared when we first came here. But eventually, you’ll understand.”

His voice seemed to sink in volume, and soon it was as if I were being buried alive. I started to panic; everything around me was being enveloped in some strange substance. It felt almost like cotton. My head snapped up and suddenly, the vision melted away to reveal a pitch black night.

I was laying in Hodek’s arms. We’d been hiding in a corner of some apartment complex underneath the night sky. It had all been a dream. I was safe.

_From what?_

[JEFF]

We arrived at the other side of the forest by evening time and decided to rest near a large building right in front of it. The police car was gone; I couldn’t begin to guess as to how. Or _why,_ for that matter. Either way, we wouldn’t be spotted here and on the unlikely occasion where we were, most people would’ve assumed we were just homeless. Not that they’d be wrong.

I sighed, fingers brushing the scars I’d given myself on my face countless times. The stars were coming into sight about now. It would’ve been pretty enough to distract me if our problems weren’t as big as they were now. Max had fallen asleep soon after we settled here. After a brief debate with myself about whether he was even worth my time anymore, I dragged him by the shoulders and propped him up next to me so that if he managed to move he would be in my line of sight. This eventually turned into me simply hugging him to my chest and giving up any sense of pride I had before.

Minutes passed. Then those minutes turned to hours. Which turned into midnight, and the start of a new day. Just when I thought I might lose it again, Max finally woke up. I let him go as soon as I saw his eyes open and looked away to fixate my attention on some tree about fifty feet from us. He blinked once, noticed what had been going on here, and folded a hand over mine.

“Thank god. I thought you were still mad at me.”

I laughed. “Oh, sure. I’ve just been lashing out because of a lack of self-worth that I feel insi— _of course I’m still mad at you._ ”

He paused. “…oh.” He shifted the tiniest bit closer to me, which made it pretty impossible to not look at him with dignity. “Then why were you just hugging me?”

My arms itched. “I wouldn’t call it hugging. More like, ‘please don’t try and kill me in your sleep.’”

“I’ve never done that!”

“You can never be too sure. Besides, who knows what else that Angus bastard is going to try to take from us—uh, from _me._ ” I cleared my throat and subtly shoved Max off. “From me, is what I meant. Don’t you remember how he literally told you to kill me, and for a second you might have even considered it?”

“I—”

“That was a rhetorical question. The point is, I feel like I have to _restrain_ you from doing stupid shit now. For my own safety. Not because I…” I faltered, not wanting to continue that sentence. He didn’t push it. Just sighed and moved to sit next to me.

“So where do you suppose we go now?”

“I don’t know. _You_ think of something,” I mumbled into a sleeve, hugging my knees. “If I’m guessing right, the path in front of us leads directly to Natalie’s cabin. It would be so easy. We could just go in there, take both girls out and we’d have a new place.”

Max hesitated. “Then why don’t we?”

I sighed, wishing with all my heart that I didn’t have to say this. “Because she saved our asses. It just…it wouldn’t be fair.”

“Wait one second. _You_ , of all people, care about what’s fair or not? So you must have some sort of honor system.”

“Don’t you dare—”

“No, I respect that. I don’t think I’d do it either, considering what happened yesterday.”

I looked at him, exasperated. _Not one useful thing can this guy do on his own._ “You’re such a follower, you know that?”

“Well, what do you expect me to do? I’ve been one all my life. I followed my parents, I followed the Elder, I’m following you!”

“You followed that demon,” I said under my breath. He froze up, then glared at me.

“I told you, I did _not_ follow Angus. Do you really think I would put everything we had in jeopardy just for—”

“Yeah, I absolutely do. It’s not because you’re dumb or selfish, Max! It’s because Angus Grimville is a calculating, manipulative _dick._ He doesn’t stop until he gets what he wants. I fell for his tricks, and you sure as hell have, too.”

“What could he possibly want from me?”

“I don’t know yet! That’s why I have to restrain you, because I don’t know what you’re going to do if he gets inside your head! I’m scared!”

He looked taken aback. Clearly, he never expected me to admit anything like that. I took a deep breath and folded my arms.

“And _you’re_ a liar, and I’m still mad at you.”

After a while, Max lifted his mask to wipe an eye and then put it back on. “I’m scared too, you know.”

_“That’ll_ help us. Just…forget it. From now on, I don’t even want to hear you talk unless you have a plan.”

“Hodek, I—”

“No. Save it.”

He lifted a finger, and set it down again after a moment in defeat. What I didn’t bother saying was that in truth, his voice was almost starting to frighten me. He’d been mumbling nonsense in his sleep, I didn’t know what to think now that his head was on straight. Some of what he’d said seemed harmless enough. It was like he was reliving something that happened long ago. But what stuck with me was the very first thing I heard in his little daze:

Don’t cry, little boy. You’re lost, aren’t you?

_We’re lost._

“We’re lost, Max.”

From the look on his face, he recognized where I’d gotten that idea from. But he kept his mouth shut, eventually leaning back onto me as if trying to fall asleep again. To be fair, I considered joining him. My worst nightmares would have been more bearable than this.


	23. Chapter 23

Two more days passed and surprisingly, he kept to his word. Well, really _my_ word. I felt an odd sense of satisfaction rising in me with every second of silence that went by. It was definitely more lonely, not having someone to really talk to. But at least the guy could shut up when he was told.

We started passing through some old towns that I’d actually been to before. Somebody went pretty heavy with the police tape; apparently, this area of the state didn’t have law enforcement sufficient enough to catch one murderer on the loose. I would have laughed if that murderer wasn’t me. One day, Max nudged me in the arm and pointed to an old, metal shack in the middle of a dump. A sudden pang of grief hit me. It was the place I’d abandoned months ago, before I even met him. After a moment, I shook my head and kept walking, while Max just shrugged.

“You know, I heard libraries are kind of like a haven if you’re homeless. Maybe we could try that out…?”

I gave it some thought. “I guess we could _try._ But do you really think people like us would be able to get away with going someplace like that every day?”

“I didn’t say we had to go to the same one. Besides, I think I could pull off a ‘stuffy college student’ look well enough.”

“You haven’t even been to college.”

“Do you want me to help or not?”

That kind of shut my argument down. I sighed and nodded. “Fine. You don’t happen to know where one could be, so you?”

He paused, then turned around and looked back up the street we’d just walked down. He seemed to be doing some form of mental calculation, and came to an eventual, “Yes. Not too far from here, just a couple blocks down. The only problem might be that both of us have been here before, right?”

“I guess.”

“But nobody should recognize us during the day. Unless…” he stared at my face intently, went through a variety of doubtful expressions, and then fiddled with a shirt sleeve. “Eh, we’ll be fine. Come on.”

* * *

 We reached the one he had seen earlier soon enough, and decided I was going to wait outside. It dawned on me just then that while both of us were something of a mess from the past couple of days, Max looked far more presentable than me. Besides, there wasn’t so much of a chance that people would pick him out from a crowd and guess that he was working for a serial killer; let alone _being_ one himself.

As he was about to enter the building, a sudden realization crossed my mind.

“Wait.” I grabbed his shoulder and pulled him back. He looked at me expectantly.

_Does he think I’m going to apologize?_

“…first of all, somebody is definitely going to recognize you with that mask on.”

“I was going to take it off as soon as I got inside.”

“Good. Second, what are you even going to get in there? A full-length novel on how _not_ to get killed on the run?”

His eyes read disappointment, but his voice didn’t show that in the slightest. “I get what you’re trying to say, but the thing is, there might actually be something like that here. Just give me time to look.”

I searched him for any other discernible emotion and found nothing. _Dammit. He’s getting good at that._ “…I guess. Don’t be too long, okay?”

“I’ll take that as you already miss me. Okay,” he said, without an ounce of mischief in his voice. I wondered how he could say some of the things he did with such a straight face. Did he really believe them? As he walked into the building, already crafting some sort of façade for himself and removing his mask, I felt an itching at my throat. Maybe he was just better at lying than I thought.

_Has he lied about his feelings for me?_

I crossed my arms, biting my lip until it almost bled.

_No. No, why do I even care? He royally screwed me over less than a week ago. All to find his stupid “family,” I’ll bet. I don’t care about what he thinks, I don’t care about_ him _. And he shouldn’t care about me._

I let my mind sit in that for a while. The more I thought it, the more my chest seemed to ache.

_…I didn’t sign up for this shit._

Max came back out just five minutes later, holding a map, three books, and a small laminated card. He looked relatively pleased with himself. I raised an eyebrow inquiringly.

“So…?”

“I think I found something,” he responded vaguely. He dumped his loot onto a nearby bench and sorted through it, determined. I noticed he had a new scent on his hands, and lifted one of them to inspect. “What did you do in there?”

“It’s hand sanitizer, Hodek. I’m not an animal.”

“Well, I don’t—”

“We’re not doing this right now. Just…look.” He ripped his hand from me and brought out the map to rest on top of his stack.

“Having one of these is just common sense. It’s got a layout of this town, plus the three adjacent to it.” He unfolded it to reveal exactly what he’d said—four towns, all with the same sort of features, one right next to the other. After I’d gotten a good look, he flipped it over.

“And the back is completely blank, so we can write down anything from _these,_ ” he said, gesturing to the books in front of us, “in case we need to return them.”

“And we’ll write on it with…?”

Without so much as blinking he drew a small pen from out of nowhere and clicked it twice. I nodded, though inside I couldn’t help but feel like I was about to snap. _So I guess this is payback for saying that he can’t do anything on his own._

Instead of commenting anything else, I directed my attention to the books. Only one of them was thick enough to provide anything useful, and it was…

_“Runaway._ The kids’ book,” I said dryly, pressing two fingers to my forehead.

“Well, why not? I skimmed through it, looks like it has some pointers for us.”

“It’s about a twelve-year-old girl.”

“So?”

“So I don’t think she would be getting hunted down by the police for the same reasons as us. At least tell me there’s…” I shuffled through what we had, and came across _When All Hell Breaks Loose._ A real emergency survival book. I sighed with relief and set it aside to look at the last one in the pile.

“… _The Wide Window,_ by Lemony Snicket?” Instead of frustrated, I felt genuinely confused at that one. Max picked it up and took a glance at both sides with a sort of fondness in his eyes.

“I don’t know, I just never got to this one as a kid.” He responded to my exasperated look with, “What? It’s not like you can waste money at a library.”

“Unless you’re _fined_ for not returning books. You know that’s a thing, right?”

“Yeah, which is why this,” he said, flicking out what must have been a library card, “is on my mother’s email address. And she’s dead. Any fines will be directed to her inbox, which will never be opened.”

I was surprised into saying, “Well done,” to which he gave a soft smile. He didn’t utter another word after that for a solid five minutes, and I remembered with embarrassment that I’d told him not to talk if it wasn’t helping us forward. I fashioned a sort of makeshift handbag out of some torn cloth I found in a bush, and packed the things he found into it before setting off again.


	24. Chapter 24

Max blacked out yet again a couple days later, muttering the same nonsense as that other night. Soon enough, it became a common occurrence. I grew tired of it a lot faster than I thought I would. Every time he woke up, he was even more shaken and even more sweaty than before. He still kept his mouth shut around me, and I knew better than to ask about it.

We drew tidbits of helpful information from our books, while Max occasionally laid back and caught up on his little series to calm himself down. I bit my cheek and sighed at the tiny amount we  _ did  _ have written down, realizing very quickly that the bulk of them were just what plants you could eat if you’re stranded without food. Horrible ideas began crossing my mind before long. Sure, we were “prepared,” but what was that worth if we could be caught and arrested at any time?

I turned to Max on a hill just outside the woods. They were a lot larger than I’d thought initially; probably because I never bothered getting past the cabin and onto the other side. We were safe here for now. Far away from any other  _ things  _ that might have been living there, too.

“You keep dragging me in the same direction. Are you looking for something in particular?”

He didn’t respond. He didn’t even look at me, but I knew he heard. After a moment, I waved in front of his face, fed up.

“Hey. What’s going on in there? Are you…”

My words of about a week ago snapped back to me, and I felt the sting of regret in my chest. I sighed.

“…Max, you know I didn’t really mean it about not wanting you to  _ talk,  _ right?”

He seemed to think about it.

“Yeah. I know.”

“So why don’t you—”

“But even if you were just angry at the time, I’m starting to think…maybe you’re right. Sometimes I just say things without considering what they might do. I should’ve cut down on that a long time ago.”

My eyebrows knit. “Well, no,” I said simply. He looked to me with the kind of confusion I should have expected, and I twiddled my thumbs.

“Ugh. This is what I get for making you my  _ assistant. _ I…I like talking to you, okay? You’re the only person who’s treated me like an actual human being in god knows how long.” I sighed. “So don’t listen to me too much when I get…you know. Like _ that. _ ”

Max paused and then scoffed. “That’s what you’ve wanted this entire time? To be seen as human? Because given the kind of spot we’re in, I’d say that’s a lost cause.”

“I thought you’d gotten it by now! My whole thing with killing, that’s just for survival at this point. I can never be too sure of what’s going to happen if I let someone go. Hell, you’re the one who—”

“I never said you didn’t have a reason. Unless you’ve got somebody on the other side of the country waiting to take you in, I’m kind of all you have right now. You can’t afford to be  _ seen _ at all, let alone as something else.”

_ Something else? _ My ego had definitely been knocked down a few notches ever since Liu kicked me out, but that was a little uncalled for. I couldn’t exactly turn on everything I’d just said for something petty like that, though, so I took it with an uncomfortable sense of grace.

“…so you’re still looking for them, aren’t you,” I muttered, desperate for a change in subject. Max’s hands twitched.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Yeah, you do. Don’t lie to me. Your ‘family,’ or whatever you call them—they’re probably still out there. Is that who you’re trying to find in all this?”

His mouth formed a thin line on his face, and I could almost feel the worry coming off him. He rubbed one of his eyes underneath the mask. “I…yeah. I  _ am _ trying to find them. It’s what I’ve been doing for the past five years, I can’t just stop now. Why’d you ask?”

I let out a huge breath. “Well, it’s not like I have anything else to do right now. Besides, maybe they’re far enough from here that we won’t be spotted as easily.”

He turned to me, like he couldn’t decide whether to be skeptical or relieved or something entirely different.

“You’re going to help me…?”

I would have blinked if I could. “Uh. Sure. Not because I actually  _ want  _ to, but yeah,” I added hastily, folding my arms and looking elsewhere. “It’s the least I could do, you know?”

It seemed he was still torn on how to react, because he leaned forward to hug me multiple times but then pulled himself back, unsure. I pinched the bridge of my nose and berated myself in my head.

_ Idiot. This is going to go nowhere. _

When nothing happened for the next five minutes except us sitting next to each other in waiting for tomorrow, I figured that maybe I was okay with going nowhere for now.

[MASQ]

I found myself unable to breathe properly for the rest of the night. I was overcome with every single emotion I could possibly have named, spiraling in some sort of amalgam nightmare while on the outside nothing was moving. It felt surreal to finally be offered help, and for real this time. I pushed the few locks of hair in my eyes back, too scared to blink. My gaze kept flickering to the side, hoping for some kind of sign that he wasn’t making any of this up. Occasionally, he’d be looking back at me. Full hours consisted of that, which got old very quickly. When morning finally came, I stood up and waited for Hodek to follow with our makeshift tool bag. He was still sitting up, eyes still open, his head resting in a hand and facing eastward. It took me a good second to realize they were glazed over, meaning he was actually asleep. As daylight crept down his face, he woke up with a jolt and noticed me crouching right by him with a concerned expression. He took a couple of breaths while looking straight at me, and part of me felt just a little unnerved that he slept with his eyes open.

_ Well, what else do you expect him to do? _

I shook myself of the idea and grabbed Jeff’s hand, helping him to his feet. I offered to carry our things this time around, but he weakly assured me that he was fine with the job. “I just get a little dizzy in the morning is all. I-I’m okay,” he said, furrowing his eyebrows and scratching at a scar-free patch at the base of his neck. After a few awkward seconds, I tugged gently at one of his sleeves.

“Thanks.”

“Don’t mention it.”

“No, I mean…thanks for helping me. I didn’t really say anything about it last night, but I’m really glad I managed to run into you at one point or another.”

Something about that seemed to get under his skin. His face grew pink, and he clenched the fist that held our bag.

“Yeah, sure,” he said, more rushed than sarcastic. “Just don’t thank me until we actually get there. And I have a feeling that’s going to take a while, so…maybe don’t do it, period.”

“Got it,” I muttered, not sure what else could be added that didn’t make this whole thing weirder. We sort of wandered off in one direction, following my instincts paired with his quick thinking and eye for danger. Having somebody to sleep next to every other night didn’t stop the visions, though.


	25. Chapter 25

“Again! Again!”

I threw my arms into the air with joy, and Birthday laughed as he plucked random strings on his old guitar.

“Man, you act just like a little kid sometimes, you know? You’re almost 13 now, and look at you!”

“I don’t care, B-Day, you _have_ to play our song again! Please?”

He sighed and shifted on the floor to make himself comfortable. “Alright. It _is_ pretty good, right?”

“Well, you’re not allowed to say that. You’re the one who wrote it.”

“Shh,” Birthday shushed me and held a finger to his lips. He slowly began to strum, with his capo on the sixth fret. I sat and listened to him sing even softer than before,

_“Don’t struggle, pinky kid, I’ll be right there for you._

_“Don’t smile if it hurts, you need some resting too._

_“Be braver than those guys who need their blue to stand._

_“You’re so remarkable, and—_ ”

“Is that Birthday’s guitar I hear?”

He stopped playing immediately, and I saw a trace of panic in his features before he realized Anniversary was just visiting our room.

“Hey, Anni,” I said, grinning and pushing Birthday’s shoulder to signal him to keep playing. He didn’t just yet, though.

“What brings you here to the cavern of awesomeness?” He asked, gesturing around himself like a king. I giggled, while Anni just scoffed and shook her head.

“You better not be playing that stupid song without _me_ again.”

“Masquie likes it, you know that.”

“Still! Wait for me to get off patrol before you start fooling around, huh? Now.” She sat down on the ground in front of us, completing the circle. “How about that _clever girl_ bit that you said was just for me.” She flashed a smug grin and rested her head in her hand. Birthday clicked his tongue and rearranged his fingers to play the second verse.

_“Don’t stifle, clever girl, your words can make you strong._

_“Don’t step back from success, those adults are a’thinking wrong.”_

I shifted closer to both of them and joined in.

_“Be angry so they know, they’re picking stupid fights!_

_“You’re so unstoppable, and you can reach those unknown…”_

“Heiiiiights!” We all finished, holding out the note for as long as we could. Anni and I laughed, and Birthday leaned back and placed his guitar on the ground beside him. Anni picked it up.

“Where’d you learn to play this thing, anyway? It’s so _weird._ ”

“Yeah, my imposters were crazy rich. I was just delivering this back to some dude for them when the Elder found me, and it turned out one of the guards knew how to play. Taught me everything I know. I can never find him now.” He sat up again, fiddling with the little tuning knobs at the end. “It’s pretty cool, though, right?”

“I guess.”

“Yeah!” I agreed, flopping back onto the floor and stretching. “Hey, do either of you think I’ll get assigned something anytime soon? Like guard, or scouting, or naming?”

“Uh, Masquie, I think only the Elder gets to name people.”

“That’s not true. I saw someone tell the new kid that her name was Xylophone.”

Anni flicked my nose. “That’s not a _real_ naming, dummy. Was it Event?”

“…maybe.”

She sighed and chuckled. “He’s always doing stuff like that. It’s an inside joke. Remember when Birthday tricked you into thinking _he_ was named Xylophone when you first came here?”

“Oh, yeah. I guess you’re right.”

The two of them laughed, and eventually, I did too.

* * *

 I woke up with a heavy head and one numb wrist. Trying to ground myself, I took a quick glance around and realized Hodek had been resting an arm on me in waiting. When I reached up to rub my eyes, he started and got up immediately.

“Oh. You’re up.”

“I think we’re getting closer,” I said, mostly to myself. That didn’t stop him from catching it. He raised an eyebrow, and just from looking I could tell he’d been up way earlier than he intended to let on. “Why would you think that? Do you recognize anything about this place?”

It struck me suddenly that I’d forgotten where we even were right now. We had just picked a random secluded area and settled there for a night. I tried to make out what I’d been sleeping on this entire time, which is difficult when only one of your arms is strong enough to lift you off the ground. _Must’ve slept on the other funny._

“…no,” I admitted. “I just have a feeling.”

“Was it one of those dreams?”

My head snapped up. Hodek didn’t look annoyed, or even like he was making fun of me. His face was a blank slate, waiting until my answer to show any real emotion. I narrowed my eyes. “How did you know…?”

“Because I’m not stupid. Also, you talk in your sleep. Kind of a lot. I-It’s fine.” He stuffed his hands in his pockets and looked away like it pained him to ask this. “So what happened in there that gives you that ‘feeling’?”

I hesitated. Usually, given the choice I would have kept my dreams to myself. Who could understand, anyways? But this time it was different. This was a matter of helping myself. If it meant telling him more about my family…

_Alright. So be it._

“I don’t really know how close we are, to tell you the truth. But I was in my room with my brother and sister…it was all some old memory, I know it was. We were just laughing and having a good time. It was so much more vivid than everything else I’ve seen in my sleep, I really thought I was back there with them again.” I blinked and looked down once more, recognizing asphalt below me. It seemed we were in some sort of empty lot; a new low for us. I took a shaky breath.

“It’s a sign, I know it is. These visions, dreams, whatever you want to call them…they’ve just been getting clearer and clearer. We’re heading in the right direction.”

He didn’t seem to know what to say other than “okay.” After a short silence, he sighed, crouched down and pat me on the shoulder. “We’d better get going, then. I’ll let you carry the books, if you want.” He gave a half-assed attempt at an encouraging smile. It didn’t make me feel a whole lot better, but I appreciated that he was at least trying. I nodded and stood up, gathering our resources and tying the cloth in a kind of sling on my shoulder. Put together, they were a lot lighter than I remembered. I looked to Hodek with an eyebrow raised, and he reluctantly took _When All Hell Breaks Loose_ out of his front sweater pocket.

“Yeah, I’m keeping this. Besides, even if we lose it, we still have most of the important stuff down on the map. So no worries.” The way his voice wavered on that last sentence successfully assured me that there were, indeed, _worries._ But I tried my best to dismiss it. “Sure.” I noticed now that I was upright, I felt much colder than when I’d been curled up on the ground. I cursed in my head. Throughout all these years, I’d never even thought to steal a jacket or anything. Now I just had to stand the chilliness until we found some other refuge. I tried not to let it show how uncomfortable I really was and pushed on. I started shivering after a short while on the move, though, and eventually Hodek muttered something about biting off more than I could chew and took the bag off my hands. I would have justified it with the fact that he probably—no, _definitely_ had more physical stamina than me. But he didn’t seem to be having a very good time walking this much with a load, either. We came to a stop at a large fork in the road. Hodek’s face fell, and he looked nervously back and forth between me and the two paths.

“Now would be a _real_ good time to fall asleep and get some more directions.”

“I don’t think you know exactly how this works.”

“Well, at least guess. Go with your gut, I don’t know.” He crossed his arms and let out a shudder disguised as a cough. I noticed after a few seconds that he was almost clutching to himself, like at any moment something would go horribly wrong.

“Hodek.”

He attempted to narrow his eyes. “What.”

“Are you okay?”

A good two minutes passed before he could put his thoughts into words.

“…it’s been a long time since Angus tried to ruin things for us, hasn’t it.”

My blood ran cold at that name. I wasn’t sure why now; we’d run into him more than once. Right this moment was arguably the worst time to be thinking about these things. I shook my head and began walking down the left path, but Hodek grabbed my arm.

“Max, what if this is exactly where he wants us to go?”

“What, to the left?”

“No. To your…you know.”

His eyes were filled with immeasurable fear, something I never thought I’d see in _him_ of all people. I considered shaking off his grip, but instead just covered his hand with my own.

“If we keep worrying about what that _thing_ wants of us, then we’ll be standing here forever. Let’s go this way. We’re going to be fine.”


	26. Chapter 26

After all our days running from god-knows-what, we realized that neither I nor Hodek had killed in a while. It was a bit relieving for me, but he didn’t seem so pleased with himself. It was as if his self-worth was tied into murder, or the other way around. Either way, I knew he was growing antsy. _Only a matter of time before he starts again. Or just completely loses it._

We came across another staple American suburbia before long, not that we were too far away from that part of the state in general. There’d be plenty of supplies here that would be easy to get and could do us well. The problem—at least for me—was that a couple people may have had to die in exchange for them. It definitely didn’t bother Hodek. In fact, the moment we laid our eyes on the first couple of houses in our path, his face almost seemed to light up. It might have been cute or heartwarming if not for what he was actually looking forward to do.

So it was back to our old business for now.

As we came around the back of a particularly big home, his hands twitched in anticipation and I could feel him just struggling to hold himself back.

“Wait.”

His eyes darted around from the roof, to the upstairs window, to the gutters and then his knife. Finally, he let out a disappointed sigh.

“No. We can’t do this one. If these people have any sense they’d use the money they _clearly_ have,” he said, gesturing to the wall we were staring at (though I couldn’t begin to imagine how he was able to tell they were rich), “to upgrade their security. People in this town could have heard about us, or at least about the murders. This one’s a no-go.”

I blinked. “Well, I’ll never know how you managed to gather all that from a _wall,_ but if there’s one thing I’ve learned from the wealthy after all these years, it’s that they can be kind of stupid sometimes. And this was when I didn’t even bother breaking my path up to avoid being spotted; it was just one house after another in a straight line.”

“So you’re saying we have a chance here.”

“Maybe. Besides…” I walked over to a windowsill, cut up the screen to reach through, and harshly pulled up on the inside frame. Nothing.

“…the windows are shut and locked. Now, these people could just be _really_ paranoid and are trying to be as safe as possible. But it looks to me that they don’t have much of a death trap guarding them either way. Take your pick.”

Hodek raised an eyebrow. “Weirdly phrased, but you’ve made your point. Let’s see what we can find in there. Can you climb right now?”

“Probably not any better than you. Are we doing the knives thing again?”

He shrugged and produced two more sharpened blades from another pocket somewhere on him. “What does it look like.”

“Fair. Maybe I’ve improved.”

“That’s the spirit.” He grinned and tossed me one knife while he stuck the other two into the wall and rubbed his hands together in preparation. Once he’d reached a high-up window, I took one last gulp of the cold night air and followed.

The inside of this house felt like the physical manifestation of “don’t judge a book by its cover,” by which I mean it was old beyond belief whereas the outside was polished and modern. Five seconds couldn’t pass without floorboards creaking, dust getting caught in my eye or a cobweb clinging to either one of us. Hodek seemed particularly agitated by this, which was a little unusual for him. Maybe he’d had his fill of old, seemingly abandoned houses in the past, what with all the moving. I kept having to blink little particles of dirt away, and shift my weight to the right—“no, the _other_ right”—as we tried to navigate this place.

For a good while, there seemed to be nobody living here. It might have been vacated a long time ago; that’d explain the locked windows and barren, almost ancient interior. But soon enough we heard scuffling downstairs, looked at each other, and nodded. It didn’t really matter if somebody was just visiting; in fact, that almost made it better for us.

Halfway across the first floor of the house, Hodek tapped my shoulder and whispered, “Get your twine ready.” I searched my belt, feeling a split second’s panic before realizing it was already wrapped around my hand. I nodded and held the twine in a tight fist before continuing forward. I heard a soft _clunk_ behind me and whirled around to see that Hodek had set our books down, picking up _Runaway_ and drumming his fingers lightly across the cover.

“You know, we haven’t really used this one yet.”

“I really don’t think this is a time to be planning where—”

“Not for information, dumbass,” he chuckled, the name seeming to be more affectionate than insulting. “I’m gonna…you know.” He mimed swinging the book flat against something, as if hitting a homerun. I raised an eyebrow.

“And that’s going to work? The cover really isn’t that hard, I’d be surprised if—”

“Eh, it might. When push comes to shove, I’ll just use one of these,” he said, raising his other hand and wiggling his fingers back and forth. I sighed.

“Well, then what am I going to need the twine for if they’ll just be knocked out?”

“For when they wake up.”

* * *

 It was disquieting, how much more time and thought he was putting into this kill than usual. I’d thought that in this deprived state, he would want to get it done as soon as possible. But it seemed just the opposite of that right now. He wasn’t looking for information. He wasn’t waiting for me to interrogate some stranger about the whereabouts of my family, and he definitely wasn’t looking to pick a fight with someone genuinely horrible. This was something different; this was pure bloodlust.

As another person came into sight around the corner, I noticed Hodek wasted no time in charging at them, book in hand. Fortunately for them, they managed to turn around in time. Unfortunately, that meant they got hit right between the eyes with the spine of a Wendelin Van Draanen novel. They fell immediately, a red stripe marking the center of their face and their body hitting the floor with a less-than-grand _thud._

Hodek caught his breath and sank to his knees, checking this person’s pockets and the inside of their shoes for any weapons. He found a Swiss Army knife and began to tuck it away for safekeeping, before realizing he could simply use it on them when the time came. For a good couple of minutes, he kept flicking it open and closing it slowly, like he was trying to sharpen it with its own friction. I was left to propping the body up against a wall, while Hodek sat in front of it in waiting. After what felt like ages, they finally came to.

“…I…huh…?” At the sight of me attempting to remember how to play Cat’s Cradle with my twine and Hodek toying with _their knife_ , the person’s eyes snapped open and they threw a weak punch by instinct. Hodek was just barely able to dodge.

“So that’s what we’re doing, is it?” He said under his breath as his victim struggle to get to their feet. Jeff scoffed grabbed both of their wrists, trying to keep them on the ground. They pushed and kicked and yelled like nothing I’d seen over the last couple of years, and it took Hodek nearly clamping their jaw shut to get them quiet.

“Will…you…stop _moving?”_ he growled, pausing to yank my arm forward and point at the victim’s feet without even looking my way. I immediately crouched down and started binding their ankles, trying not to let the persistent kicks and struggling bother me. Hodek let out a small hum of approval once I had done the job decently.

“Thank you, partner.”

For some reason, hearing that now sent a wave of shivers down my spine for all kinds of reasons. I shook myself and focused again at the task at hand, which now was to just watch.

“Now…what’s your name?”

At this point, they had settled down but didn’t break eye contact for one second. They managed to say through their fear, “Kyle.” They were shaking almost violently as Hodek drew the knife across their cheek, as if planning where to make the first cuts.

“Kyle,” he echoed. “That’s a nice name. I’m sure you could’ve come up with something better to tell me, though.”

I frowned, tilting my head to get a good look at this other guy’s face. “You never said _my_ name was nice when we first met,” I said without a second thought. I was met with a chuckle.

“Please. That was very, very, _very_ different. Besides, might as well make ‘Kyle’ feel good for something. Because pretty soon, he’s going to be nothing.” He paused in contemplation. “Unless…he’s willing to give my way a try.”

_‘My way?’ What could that…_

My eyes widened when I realized exactly what he was referring to.

_Well. Whatever makes him happier._

The person, who probably wasn’t named Kyle, tried to shift backwards but was caught between a murderer and the wall. “Y-your way? What do you mean? A-are you just going to torture me?”

“Oh, no,” Hodek muttered, twirling the blade around lazily before his grin widened even further. “In fact, I’m sure it’ll even put a smile on your face. Won’t it, Max?”

“I don’t think I should say, if I’m being honest.”

“Fair enough.”

He grabbed Kyle’s face—well, mainly their jaw—and held it still while the other apparently decided that struggling wasn’t going to work for them any longer. They actually seemed a bit curious about what Hodek was going to do. That is, until the knife approached their left cheek.

Jeff the Killer went to work, making the process as slow as humanly possible. He sliced and carved, blood pooling in the victim’s mouth and dripping out onto the floor. Kyle squeezed their eyes shut and clenched their teeth so as not to make any noise, and their effort was commendable. But it was obvious they weren’t far from screaming their lungs out. Jeff didn’t bother hiding the fact that he was savoring every bit of this; I could see the glee in his eyes even from where I was crouching.

When he was finished with his masterpiece, Kyle glared and grabbed his hand, positioning the knife over their own heart with tears running down their face.

“Please,” they whispered. “Just do it. I can’t…I _won’t_ live like this.” Whatever stutter they’d developed before was now gone, and to my surprise, Hodek didn’t move.

“No. You won’t.” He sighed. “Max…you know why I only settled on killing bigots and assholes for a while?”

That got my attention. Well, anymore than it could have over the gore. “I’m guessing it doesn’t have much to do with justice?”

“Oh, that’s probably some part of it. But usually, I only got a couple of kills per town. One or two, maybe even three. So I had to make them count. Right now, though?” He cocked his head and looked back to the shaking figure before him.

“I’m just trying to get my fix.”

And he drove the knife into Kyle’s heart, no doubt breaking a couple of ribs in the process. The life in their eyes slowly petered out, like dripping water onto a flame.

“I hope it doesn’t hurt your feelings. Truly.”

There wasn’t an ounce of sarcasm in his voice, but it didn’t seem like he cared all that much, either. The chokes and gasped that had filled the room died out after about a minute, and for the millionth time we were left alone.

He slowly drew his knife out of the smiling person’s body, as if expecting a high from it. That seemed to be what he got; his breath shallowed and the corners of his mouth began to turn up in a psychotic grin that matched his carved one. Even though this was far more controlled and quiet than his usual style, I couldn’t help but feel disconcerted. Regardless of _why_ he’d gotten into murder in the first place, he seemed to relish it now. I weaved my fingers together and averted my eyes from the scene before me.

“So…did that help?”

He turned his head just slightly to indicate he’d heard me. He didn’t bother to ask what I was talking about. “Maybe. I think I’m starting to feel something,” he muttered, his voice even more gravelly than normal. I narrowed my eyes.

“And what would that be?”

He chuckled once—never a good sound to hear from a knife-wielding burnout.

“It’s joy.”


	27. Chapter 27

[JEFF]

“Gather the rest of the books and let’s get going.”

I looked down at my sweater. Drops of blood lined each sleeve, and on top of that my right shin was soaked from kneeling on the stained floor. I cursed in my head, though ordinarily this kind of sight would have given me even more of a rush. But now it was just messy to me.

_Seeing more clearly, now, are you?_

I had no way of telling whether that was Angus or not, and at that point I didn’t want to know. I sighed and stood up straight, examining this (now dead) guy’s Swiss Army knife. Most of the little tools had been long coated in rust. I wondered if he ever thought to _really_ use it, or if he just thought it a handy thing to have around. Maybe he just never cleaned it properly. I shifted my gaze to where Max was standing, holding our books in the sling but looking a bit troubled. I found it in myself to chuckle.

“Still not _completely_ on board with the whole cold-blooded killing thing?”

“Not completely, no.”

“Hm. Well, I can work with that. I’m just glad it’s not…” I trailed off. I wasn’t exactly sure of what I was even going to say. I flicked the blade closed and stuffed it in a pocket again.

“…something else,” I decided on. He seemed to catch my drift.

“So are we going to leave?”

“Yeah, yeah, I just got a little distracted.” I picked at one of the many scars peppered on my hands and tried my best to narrow my eyes. It hadn’t been as cathartic as I expected to be “myself” again. A weak sense of disappointment started to rise and fall with my chest. I shook my head, almost by habit, and started walking without another word.

* * *

 Somehow, through pure luck and a fucked-up sleeping routine, we were able to make it through the night without getting drowsy at all. Normally, after a kill like that we’d head back to the trapdoor and get some rest. But we didn’t really have anywhere to go back to right now. So we kept on in the direction Max’s intuition, or whatever, was leading us. I noticed he was almost bowing his head, trying not to take his eyes off the street ahead. Maybe it was to honor that innocent person I’d killed? Either way, I hated looking at him, all mopey like that.

_Eh. It’s worth a shot._

“You wanna hear a joke?”

He gave me only a quick glance, then shrugged and continued walking. “That depends. What kind of joke?”

“Doesn’t matter. You’ll like it, I promise.”

“…alright, then.”

“Okay.” I cleared my throat, not that it would do much. “So, a rabbit walks into a butcher shop, and asks the butcher if he has any carrots. Butcher says, ‘No, sorry, this is a butcher shop. We only sell meat.’ Rabbit says, ‘Oh, okay,’ then leaves. The next day he comes back again, asks the butcher if he has any carrots. The butcher says, again, ‘No, we don’t have any. We only sell meat.’ At this point, he’s getting a little pissed off.

“So the next day, _again,_ the rabbit walks in. Asks for some carrots. The butcher says, ‘I swear to God, if you walk in here asking for carrots one more time I’m going to nail your body to the fucking wall!’ And wouldn’t you believe it, the next day the rabbit doesn’t show up. And the next, and maybe even a couple more days after that.

“Finally, he comes back around. Walks into the shop again. Asks the butcher, ‘Excuse me, do you have any _nails?’_ That kinda catches the guy by surprise, he answers honestly. ‘No.’ And then that little shit of a rabbit, you know what he does? He smiles, folds his hands behind his back and says, ‘Okay, then. Do you have any carrots?’”

A couple moments passed between that and the first laugh. And it wasn’t a loud one, either. Max just snickered a little, blinking once and continuing to look off into the distance. I sighed and flicked him on the shoulder.

“You know, with your sense of humor I figured you’d be rolling on the floor by now.”

“No, that was funny. I’ve just learned to calm down with these kinds of things.” He turned to me with genuine intrigue. “Did you make that up yourself?”

“Of course not. I’m pretty sure it’s a classic, I just knew you probably never heard it before. So, you’re welcome.”

“Oh, I’m not sure how I could have even _lived_ without hearing it,” he fired back, his tone dry but his gaze amused and warm. He pinched a small patch of my sleeve between his thumb and forefinger, as if about to tug me along in some new direction. But he didn’t change his pace; he was just feeling the cloth, making sure I was still there. _Abandonment issues,_ I found myself guessing. _Whether he realizes it or not, it’s probably something like that._

After about a mile, we stopped dead at a street corner and I knew exactly why. With dawn about to arrive, and just enough light provided to see the white lines on the road clearly, Max had spotted a conspicuous trail of footprints leading off to the grassy hillside before us. There was no way of telling who they belonged to, or even what kind of a person unless you’re _really_ acquainted with shoes. This was the case for neither of us. I looked up at the sky for a brief moment, praying to whoever was up there that this decision wouldn’t be any worse than the ones I’d made so far, and grabbed Max’s hand.

“So…we’re following these, right?”

“Oh, yeah. I was just about to say—”

“Even if it doesn’t lead to your family?”

He paused. I could hear something start to click in his brain. Or maybe it was more of a soft beeping noise. Either way, he gave a feeble attempt at brushing it off before moving forward again.

“If it’s not the right way, I’ll know by tomorrow. Let’s go.”

[MASQ]

The trail would fade away into the dirt and then spring back every now and then, so much so that it made me wonder if we were even following the same person at this point. Hodek, strangely, wasn’t deterred. It all only made him more curious, which was something you didn’t see every day from a person like him. I was beginning to grow tired by the time we reached a wide, ring-like clearing surrounded by trees with only one noticeable path out. The footprints took a sharp left turn from there, but we stopped once more. This time, I couldn’t tell why until I spotted a figure completely shrouded in shadow on the other side of the clearing. And it looked like they spotted us, too.

Immediately, I dropped our sling of books on the ground and kicked them to the side. Things might have been about to get messy. My eyes had adjusted to the dark hours ago, but I still couldn’t make out anything except this person’s silhouette. They were brandishing only a small pocket knife, their armed hand almost shaking. It didn’t seem to me like they were wounded, and they didn’t even look afraid of us. If anything, they were confused. Maybe even angry.

I looked to Hodek for some sort of explanation, but he stared blankly ahead as if he were just as in the dark. He started reaching into his pocket, but before he could draw anything the person spoke in low tones.

“You again.”

Whatever wind was making the trees shiver in the night came to an abrupt stop. I got the feeling something horrible was about to happen, though at this point I wasn’t sure whether I could even trust my intuition anymore.

“How many times…do I have to _kill_ you?”


	28. Chapter 28

They stepped out into sight, and we were met with a face too pale to be real and a tattered gray dress stained with what must have been blood. It hit me after a moment that this person—a girl, if I wasn’t mistaken—was probably just wearing a mask, like me. I went against every logical thought I’d produced in the last minute and took one step towards her respectively.

“No,” Hodek whispered. I turned to see that he hadn’t moved from his spot, and he was looking at the girl with exasperation. “She’s talking to me. Stand down, would you—?”

I blinked, and all of a sudden he was on the ground, tackled by the girl in gray. She tried multiple times to stab him in the gut, missing all but one time. Jeff let out a pained grunt and managed to throw her off, taking out his own knife and standing up before she could try at it again.

“For Christ’s sake, lay  _ off,  _ Jane!”

“No. Not until I know you’re dead. Not until—”

“Are you deaf, or just shit at remembering?!  _ I’m not who you think I am!” _

“Don’t lie to me again, Woods!”

And she charged with even more fury than before, if that’s possible, but instead of fighting back, Hodek just kept dodging her. Like he knew that if he hurt her somehow, nothing good would come of it. He ducked, ran, hid behind trees, and it was all too fast for me to even process correctly. As she was about to try taking out his eyes, I finally had the nerve to run up and pull her off him by the arms.

“Jane, was it? Listen to me. He’s telling the truth, this isn’t Jeff Woods you’re dealing wi—”

“Don’t touch me!”

She broke free from my grip, whirled around and sliced at my face, almost chipping one of my teeth but missing by an inch. I fell back and hit my head on a tree root, hearing a soft  _ crack _ . When I tried standing up, it ached like nothing else and a switch seemed to flip in my brain. The good news was, she’d stopped attacking Hodek. He righted himself and slowly backed away, holding his knife defensively. I pressed a hand to my cheek, feeling blood trickle down my palm. I clenched my teeth, partly in pain and partly in anger.

“What is the matter with you?! I tried to help, and you cut my face! He didn’t do anything to—”

“Max, shut your mouth and  _ stay back _ . This doesn’t involve you.” Hodek interrupted, just as angrily. He turned back to Jane, something in his gaze shifting from annoyed to pleading.

“And Jane…don’t hurt him. It’s me you’re after. Please, just leave him alone.”

I propped myself up on my arms, reaching for my pliers and feeling something even more building up inside me. “Why aren’t you fighting back, Hodek? This isn’t like you. If it were any other girl, she’d be dead by now.”

“‘Hodek,’ huh?” Jane scoffed, chest still heaving from that one-sided battle. I noticed in the moonlight that her hair shone almost unnaturally, as if that was fake, too. I narrowed my eyes.

“And what happened to  _ you?” _

“Max!” Hodek said with the air of someone trying to control a misbehaving child. I didn’t dare move past that. He seemed to calm down, if only by a little, and gestured to Jane with a defeated sigh.

“This is the Jane I met, years ago. The one I told you about? Kept mistaking me for the guy who killed her family, and, uh…” he bit the inside of his cheek before continuing. “…did worse to her.”

“I killed him, you know,” Jane piped up, her arms now resting at her sides. It looked as if she really did believe us now. “Jeff Woods, that is. Gouged his eyes out. Almost chopped off his head. But knowing him, even from that he’d probably find a way to get back up. I couldn’t take any chances.” She turned to Hodek, still a little wary.

“I don’t get it. You…you’re just like him, except—”

“Except I’m not?” He nearly laughed, though I had the feeling he didn’t find it funny at all. “Why does this keep happening? I don’t look like him, I’m not even the right age! I’ve been training myself, working to the point of insanity just to stay alive, and that little fucker is a  _ twig. _ If one more person—”

“Hodek, calm down,” I said against my better judgement. Another attempt to stand up on my own failed, and Jeff grumbled something to himself as he walked over to help me up.

“You don’t understand,” he whispered, holding me by the shoulders.  _ “This _ is the disaster that’s been waiting to happen. I’ve had a couple scrapes with death, but more than once was because people can’t get the difference between me and Woods through their thick skulls. I know it sounds stupid—”

“It doesn’t.”

Hodek turned around, a sense of panic seeming to fill him within the second. I grabbed one of his hands and gently moved it off my shoulder. He didn’t say anything, but I could tell exactly what he was thinking:  _ She thinks I just called her an idiot, doesn’t she. _

Jane continued. “I know you from somewhere, Jeff…Hodek?”

“Yeah, we’ve met before—”

“No, not that, dumbass. I’ve heard your story. Something about a tub, and some acid, I think. Nasty way to go, if you ask me.”

Hodek raised an eyebrow. “You say that like I died.”

“And part of you didn’t?”

_ Shit. This girl is smart. _

Hodek looked just as taken aback as I was. I took the opportunity to try making out all I could of her face, but it was impossible. Her mask was completely expressionless, almost a blank slate of sorts. Even with the light available her eyes remained completely shrouded in shadow underneath the plastic, and it bothered me for reasons I couldn’t place.

“…your mask. It’s a little over the top, don’t you think?”

“Well, look who I’m talking to,” Jane said, clearly not offended but a little surprised I would even think about commenting that.

“But it covers your whole face,” I protested. “You really don’t need that.”

“Yours has  _ rhinestones _ .”

“Oh, like I made that choice. Why do you even wear that thing?”

She paused like I’d just struck a nerve. I was about to take back my question when she tapped the mask as if to make a point.

“I don’t think you want to see what’s underneath.”

“Can’t be any worse than me.” Hodek interjected himself into the conversation, looking a little bit afraid as to where it might have led. Jane fixed him with a blank look—well, as blank as you can get without an actual face—and crossed her arms.

“Sorry. What I  _ meant  _ was that I’m not going to show a couple of relative strangers the scars that ruined my life.”

“Fair enough.”

After a long, awkward silence, she took another step towards Hodek, to which he moved away again. She cocked her head.

“You’re a funny one. He’s right, your little partner; you could’ve easily killed me. But you didn’t. Why?”

Hodek furrowed his eyebrows, fiddling with the edge of his knife. “Probably wouldn’t have been able to live with it, to be honest. I know my limits.”

She thought about that. “I guess that makes you one of the few who really do.” With a quick glance up at the breaking daylight, she took a couple steps backward, almost reluctantly.

“Well, gentlemen, I should get going. You probably should, too, if you want to keep out of prison.”

I nodded wordlessly, not that there was much more to say. Jane turned her attention to Hodek again, and though I couldn’t see her face, I felt an odd sense of sorrow coming from her.

“I never want to see you again.”

Hodek fiddled with the ends of his sleeves. “Likewise. You killed the one guy who was able to distract the police from me.”

“I don’t regret it.”

“I know.”

She wasted no time in fleeing after that.


	29. Chapter 29

We both stood, at a loss for action, listening to leaves crunch as she disappeared into the forest. That had been one of the strangest interactions of my life and Hodek almost seemed bored. I sighed, picking at the edge of my sleeve and shifting my gaze back and forth between him and the narrow space in between trees that Jane had left through.

“So. That was her.”

“It sure was.”

When I didn’t say anything else, he looked a little surprised.

“…did you have a point?”

“I’m not sure. I guess it’s just not how I imagined her.” I looked up at the sky a second time; daytime really was setting in. Everything was an orange-pink blur and there wasn’t a cloud in sight. The last five years of my life had trained me almost to fear the day. I had to ignore the alarms being set off in my brain, telling me to dig a hole or go further into the woods for any hope of survival.  _ No. I’m not alone anymore. _

“Nevermind. That was just an interesting little detour, let’s go on.”

“Yeah. We still need to find out who made those tracks we were following.”

I paused. “Wait, so you  _ don’t  _ think those were Jane? I thought we just—”

“No, no, of course it wasn’t Jane. Did you see her shoes? Some kind of high-heeled atrocity. Those were normal footprints, probably sneakers. The search isn’t over yet.”

After a moment, I sighed. I hadn’t even thought to look at her shoes, and I was supposed to be the tactical one. At least, as much as him. Hodek seemed to notice my disappointment, and out of all the things he could have done, he just pat me on the back.

“Yeah, it’s fine. You’ll get it eventually. Hey—I think I see the end of the prints, right over there.”

He pointed at a patch of grass currently being illuminated by morning’s light. We both knew better than to actually go over and see it for ourselves; I furrowed my eyebrows, glanced back at our things in a heap on the ground, and picked up the map to scan.

“It looks like we’re in Brookebury Park. It’s right next to a high school and…” I squinted at a large but unfamiliar shape that was apparently less than 100 feet from us.

“…some kind of abandoned, underground parking lot?”

“What? Gimme that.” Hodek scoffed and tore the map from my hands, shifting gears into full-on detective mode.

“Huh. I guess that’s the only thing it  _ could  _ be. We’ll find out tomorrow.”

“What can we do until then?”

He looked at me for a split second, and then back to the map, a bit stumped. “…well, we could always just go deeper into these woods. Maybe set up  _ temporary  _ camp. Make sure nothings’s followed us here.”

I nodded and pulled  _ The Wide Window  _ out from the cloth. “Read,” I said without any further elaboration. Hodek looked uncertain, but didn’t seem to have an argument.

“Sure. We’ll read, too.”

“I wasn’t really asking for your approval, but thank you anyway.” I started walking past the circle of trees with the sling on my shoulder and book in hand. If Hodek thought I was being smart with him, he didn’t show it. He followed, looking just a little less regretful than usual.

* * *

We found a nice spot near one of the larger trees, the overlapping branches above forming a sort of canopy. If I held my legs close and ducked my head while sitting in between two of the tree’s roots, I became practically invisible. As I buried my nose in the book trying to make out its words, Hodek ruffled my hair and made some offhand comment about how skinny I was under his breath. I ignored him for my own sanity, settling further into the darkness that now surrounded me. He walked off to see if he could find anything substantial for the both of us to eat; it’d been days since we had a decent meal, and something told me it would be a little bit longer until we got one.

After almost half an hour, when I had just reached the most dramatic part of the book where everything was starting to come together— _ Aunt Josephine didn’t  _ really  _ die, did she? _ —Hodek returned with some poor dead thing skewered on his knife and started assembling any stones he could carry into a tiny circle. I lifted my head, half-annoyed and half-intrigued.

“What've you got there?”

“Squirrel.”

I chuckled. “Fine. Keep it a secret.”

Hodek raised an eyebrow and then a bloodied hand as if to prove something. “No, I’m serious. You really think I was going to tackle a deer just to tide us over until nighttime? Now put your book down and gather some leaves, we’re making a fire.”

My stomach churned, though I couldn’t tell if it was from hunger or mild disgust. “So you got us a  _ squirrel  _ for breakfast? I’m not sure if I could eat that, morally speaking.”

He scoffed and grabbed a large stick off the ground, nodding towards another one near me. I reluctantly handed it to him and he got to work. Through several huffs and grunts, he managed to say, “You can eat cows, chickens, and pigs, but this is where you’d draw the line? Do you wanna eat or not?” He stopped to wipe some sweat off his forehead, wincing as he realized he’d just smeared dirt and blood across the scars. I sighed and stepped forward to help him with the fire.  _ They make it seem so much easier in books and movies. This is some cut-the-shit thankless work. _

When we finally got something going, our worries went through a sudden shift from “how do we start a fire without killing ourselves” to “how do we keep said fire from spreading to the entire forest.” We decided that at least one pair of eyes must be kept on the stones at all times, and the second the meat had been cooked enough the flames had to be put out. Luckily, we didn’t have any significant problems with either of those. The forest floor was already pretty damp, so putting it out was no big deal. The worst part, or really the only bad part in general, was that Jeff had been right; squirrel, besides not tasting all that different from other meat, was actually kind of good. This discovery saddened me, particularly because I’d hoped my entire life that I would never find out what it tasted like in the first place—a hope I had never even realized until that point.

After our meal, we spent the rest of the day walking around the woods and looking for things to do. Our choices were very limited; climb a tree, rip up some leaves, make a mound of dirt and plant a little flag in it as if we were five-year-olds playing in a sandbox. And while the idea was charming, I had a feeling it wouldn’t divert us for long. So we mainly sat around, seeing how far we could look past the trees from one spot until our vision gave out. I remembered all too quickly that Hodek couldn’t blink when I was about to propose a staring contest.

Eventually, dusk arrived like it always would. The day couldn’t have gone by any slower, and oddly enough, the boredom almost revved me up. I was itching to go out and be in a more open space, to run around and climb the wall of some random person’s house. Hodek’s excitement was definitely more restrained than mine. I guessed that he’d experienced many days like this before, what with being on the run. I wondered why I had a harder time dealing with it than him.  _ Maybe he’s just better at hiding it. Like everything else. _

Looking out from the clearing and towards the setting sun, I decided to take a seat just outside the woods and start mapping out any possible routes from there. Eventually, though, my mind drifted elsewhere. Hodek sat down next to me and picked at the ground with his Swiss Army knife.

“You thinking?”

I nodded. “About what you said to Jane.”

He tapped the earth with a couple fingers, coming over all fidgety. “Which part?”

“When you were telling her not to hurt me.”

Hodek looked like he wanted to be annoyed with me, but couldn’t find the energy. “And what about it,” he muttered.

“Well, I thought it was sweet of you.”

“Hm. Let the record show that I, of all people, care about my partner getting killed by a vengeful teenage girl in a wig. Shocking.” He laid back and stretched out his arms. “You wouldn’t have been able to handle it, anyway.”

I had to stop myself from laughing. “Teenage? And you got your ass kicked by her  _ twice?” _ Though what I really wanted to say was,  _ Let the record show that you, of all people, care about me enough to remind her that you were the target.  _ Turning my attention back to the sunset, I now realized it had been a horrible decision to sit facing it. The light was about to blind me, and the heat made it unbearable to wear my mask for much longer. I tried shielding my eyes for a couple seconds, decided it was no longer worth it and took the thing off, heaving a sigh of relief. Hodek looked to me, probably to say something else, but stopped dead when he saw my face. I was about to ask if there was something off but then realized after a good minute that this was the first time in a while he’d seen me without my mask. He cleared his throat and turned back to face down the hill.

“Um. Thanks,” he muttered.

“For what?”

“You know…calling me ‘sweet,’ or whatever.” He sighed, resting his head on a hand. “I keep on forgetting. It’s almost like you’re a real person now, isn’t it?”

I raised an eyebrow. “What’s that supposed to mean? You don’t think I’m a  _ person?” _

“No, no, that wasn’t…it’s just, your mask. You wear it everywhere. This is, what, the second time you’ve taken it off around me? And the first time I could barely even see you. I just started looking at it as a part of your face.” He sighed and almost laughed. “I really thought…I thought that maybe, we were separate from the rest of the world. That we’re subhuman. Or even  _ above _ them. Either way, it’s weird to see you without that thing on.”

I didn’t have any kind of response for that, prepared or not. I could tell he was lying; he’d been killing for such a long time, I would be surprised if he didn’t see human life as miniscule. Insignificant. Maybe even a waste. But I didn’t want to push the subject any further, so I just let my head fall onto his shoulder. He eventually relaxed, but not before a brief period of frozen panic.

“…how can you trust me this much?”

I kept staring straight ahead as I considered that. “At this point, I don’t think I can afford not to. Staying with you hasn’t been great. But it’s been  _ nice _ . In my opinion, that’s really all we both need right now. Something nice.”

After a minute, Hodek scoffed and leaned onto me a little more. “You’re one of the stupidest people I’ve ever met.”

“But?”

“…at least it doesn’t leave much room for being a smartass. I don't know if I’ve already told you this, but Max, you’re okay.”

I looked down at my hands, thinking of my family. It felt almost wrong to say, but…

“Yeah. I am.”

I was about to close my eyes when I felt a sharp pain in my skull.


	30. Chapter 30

Hodek held me by the shoulders as I fell forward, clutching my head. I clenched my teeth and tried to open my eyes, but that only hurt more. “What the…?”

“Max, are you—”

“Not really,” I struggled to get out. “Why is this…Hodek, is there something in my head?!”

“I think I would’ve noticed by now. How bad is the pain? Can you walk?” There was a trace of panic in his voice as he tried propping me up again. I slowly nodded; it was starting to ebb away, anyways. Something was definitely still there but I could bear to stand up by myself. We got up and made for the bottom of the hill, and after a couple feet I couldn’t move any further. The pain came back, and it was even worse.

“No. Nope, no. Not this way. How… _ god,  _ I said not this way!” I snapped when he tried gently pushing me forward. He raised his eyebrows and held up his hands. “Okay,” he muttered, looking around and slowly dragging me back. Somewhere along that way, the screeching in my head completely cut off and I fell limp again, chest heaving. For a couple minutes, everything was silent. Looking back to him, I managed to say, “What the  _ hell  _ was that?”

“You think I know?! That was kind of all you. I—no, that doesn't matter. Are you okay  _ now?” _

Still breathing heavily, I thought about it. “…yeah. That…oh, my god. Something’s wrong about this place. I don’t know what, but—”

I was interrupted by a distant yell coming from the tunnel below us. It sounded like about ten or so people, crying out in pain. It stopped almost as soon as it started, and something urged me to go down there and find out what exactly had happened.

I sat up and leaned forward. Nothing. A couple more steps down the hill, and nothing. Without looking behind me, I made for the street that paralleled the forest we’d left and reached for my pliers. The underground lot had fallen completely silent, at least it seemed so from where I was positioned. I moved further down with Hodek on my tail. Despite everything I knew about him, this was definitely one adventure he didn’t want to embark on.

“Max.”

I ignored him and kept going. It turned out that what we had thought to be some underground parking station was really more of a cave than anything. The walls were bumpy and eroded, a job far too messy to be intentional or even man-made. Dirt and dust lay in a thick coating on the ground; all traces of plant life abruptly stopped at a line near the entrance. Strangely, I had the feeling that it didn’t have anything to do with how much sunlight was able to reach the grass there. Placing my hand on the outside concrete, I could feel that something was in constant motion under our feet. Maybe a giant machine. Maybe other people.

I heard distant voices echoing from the tunnel-like cave, and crept inside to try and make out what they were saying.

“Max, what are you doing?” Hodek half-whispered, reluctantly following me into the dark. “We’re barely armed, we don’t even know if there’s anyone in there…this is beyond stupid!”

“Well, then you don’t have to go in here with me,” I muttered, almost to myself. I didn’t look back to see if he had heard me, but from the silence that followed, I could tell I’d struck a nerve. I considered apologizing, but then thought it could be left for later. I pressed myself flat against the nearest wall, put my mask back on, and listened in to what seemed like someone’s frustrated rant.

_ “…another one of those idiotic teenagers. Oh, no, not you. The  _ bad _ kind. Do they even have half a brain each, or do they split it among themselves?” _

That earned a couple of muffled laughs from whoever was inside there with them. I narrowed my eyes. That voice sounded familiar. The noise in the back of my head was starting to ring a bell, too. I walked farther down towards what I assumed to be the source. Another voice interrupted, soft but strained.

_ “What if it’s the police again?” _

Everything fell silent at once. Even Hodek seemed to notice this. “Do they know we’re here?”

“They know  _ someone _ is,” I whispered, reaching back and tugging on the arm of his sweater. He leaned forward and tried eavesdropping, too.

_ “It’s fine. It’s fine! We’ve got the upper hand anyway, right?” _

_ “Do we, though…?” _

_ “Oh, don’t give me that. We’ve been…Garde, stop it!”  _ One of the voices added through gritted teeth, as if they didn’t want anybody else to hear that. Somebody else piped up.

_ “Wait, you didn’t bring anybody else with you, did you?” _

_ “Huh? Oh, um, no. I didn’t  _ bring  _ anyone else.” _

_ “Then stop talking to yourself, somebody is  _ clearly  _ trying to get in. Just two people, if I had to guess, but it’s still not good.” _

I froze up at that. Had our whispers given us away that much, or were our footsteps enough? Was it just easier to hear these things underground? I made the mistake of stepping forward again, and the second mistake of keeping Hodek latched onto me. We fell straight off a ledge of some sorts, letting out one yelp before landing. Painfully. No more than two seconds later, I heard mechanical whirring and a loud blast of steam over my head. I looked up. A metal door was closing, many feet above us. Hodek tried standing up, and a  _ crack  _ echoed through the dark as he winced and fell back down.

“No. No, no no no…!” He reached up with one hand towards the vanishing daylight, fully aware he wasn’t going to make it. As pitch black fully surrounded us, he sighed and let his arm drop to the side.

“Fuck.” A pause. “Well, it’s been a good run, partner.”

“Okay, I don’t think we’re going to  _ die  _ in here. Just let me—”

A tiny light in the corner of my eye flickered on. After a moment I expected blinding overheads to follow suit, but it was just the one for about five minutes. At least we could see now. Neither of us wanted to move; after all, the impact had rendered our legs nearly immobile. I was willing to bet that after a couple minutes the pain would fade and we could walk again. At least, I would have been if there was time to think about that right now.

“They’re here,” somebody muttered from beyond the light’s reaches. My heart started racing as I heard faint static accompanying their voice. I couldn’t place exactly why, it felt more like a recollection than instinctual fear.

“Of course they are, the door’s closed. Why…why aren’t they moving?” An impatient woman’s voice spoke just a little bit louder than her friend, cutting through the silence. I clenched my hand into a fist, trying to get a firm grip on the ground. This was completely stone; any dust sticking to my hand was probably from the aboveground platform.

After another failed attempt to stand up, the woman whispered, “Shh! Stay. Perfectly. Still,” although it didn’t seem like she was addressing us just yet. I heard shuffling feet and murmuring too soft for me to comprehend. I was tempted to call out and ask these people what they wanted, but before I could do anything one stepped out of the shadows and grabbed my face as if they were examining me. From the sounds of struggling beside me, it seemed they were doing the same to Hodek.

“A mask,” the person said blankly. They sounded intrigued. Surprised, maybe, but nothing more. They dug a finger underneath to lift it, took one look at my face in whole (not a great experience on my part) and flinched away from me as if I’d burned them. I took the opportunity to locate Hodek in the half-dark and yank him away from whoever was trying to get a good look at him, but it seemed he’d already fought them off. He shifted back and closed a hand over mine, looking just as confused as me. I glanced around, my vision starting to adjust. Three silhouettes towered over us, more curious than malevolent.

“What? What did you see?” The woman asked. Somebody beside her—the one who examined me, I guessed—was struggling to get their thoughts out.

“Well, ma’am, it’s…you know the file you showed me about a year ago?”

“Spit it out, Handle, which one?”

“Uh, th-the one you said was  _ missing,  _ not dead. Blueish mask, kinda flashy—”

“Flashy?” I echoed incredulously. Hodek squeezed my hand, almost crushing it.

“Shut up, shut  _ up, _ ” he said through gritted teeth. The whole cavern was silent for almost a minute. My pulse was racing, despite everything else being completely still. This was more nerve wracking than facing death itself, partially because I had no idea what these people wanted with us. Now that we’d stumbled into their territory, there was no going back.

The woman, who was now about five feet from us, seemed unable to form words. She still wasn’t completely visible, the only thing reflecting any light was a bow tie fastened not around any type of collar, but directly onto her neck. She crouched down and reached to touch my face. This time, it was gentle and hopeful rather than cold and unfeeling. Her hand was chestnut brown and the fingertips were calloused beyond anything real, but I didn’t push it away. Something was finally coming back to me. It was on the tip of my tongue. She spoke before me, her voice hoarse and rising a couple pitches.

“Masquerade?”

My eyes began welling up with tears as I remembered.

Anniversary.


	31. Chapter 31

I’m not sure why, but when I recognized her, the first thing I said was, “Let me stand up.” Maybe I thought she, or somebody else here, had been responsible for our hurt legs. In a way, they kind of were. Her hand snapped away from my face, and she pointed at some unknown person in the dark and flicked her finger upward. At once, every light in the room turned on, and I shielded my eyes. Hodek did the same, turning his face away from the ceiling.

About ten more people occupied this room, some of them vaguely familiar and some completely new. Once more, I tried standing up, and was finally able to. I leaned down to offer Hodek a hand, and he reluctantly accepted my help. I noticed there were clumps of dirt around his left eye, probably from the fall. I was about to point it out, but he gave me a sideways glance and shook his head before I could even lift a finger. I turned my attention back to Anniversary—my sister, my best friend, who I had not seen in seven years.

“Anni, I…” Anything I had planned to say when this day finally came was gone. It had evaporated before it could even reach my teeth, and I was left completely speechless. It seemed she was, too. All we did was stare until somebody in what I remembered to be the standard patrol uniform tapped her on the arm.

“Uh, what exactly am I looking at now?”

“Don’t be rude,” she hissed at them without hesitation. I was taken aback by the ferocity in her voice; usually, that was reserved for when something  _ really  _ got on her nerves, and she would never snap in front of someone on-duty. The patrol soldier just held up their hands and raised their eyebrows.

“Sorry, ma’am, I just wasn’t informed. We weren’t expecting anyone back at this time of day, and—”

“Does it look like  _ I  _ expected this?”

“Oh, wow…” a small voice caught my attention, and I looked down to see a young girl circling me and tugging on various parts of my clothes. “So it  _ is  _ you. We thought you were dead!” She commented with just a little too much glee in her voice. I raised an eyebrow, giving my best attempt at a polite smile.

“Um, sorry, do I know you?”

Too late. She had already been diverted by someone else—the man who had lifted my mask in the dark. “Handle! You lied to me, he’s not  _ that  _ pale,” she complained.

“That was before he was taken aboveground, Garde. Now leave him alone, aren’t you supposed to be in bed?”

“Anni said any eight available  _ patrols.  _ That’s what I am! I mean, I’m gonna be—!”

She let out a squeak of protest as Handle hoisted her up by the waist and started carrying her away. It was a little uncomfortable to realize just then that since I’d been gone, people would have their own different ideas of me based on hearsay, my file, and what I’d been like before the old base was cleared out. Somebody who never knew me then could have an opinion on me now. Hodek had managed to stay by my side this whole five minutes, and I wondered: if I just felt disconcerted by that idea, what would it be like to have my face plastered on countless internet forums and news channels?

“Masquerade.”

Anni’s voice called me back to earth. It had been so long since I heard that name spoken out loud. And on top of that, it was more difficult than I’d imagined to see my sister like this. She was far older than I remembered, though that was a given considering all the time we’d spent apart. She still had a trace of her teenage attitude but most of that had been shoved aside by years of sleepless nights, searching for her immediates and giving orders she wasn’t sure would help. That one look I shared with her was enough to tell me everything she had to go through in order to get here. I only hoped she could see what I’d endured, too.

Anniversary paused, looking me up and down before coming to a single conclusion.

“You grew out your hair.”

“I like it like this,” I responded automatically. I had a feeling there was more she wanted to say, but based on the way she glanced around at our company, she might have built up some kind of strong, emotionless name for herself in our family. It wouldn’t have been wise to break that now, of all times. She just cleared her throat and gestured beside me. “Uh, who is…?”

“I feel like there are more pressing matters at hand than who I might’ve brought here with me. But if you have to know  _ now _ , Hodek here is my—”

“Friend!” He cut me off, placing a hand abrasively on my shoulder. I turned my head and raised an eyebrow, but he didn’t look my way. He kept staring straight ahead, like if he took his eyes off of Anni she would do something. I glanced back at her, not exactly sure where to go from here.

“…right. My friend.”  _ What did he think I was going to say? _ “On second thought, maybe it’s better if we talk somewhere else. Who are these people?” My eyes scanned the various guards that were now surrounding us, inching closer by the second like at any moment they’d be ordered to attack. Anni sighed and flicked her wrist in the air, which caused every other person in the room to stand up straight with their arms practically glued to their sides. I flinched at the sudden and collective movement, whereas Anniversary simply walked up and placed a hand on my shoulder.

“They’re your new brothers and sisters. Well…I say  _ new  _ like they came here just yesterday. Most of them have been here for quite a while, actually.”

My eyes were being drawn all around, from one recruit to the next, finally resting on Anni again with another realization.

“…you’re the new Elder?”

She smiled, almost like she felt sorry about it. “You flatter me, Masquerade. As if  _ anyone  _ could replace the Elder.” She looked around quickly and then muttered in my ear, “Yeah, pretty much. Isn’t it exciting!”

“Are you sure? You look really tired. It’s…kind of a big deal.”

“And there you go again. You’ve always been the worrywart of us, haven’t you, Masquie? Oh, it’s so good to have you back,” she said with a much more forced grin than before. I got the feeling that instead, she wanted to break down and cry. Before I could say anything else, she clasped her hands and addressed the rest of the room. “Well, looks like it was a false alarm. Your older brother and I are going to discuss some things in private, and in the meantime you all should be getting ready for bed.” She took one step forward, and suddenly everybody had much better things to do than stick around here. I knit my eyebrows.

“Commanding the new ones with an iron fist? That doesn’t sound like you, Anni,” I said quietly, watching as the crowd around us dispersed. She sighed, folding her arms.

“I wish it wasn’t like that, to tell the truth. I try to be nice, I really do. But I guess we’re all just a little tightly wound from the last couple of years.”

I couldn’t have agreed more. Without the Elder in charge, there was bound to be chaos.  _ Who knew that when the dust had settled, Anniversary would be the one to lead us? _

“Well, come on,” she said after a minute, grabbing my arm. “We need to talk. About a  _ lot _ .”

“Oh. O-of course, but what about…”

“Your friend can wait outside with one of the guards. If any are even available,” she muttered to herself, pressing a button on her bow tie and looking to the doorway expectantly. Within a second five younger-looking guards stood before us. I managed to spot a familiar face, and told him to watch over Hodek. It was weird to be the one giving orders, and even weirder treating Hodek like some sort of prisoner. I reminded myself over and over in my head that this wasn’t the case as Anni dragged me to her new office.

[JEFF]

What the hell was Max thinking, leaving me out here with some string bean of a guard to tell people to leave me alone. I felt like a kid waiting outside the principal’s office, and probably looked the part, too. I kept shifting my gaze all around the hallway, watching people go by, point, whisper, whatever could make me feel more out of place.

_ Get your shit together, Hodek. _ Not a second after thinking that, I closed my eyes and quietly groaned to myself.  _ Great. Now  _ I  _ can’t even say my first name. Stupid guy got in my head. _

“Well, it looks like you might be staying here a while.”

My little chaperone—Jade, Max had told me—finally spoke after what must have been five minutes. I twitched at the sudden break in silence. “What?”

He turned to me, perplexed. “What, you didn’t hear? Masquerade said…” he seemed to realize something, glanced down at my neck, and made a small, disapproving sound. “Oh. We’re going to have to do something about  _ that _ .”

Needless to say, I didn’t like the way he phrased that. I wasn’t so sure if I could take him down in a fight—string bean or not. He was almost the exact same size as Max and looked even more intimidating, though he obviously wasn’t trying to. I bit my cheek, remembering how that lucky bastard managed to wound me bad enough to stay in my home for a night.

_ Less than ten minutes in this place and you’re already sizing people up for combat. This is why you don’t make any friends. _

Shut up. I’ve got Max, that’s enough.

_ And how are you so certain of that? Don’t you think that after a couple of days here, he’ll have forgotten about you entirely? _

I said, shut  _ up. _ Get out. I’m not dealing with this right now.

“Sounds like they’re wrapping up, uh…Hodek, was it?”

Jade’s voice pulled me out of my own head, catching me off guard again. “Sure,” I muttered, not bothering to ask how he knew what Max and that girl were even talking about. The door they were behind seemed pretty soundproof to me. Maybe I just had a dull ear. He fixed me with a strange look, somewhere between pity and confused disgust. Whatever I was doing (there wasn’t much I could point out to you), I was doing something wrong. I decided to focus on the exposed pipes above my head rather than what this  _ literal stranger _ thought of me.

_ Does he even know who I am? _


	32. Chapter 32

[MASQ]

Anni was quick to lock the door, and discouraged me from sitting down. She let out a tiny sigh as she looked me up and down again.

“Alright. First order of business…”

Without so much as a blink she had me in a bone-crushing hug, and I held in tears as I hugged her back.

“It’s really good to see you again, Masquerade,” she muttered into my shoulder. Her voice was hoarse and weak, like she was just able to hold herself together. “I’m sorry I was acting so weird about things back there, but…you know how it is.”

“I guess I do. You just always have to be the strong one, whether you like it or not, right?”

She sighed and let go. “I don’t want to sound like I’m complaining or anything. It helps the family. I’ve gotta be that stone, y’know?”

I nodded, secretly wondering if the Elder has ever felt like that. I wondered whether leading us had been the easiest thing in the world to her, or if she was just that good of an actress. As odd as it sounds, Anni seemed a little too human to be the Elder.

A sudden thought crossed my mind, hopeful and fleeting. I was still able to catch it.

“Anni, if you’re here, does that mean…did Birthday—”

I stopped at the look on her face when I said his name. She almost seemed to wince, as if I’d rubbed salt on a wound.

“No. It doesn’t mean that, Masquie. I was lucky enough to be able to escape my imposter, but…that doesn’t mean all of us were. Birthday got caught. Multiple times. He never hid fast enough, he thought he could fight them off, but it would always be too late.”

I let all that sink in. I felt horrible for wishing he was here too, for being ungrateful of everything else that had happened today. But the family felt empty without Birthday here to joke, to be kind, to give others a shoulder to cry on. He was the warmth of our fire, not the wood that fed it. I rolled up my sleeves to the elbows and hugged both of my arms.

“I think I still remember his song. The one he made for me.”

Anni nodded, though I expected her to jokingly say, “not _just_ for you.” After all, he’d written her a verse, too. But we both knew that the original was meant to make me feel better about something I wasn’t particularly proud of back then. Whatever else he added was to help me feel less alone.

“That makes the both of us,” she muttered. “I mean, I can barely remember five words. But sometimes that tune just gets stuck in my head.”

After a couple more minutes of bittersweet nostalgia, we both decided to put it all to rest. We needed to focus on the future; specifically speaking, how Hodek would fit into everything.

“He has to stay. At least for a little bit,” I said, completely sure of myself for once. Maybe this wasn’t the plan I had since the beginning of my search, but I wasn’t going to leave him behind now. Anni looked doubtful.

“He _has_ to? I don’t see why, if he’s just your friend. Exactly how long have you known him?”

“Long enough. Besides, we…” I trailed off, weighing my options here. Hodek clearly didn’t want it to be known that we were anything more than friends. But Anni knew how to keep a secret, and she was fine with the fact that I happened to like guys in _that_ way.

_No. Better to just stick with what’s already been said. Besides, maybe he’s lying for protection, or in case Angus hears and decides to…_

I shook my head, frustrated at myself for taking this long to figure things out.

_No, he definitely knows at this point. Why am I getting so worked up over this? It’s only a few words, why can’t I just spit them out?!_

“…we can be more efficient with him around,” I said eventually, my gaze never staying locked on the same place. Anniversary sighed as if she were just as disappointed in me as I was. As if she could hear each and every one of my thoughts as I arrived at that lame excuse of a reason to keep him around. Not that I was lying; if she’d seen some of the things he’s done with a knife he would have his own completed file before you could say, “by the way, this is Jeff the Killer we’re talking about.” Either way, she nodded in that adult, _I’ll think about it_ way and reached up to brush a lock of hair out of my eyes—well, mask.

“Alright. I’d feel terrible for getting in between you two, anyway. I’m going to see if I can find a couple more vacant rooms for you, though I’m sure it won’t be so difficult,” she added with a small forced laugh. It must have been hard to find old recruits and gain new ones after the police had found our previous base. Again, I could see the stress and tension in her eyes, never fading. I nodded and hugged her once more.

“Thanks, Anni. I promise, you’ll see soon enough how useful he can be.” It felt wrong to talk about Hodek like he was some tool, and the words left a bitter taste in my mouth. Still, I was able to hide that pretty well and she opened the door to reveal that fortunately, neither Hodek nor his guard, Jade, had killed one another.

“Took you long enough,” he muttered, eyes shifting around the hall. It looked like he’d kept his arms folded the entire time, as if holding himself back from violence. As we walked down to where Anni directed us, he leaned toward me and asked even quieter, “Exactly how long is this going to last, anyway? This place gives me the creeps, and this is _me_ you’re talking to.”

I looked around at my old—well, new—home. It had definitely been…industrialized, to an extent. Pipes covering every inch of the ceiling would periodically hiss with steam. Electric lanterns jabbed the walls with harsh, bright light every 50 feet and seemed to flicker if you stared too long. These halls were lifeless, even the real people coming and going from their rooms could only hold up the illusion for so long. I felt like I was in an abandoned hospital.

“It just takes a little getting used to. That’s all,” I settled with, squinting my eyes as I tried to decipher Anni’s handwriting on the slip of paper she gave me.

“C011…and C014.” Looking up, I saw that we’d arrived at my room first. After a moment, I turned to Jade, who had followed us here in complete silence. “I think that’s all we need. You can go and continue anything you were doing before, if you want.”

He stared blankly at me for a couple seconds before closing his eyes and walking away with a soft “Yes, sir.” Hodek raised an eyebrow, not taking his gaze off the door.

“So it’s ‘sir’ for you too now, eh?”

“I suppose. What is this tag even made of?” I turned my attention to the label next to my room’s doorway, reaching out to feel it. “It looks like a hammered out piece of metal—oh, no.”

At the slightest touch, one of its corners came loose from the wall and it hung by a thread. Or, well, a bolt. My hand flinched away, while Hodek let out something of a chuckle.

“Wow. They really held it together without you, didn’t they…?”

He faltered at my glare. “Uh. Sorry.”

I sighed and hooked the label’s detached end back onto whatever tiny nail was sticking out of the wall, waiting a few seconds to make sure it stayed. I pushed the door open to reveal a room that was almost completely empty, besides the basics: a bed, nightstand, and one shelf to the side to place your belongings. I thought for a moment I could spot two holes in the wall next to me, where maybe a picture frame used to hang. But not anymore.

What felt like a minute passed, where everything was still and silent. I took a breath and untied my twine and pliers from my belt line, placing them on the table by my new bed.

“Home,”  I said without any clear reason. There was no need to expand upon it. Hodek nodded after a few seconds, like he understood entirely. The memory of when he first offered to help me, after we had been forced to abandon the trapdoor, began playing on repeat in my head.

_“Just don’t thank me until we actually get there.”_

I looked at him thoughtfully, and when our eyes met he gestured towards the doorway with a cautious but amused look on his face.

“Are we done here, or…?”

“You want me to go to your room with you.” I had meant that to come out as a question, but giving him the option of admitting it seemed a little cruel, somehow. He scoffed and folded his arms again.

“Look, if I open that door and somebody tries to jump out and kill me, you’re my witness. Maybe then you’d believe that—” he cut himself off and looked to the side, before turning around with a sigh. “Actually, I’m gonna keep that last part to myself. Let’s go. You…you are coming with me, right?”

“Sure.”

[JEFF]

Of course, now that this was _my_ new living space we were standing in, I was going to pay attention a little more. The one thing that stuck out the most was that this room was more stable and probably more sanitary than anything I’d lived in for years. It was definitely a nice change, albeit an unsettling one. As I set the single knife I’d brought with me on a shelf identical to Max’s, I couldn’t help but find this whole thing way too convenient.

“Home sweet home,” I said dryly, running my fingertips over the wall’s chipping paint and laughing. “Y’know what, I take back what I said about this place being creepy. I feel like I’m in a hotel.” I looked around the room, impressed this “family” had been able to hold up for as long as it did.

“So, I guess I’m gonna hold off on kicking your ass for almost _breaking_ both of our legs with that fall, huh?”

When I got no response, I turned around, faltering. “Max? You okay?”

He stared at me for…an uncomfortably long time, to be honest. I couldn’t tell for the life of me what he was thinking, but if I had to guess at the moment, it wasn’t anything good. My worries were short-lived, though, because after an agonizing fifteen seconds he pulled me into a tight hug, burying his face in my shoulder like he was about to cry.

_Oh. He’s just in one of these moods._

I heard a muffled “Thank you, Hodek” in the silence, and without much thought I started hugging him back. “What do you mean…?”

“You helped me. You helped me find my family.” His voice was practically a croak, and I felt a pang of sympathy. I was suddenly ready to forgive almost everything he’d put me through to get here. After all, didn’t he have to endure those things, too?

I didn’t enjoy the silence of embracing all that much, but there wasn’t a lot to say. So I kept my mouth shut and looked off to the side, trying my best to recreate the sensation of closing my eyes. No dice. Before the moment could have become any more awkward, he sighed and let go of me but held onto one of my hands. A strange warmth crept into my face, and I instinctively jerked my arm back. Max cocked his head.

“Oh.”

Honestly, I didn’t even know why I did that. It was probably years of fighting reflexes kicking in, and right now I wished they weren’t there to begin with. His face, again, didn’t show any emotion behind the mask, making it even more difficult to tell what I should do next.

_Goddammit. Why does he have to wear that thing all the time? Why can’t I just see what he’s feeling for once?_

“No, I didn’t…” I stumbled over my words, and after a moment just took his hand again.

“This is fine. You’re fine, I just—”

“Are you sure?” Instead of hurt, Max simply sounded worried. I nodded and clenched my jaw, though I couldn’t place why I felt so anxious about all this.

“Yeah. I’m not exactly used to being…friends with someone. But it’s a nice change. Like you said; we just need something nice.”

He seemed to buy that. And for a short while, I did too.


	33. Chapter 33

Since the day had just begun (fucked up sleep schedule or not, I wasn’t about to argue with these people) we were called back after settling in to get…assigned, I guess you could say. Max told me that before he was separated from them, he’d been a scout tasked with “location and recovery” which is just a nicer way of saying he basically kidnapped people. I was tempted to laugh, but then realized that being a bodyguard or patrol member wouldn’t have put him to much better use.

When we reached whatever room we’d been called to, the girl, Anniversary, was…kind of all over me. Not in a gross way, she just couldn’t be controlled as she sized up every little piece of me for a job. She didn’t seem the least bit bothered by my scars, which was relieving but also sort of unsettling. If I wasn’t the strangest case she’d seen in a while, then what was?

“Fascinating. Just… _fascinating!”_ She tapped her chin with what looked to be a small, red computer chip. “Masquerade, you sure picked a good one, didn’t you?”

“Uh, I’m not sure if ‘pick’ would be the right—”

“Of course, of course. I might have to put off _temporarily_ assigning him just yet, I hope you understand. But…” her face sobered, and without hesitation she began tracing portions of my carved smile like she was painting it on.

“You poor thing. What you must have gone through out there…I can’t even imagine it!” She said _out there_ as if the outside world could be nothing but violent and cruel. Not exactly the mindset I’d expected from someone with her demeanor. And on top of that, she was addressing me with such pity that I didn’t even know how to react. I looked to Max, who was slowly shaking his head in warning. What exactly he was trying to warn me about, I had no idea. I just wanted this to be over with.

“Um. Sure. Remind me what this place does, again? Like, you guys must have some sort of business to stay alive.”

“Good question,” the woman said while placing a thermometer underneath Max’s tongue. He was standing so perfectly still that he could’ve blended into the wall after a couple minutes. I was still waiting on a real answer when Anniversary walked back over to me, fastened something to my wrist and pat me on the back, like, _you’re free to go._

“Now, if you two stand here any longer you might miss training. Fortunately, we had just enough ‘undetermined’ markers for you not to get any weird looks. So you’d better get going.”

I looked down at the band she’d given me. It was like one of those plastic-papery bracelets they give you at amusement parks that are impossible to get off, only I spied a metal clip on one side of it. It was black all around, with a small letter _U_ painted next to the clip in white. I raised an eyebrow, but didn’t think to comment on anything.

“Thank you, Anniversary,” Max said, seemingly by habit, putting his hands on his hips with a black band of his own. He turned to me, a tiny smile about to break through the stoniness. “Let’s go, Hodek. I’ve got a _lot_ to show you.”

We first headed for one of the several training halls, where we were greeted by some girl who was dressed almost identically to Max wielding a clipboard and a large cardboard box.

“You’re late for the 9:15 period, if that’s what you’re here for. It should only be a couple…”

She trailed off when we came into full view, and quickly shook her head. “Oh. Of course. She told me there’d be two more coming. Well.” She held out the box and shook it, contents rattling loudly inside.

“Go on. Or do you need to be assigned those, as well?”

“Nice to see you too, Candy. I’m actually not sure if mine’s still recorded. It’s probably not, after all this time,” Max said, looking at the box with a trace of doubt. “Do I just pick one?”

I shifted forward to see what they were even talking about. The box was chock-full of various metal weapons, rusty and blunt from years of use. Peeking out from under one layer was what appeared to be…

_A bow tie?_

“I’ll have to check lists anywhere from 2010 to 2015, but for now you can settle with any of these. You men got a lucky batch, Garde didn’t try sneaking a second wrench off me this time.” The girl said this with a shameless smirk, her gaze piercing the space between my eyes as if she thought I might do the same. My hand hovered over the weapons, unsure.

“…oh. Wait, I don’t need any of those. I have—”

I started checking my hoodie pocket, struck by a realization, only to find that it was empty. I remembered just as quickly where my knife actually was.

“…nevermind. Left the thing in my room. I guess I’ll take whatever you got,” I said with a sigh. The girl cocked her head, looking just a tiny bit annoyed.

“You know, you’re going to have to submit any weapons you brought here to this division. I—”

Suddenly, her body stiffened, and I could’ve sworn that a tiny electrical spark was visible somewhere on her neck. I noticed she was wearing the very same kind of tie I’d seen in the box she was holding. She grimaced, then rubbed her head as if she’d just woken up.

“Right. Of course. Your new policy. My _apologies,_ ma’am.” Although the strange emphasis on _apologies_ was enough to convince me she wasn’t sorry at all. She pursed her lips, dug around in the cardboard box for a good second and then pressed something into my hand.

A small, practically useless switchblade.

I glanced back and forth between her and the knife, hoping my internal loop of _Are you serious?_ was able to reach her. She gave me an exasperated look.

“You were taking too long to pick, anyway. Now go, both of you.” She stepped aside and held open the door for us, making sure to give Max a super gracious “welcome back” smile before shooting me a dirty look. One that probably said, _I couldn’t give two shits if_ he _trusts you; you’re an outsider._

“Have fun.”

“Will do,” I muttered, already getting a feel for my knife. Dull as it was, I could work with it. I noticed Max had picked up something oddly reminiscent of his old pliers. Something told me it wasn’t even a real tool that had been patented and sold to people; based on the awkward way the strips of metal were welded together, I would’ve said this was something of the cult’s, maybe even his own invention.

“Man, what is that girl’s deal with me?” I resisted the urge to look back and give her the finger, while Max simply held onto a small patch of my sleeve as if he expected me to do exactly that.

“Trust me—whatever happens, you just _don’t_ get on the weapon handler’s bad side.”

“Why not? It’s not like she—”

“Controls it all? Yeah, she kind of does. So when somebody pisses her off, that happens,” he said, pointing to the switchblade in my hand. I flicked it open and closed.

“And so what? I could always just steal a better one. You heard what she said about that…uh, god, I’m blanking. Somebody named Garde?”

“You mean me?”

I positively jumped at a tiny voice right beside us, seeming to come from around the height of my knees. Well, maybe that’s an exaggeration. The little girl that had just popped up from out of nowhere was only able to reach my waist, even with the sheer height of her hair. She was clearly hiding a mischievous grin behind a look of innocent curiosity.

_“You’re_ that new guy Masquerade brought here for us!”

_“For you?”_ I repeated incredulously. Max sighed, though with a sense of fondness.

“Try not to bother him too much, Garde, I know you stole something from Candy to use anyway.”

“That’s not true.”

“Wait, wait, I thought you two didn’t even know each other before today. Can someone please tell me what’s going on…?” I grappled for any and all knowledge I’d gathered from these people in the last couple of hours, though not much of it would’ve been useful. Max shrugged.

“Just because I don’t ‘know’ someone doesn’t mean I can’t _know_ them. I mean, look at her, she’s basically an Event 2.0.”

“Do I look like I have any idea who that is.”

Garde skipped ahead, turning around so she could face us while she walked. “That’s what Jade says, too. You really were a part of us, weren’t you?”

Max’s smile faded only slightly. “What do you mean, _were?”_

Garde laughed and ran along towards what looked to be an old target range. Except there were no fences, bows, quivers, not even a line on the ground to show people where to stand. After a couple more seconds of looking around, I understood; this place was the entire training area. Those targets on the walls were for all weapons, all forms of combat, and they had all been demolished a long time ago. I looked down at the knife in my hand, then to Max. He seemed to have recovered from Garde’s little comment and was now straightening up his shirt. Seeing him now, compared to all these other people, was making my head spin.

_This place is definitely carving its members into human war machines, that I know. So why did they pick…_

“That kid should _not_ be here,” I said, mostly to myself. Max’s eyes scanned the room as he considered that.

“Well, there are always going to be troublemakers. We just have to deal with it.”

_Not what I meant._

With that out of the way, we both started training.

* * *

 It was definitely jarring to hear him work with and talk to these people like they were age-old friends, which they probably were, if I’m being honest. Who knew he’d be popular _anywhere,_ let alone a crumbling and delusional “family” like this? I tried ignoring all the blaring alarms in my head at practically anything that happened, but I knew I wouldn’t be able to keep it up for long.

“Max,” I said when we finally arrived back to my room, “this is going to come as a huge shock for you, I’m sure, but I have a really weird feeling about this place.”

“And I told you, you just have to give it a chance. It really didn’t use to be like this. Well, it sort of did, but you know what I mean, right?”

“You could’ve at least warned me that all this ‘training’ stuff took up more than half of the day. It’s like we’re in the military.”

“Hodek, is this too much for you?” He said it like he could hardly believe his ears. I scoffed.

“Oh, I can handle it. I’m thinking more like, the way this schedule works is shifty as fuck? And you get…what, mealtimes and maybe five extra minutes as a break?”

“Plus sleeping,” he protested.

_Way worse that you had to mention that, but okay._ “That’s definitely not right. I mean…you realize some of these people are kids. You _have_ to know that, at least.”

“Toughen up, would you?” He was almost laughing. “That’s just how it is here. It’s what it was like for me, and I didn’t think to complain. Most of what we do has to circle back to the family, and what’s best for it. Didn’t your parents teach you anything like that?”

“They didn’t teach Liu and I to feed into some weird, underground hive mind 24/7, no.”

“Ha, ha. You know, if anybody else heard that there would’ve been some problems.”

“I’m sure.”

He must’ve noticed something about the way I was looking around the room, because the conversation took a very quick turn.

“Are you surprised?”

I thought about that for a second. “ _Surprised_ isn’t really the word I’d use, but I guess.”

“You didn’t think we’d ever find them, did you.”

That caught me off guard. I arched an eyebrow and tried to decipher Max’s expression. Again, the poker face. Again, I hated that. I groaned. “You’re trapping me, aren’t you?”

“I just want an honest answer.”

There was an oddly long pause. After something akin to a staring contest, I gave in and sighed. “Yeah. I didn’t. Could you blame me, though? We were following your gut, maybe a trail or two, I didn’t think it would actually land us anywhere. It kind of just amounted to…‘quality time’ or whatever they call it. At least, it did to me.”

Max leaned his head against the doorframe like he didn’t know what to make of me right now. “As flattering as that is, Hodek, it was a little stupid of you to think you could just keep me all to yourself.”

“That wasn’t—I never said _that._ ” I was getting annoyed with all this _I’m going to tell you exactly how you’re feeling_ bullshit, though what he’d just suggested was enough to make my face grow uncomfortably warm. I scratched at the side of my neck, a little too aware of what was happening here. In hindsight, probably still not aware enough.

“…could we not talk about this? Please?” I was genuinely asking this time. For all I knew, everybody in this underground cult could have my head in three seconds flat if they wanted. Max seemed to notice the nervousness in my voice, because his face softened up a little bit.

“Okay. I was just teasing, you know.”

“Yeah, I do, it’s just that…ugh.” I couldn’t find the words to explain why it felt so weird just now. He nodded thoughtfully.

“I get it. I’ll call you when they have dinner ready.”


	34. Chapter 34

Nighttime. Some week in April, and a real quiet one, too. I didn’t even want to be out here, but I was running low on non-expired food. I had finished on a good murder, skipped two more, and finally arrived at this house. I was ready to turn back and head in for the night, but he kept pushing me.

_“Trust me, Jeffrey, this one has everything you need. I checked.”_

“And whoever lives here…?”

_“Nobody does. I’ve decided to give you a little break. After all, I’m not_ completely _unfair.”_

I scoffed at thin air. “Like I need your permission to go into an empty house,” I muttered with more confidence than I actually had. After a brief pause, I was starting to wonder if he’d just left. I found myself thinking, _Don’t go now, goddammit! I’m out in the open, what if something—_

_“I’m right here. You should know better than to talk to me that way. Remind me, who is the human here and who—”_

“Right, right, I’m completely _helpless_ without your guidance! I’m going in. Don’t wait up.” I started grumbling nonsense to myself, knowing all too well that he was going to follow me inside whether I liked it or not. Since it was empty I had nothing to worry about, right?

Breaking in had been easy enough, though I could’ve said that for any house after three, maybe four years on the loose. I allowed myself to be a little louder than usual—only a _little_ , mind you. The one thing I really had to do was find a source of food, which is easier said than done when a house has nobody living in it. So I tried cutting down the search to just a couple minutes. It was the end of the night, after all, and daybreak always came earlier than the last in spring.

When I finally found what you could technically call a kitchen, I was met with pure disappointment. Sure, there was food. Half of it had gone bad. A single egg lay in the middle of the fridge’s top shelf, and I didn’t have the time to test if it was still good. So into the bag in went. Next was a quarter-full bag of grains, though I could hardly think of a real use for that other than a shitty bowl of oatmeal. Bagged. An apple core that had almost been picked clean. Maybe I could use it to draw some rodents in and eat _them_. Bagged.

Before I could scan anywhere else, though my hopes had dropped a significant amount, something creaked in another room. An upstairs room. I flinched, nearly dropping my bag of food.

“Show yourself, intruder.”

That sentence, coming from what was probably a skinny nobody, would've been snicker-worthy in any other situation. But right now my only hope was to stay completely silent. I’d blown it. I was too lenient, and Angus had…

_Oh, he totally lied. Again._

I resisted the urge to drive my knife into a cabinet, instead only drawing it and ducking behind the kitchen island. My heart began to race. This was very bad. I wasn’t ready to just _kill_ somebody again, he promised me a break!

“You said this house was empty…!” I whispered, anxiously awaiting some kind of explanation or at least a sign that he was still here. I heard a snide, _“Well, I had to say_ something _to keep you on edge,”_ and from the odd silence that followed I knew he had left me here. If that idiot victim had stayed quiet for five more seconds, I might have started crying.

“Hello? What are you doing in my house?!”

Their voice was cracked and strained, foiling any attempts they’d made to sound tough. A wave of bitterness washed over me, and before they could try any kind of empty threats I rose to my feet and faced them, the point of my knife inches from their throat.

“Go to sleep, _puttana._ ”

* * *

 I shuddered while crouching behind an abandoned house, several streets from where a dead thirty-something-year-old lay. I still wasn’t entirely used to it all; after my little high that lasted about a week when I was 20, something human seemed to reawaken inside me, and my senses couldn’t handle all that gore. My head was stuffed with images of freshly maimed corpses, children who deserved more of a future, good-hearted people who just happened to be in the wrong neighborhood that night. It was all starting to become too much. Of course, he didn’t care. He thought my resistance was cute. And like always, he appeared at my side five minutes later with that goddamn cheeky smile like he’d just played a _joke_ on me.

_“So it’s done.”_

My blood boiled with rage when I heard him, and I dared to raise my voice in the middle of the night while I was trying to make a clean getaway.

“What the hell was that, Angus?! You straight-up lie to me, _again,_ about this being some fun little off-night, claiming the house was empty, risking my life just so you can see one more person dead…”

I looked down at the sorry contents of the bag in my hand, and my anger grew stronger than ever before.

“…and on top of it all, you make me raid some place that can’t even afford dry cereal?! You—!”

I stopped talking when I caught sight of him again. Some parts of his form would flicker and distort, but the face and figure were recognizable enough. My stomach tied itself into a knot, and I balled up my free hand into a fist.

“…my brother. Really? So you’ve sunk that low now. Is this seriously some half-assed attempt to manipulate me again?”

_“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”_

“Well, joke’s on you anyways. He’s dead to me.”

Angus raised an eyebrow and smirked, reaching out to touch my arm. I swatted his hand away, feeling mild surprise when it worked.

“No. Don’t even follow me home this time, I’ve had enough of your games for one night. I’ve had enough for one lifetime, actually.”

_“Isn’t that what you said two months ago? And, uh,_ who _are you still standing here talking to?”_

“You’re the one that keeps crawling back! I’m sick of it! Don’t you have someone else to force into killing random people on the street? I can’t be the only one.”

_“Jeffrey, I’m shocked! You know that you’re my best and_ only _friend. And as for forcing…well, I don’t think I have to explain just how wrong you are about that.”_

“Cut the bullshit, Grimville. I’m going home, and don’t even _think_ about tagging along.”

I stormed off to my pathetic tin can of a shack, climbing inside and hugging my knees as I began thinking about how I would get my next real meal. Every now and then, a whisper of sound reached my ears, and I would frantically turn my head to find the source. But each time there was nothing, and I realized again and again just how alone I was.

_So he really did listen this time._

I felt sick to my stomach at that thought, only to shake my head and glare at nothing.

_No. I don’t need him. I never have. He’s been using me, tricking me, and now he’s gone. This is a good thing._

Tears started welling up in my eyes, and I knew better than to wipe them away.

_Why does that asshole still get to me?! I’ve been dealing with him for four years. I’ve had to put up with this bullshit to survive but to him it’s nothing. I’m just some toy, some proxy he can enact all his selfish deeds through. Yeah, maybe he helped me once, but…_

I racked through my mind, trying to make sense of all this. What could he possibly want from me anymore? If he wanted to kill he could just do it himself, right? The utter confusion only cut me deeper in the same place. I took a shaky breath—one step back from a full-on sob.

_I’m never working for him again. I’m never working for_ anyone. _I’ll never be anyone’s coffee fetcher, anyone’s assistant ever again._

My eyes were starting to sting, and more than usual. I clenched my teeth and shifted back to sit up, my nails digging into the earth.

“I’m Jeff the _fucking_ Killer.”

There might have been an insect or two crawling up my back. I couldn’t have cared less.

“I am in control.”

Now I felt like I was going to throw up. Good. It meant I’d eaten recently.

“And anybody I see either ends up dead, or works for _me._ ”

* * *

 I woke up to an empty night sky and suffocating warmth on every side of my body. It took much longer than you’d expect for me to realize I was staring at the ceiling, not the sky. I sat up and rubbed my head, the events of my dream—no, nightmare—no, _memory_ —already slipping away. How long ago had that been? The last night Angus and I had spent as a team, maybe even some twisted version of friends. It felt like decades now, though if I had to make a guess myself I would have said it was three years behind me.

My eyes were burning like they always did when I woke up. But it didn’t feel to me like it was daytime just yet; I must have jerked awake after only a few hours of rest. I tried to adjust to this new setting, but the more I looked at it, the less it felt like any kind of home. Even the shack, even the trapdoor felt safer than a heavily guarded underground base. The one other person I knew here was just a couple rooms down. And yet I couldn’t stop my heart from pounding out of my chest. A faint, ghostly glow in the corner of my eye caught my attention, and I turned to see a familiar silhouette standing a couple feet from my bed. He wasn’t doing anything, just staring as if he was waiting for me to react.

“…Max?” I said groggily. “What are you doing here? Isn’t it…”

All of my thoughts came to a screeching halt as one of his arms dissolved into nothing. I had to catch my breath and look down at one of my hands to ground myself in reality. _What the hell?_

“Max?” I repeated, my voice almost giving in to a whisper as I glanced back up. He raised a hand to his mouth and laughed. And it wasn’t his normal warm laughter; it was some twisted, chilling giggle that gave the impression he was watching a circus animal fail at its headline trick.

_“So I’ve still got it. Good to know, ‘Hodek.’”_

It wasn’t his voice.

I grabbed the knife on my desk and swung at Angus’s neck, but he disappeared before anything could be done. I knew in the back of my mind that I couldn’t hurt him either way, but I was sure it would make him leave me alone. At the very least, make it known that I was willing to destroy the image of my only friend if it meant a full night’s sleep.

“That whole impersonation thing’s getting immature at this point. You’d better fucking quit it now,” I said under my breath, aware he could hear me. I waited for a response, but nothing happened for the rest of the night. I was left sitting on my bed, facing the ground, a blunt knife in my hand about to drop. As good I was becoming at hiding these sorts of things, I knew at some point I was going to have to break.


	35. Chapter 35

[MASQ]

On one hand, I didn’t exactly want to walk in on Hodek while he was still asleep and have to look at his empty open eyes again. Seriously, whenever I see him sleeping there is no light behind them. It’s like he’s possessed. But on the other hand, if I didn’t wake him up now somebody else might. Besides, he could’ve gotten up earlier and just didn’t leave the room yet. I was willing to take my chances. I wasn’t sure why his eyes still unsettled me, though.

I gently knocked on the door, and was met with an irritated “What.”

“It’s me. They’re serving breakfast in, like, ten minutes. Can I come in?”

There was a long, strained pause.

“Yeah. Sure.”

As I walked in, I noticed he wasn’t moving from his spot. At all. He was keeping eerily still, like an animal being preyed on. I raised an eyebrow.

“Are you going to get up, or should I come back later.”

A few seconds passed before it looked like he’d processed that. He sighed and shook his head, glancing up at me. Something seemed to click inside his head, and without a word he stood up and slowly approached me, grabbing my hand and holding it up to his face like it would turn to dust if he stared at it long enough. There was an unusually crazed look in his eyes; he must not have gotten a minute of sleep.

“Hodek, are you okay? Did something happen last night?”

Eventually, he seemed to realize what he was doing and stepped back. “Um. Yeah, yeah, I’m fine. I was just thinking about a lot, and then I thought I saw something and…nevermind.” His eyes wandered to my shirt sleeve, and his expression melted into perplexity. “What are you wearing?”

“What do you mean? This is what I usually wear.”

“No, it looks newer. ‘Cept for all the cuts and tears, I guess.”

I looked down at myself, realizing just how worn down my clothes had gotten from all this time on the run. I  _ had  _ washed them last night, mainly because I was afraid I wouldn’t get another chance once today started. I shrugged.

“Just decided to get them cleaned. Come on, let’s go before we start gathering dust.”

I ignored Hodek’s muttered question of “Who says that anymore…?” and led him down the hall, toward what I had decided to call  _ the rays  _ within the first two days of being here. It was a circle in the middle surrounded by about nine tunnels going in different directions, like a sun with its rays of light. The halls were numbered, but had no labels beyond that. I’d discovered last night that halls 1-5 all led to training areas, 6 went to the dining hall, 7 to the ballroom (I’ll explain later), 8 to the base’s entrance and 9 to Anniversary’s office and dormitory. I remembered how back when I was still living here, everyone had been taught to rely on memory and deduction to get anywhere. Some of my brothers and sisters would “cheat” and write the locations down on their hands, or slips of paper. Some would draw entire maps of floors so it was all in one place. I think one person even carved something into their own skin so it wouldn’t be removed when a guard found it and tried scrubbing it off. Even though it was breaking a rule, I held a small sense of admiration in me for their persistence. I found myself thinking now,  _ Even if it’s still against the rules, Hodek could use some sort of guide for when I’m not around. _

“We’re going down hall 6,” I said without further explanation. It seemed he didn’t need any.

“So that’s the…cafeteria, or whatever you guys have. How do you know this already? Is this the exact same kind of system they used before you got…well, y’know.” He sounded a bit groggy; even if he hadn’t been sleeping, sitting on the side of a bed with your head down for hours will have its effects. I shook my head.

“Did some exploring yesterday. Oh, um…what was that thing you said, all those months ago? I’m going to try doing my version of that.” I cleared my throat as if to make a speech. “Lesson one: we don’t get our breaks just for resting. Use them wisely. As soon as I left your room before dinner time, I spent the rest of mine mapping out this place, figuring out which tunnel led to where.”

“Well, it certainly is a little boot camp you’ve got yourself here, isn’t it?” Hodek said, doing an uncanny impression of a chastising mother. I let out a single laugh. “Shut up.”

When we arrived at the end of the hall, we were met with a room far more empty than I had expected for this time of day. Only about twenty people in total were seated and eating, and some were even walking out.

_ Are we late? _

I shook my head.  _ No, no, that can’t be it. I was explicitly told that now was when they’d start serving food. Did they lie to me…? _

Somebody I didn’t recognize seemed to notice my confusion, and waved the two of us over with a sigh. They did it so subtly that for a moment I wondered whether they had actually meant to. I kept my grip on Hodek’s arm as we made our way over, and the person raised a finger to point up. At what, I could only guess.

“Now, I’m not sure what it was like before, but there isn’t just one hour per meal where everybody and their mother comes down here. There are shifts. And half the people that  _ would’ve  _ been here right now are on guard duty, anyway.” They fixed me with a cautious look. “You’re that new guy. Masquerade, right?”

“Oh, well, I wouldn’t say I’m new.”

“Right. Of course. It’s just that you’re a rare case, I guess. Now, him?” Their eyes shifted to Hodek, but their face didn’t read disgust or fear more than curiosity.  _ “That’s _ new.”

He narrowed his eyes as far as possible. “Thank you, I think.”

“Why don’t you two sit down? First shift’s about to start.”

Hodek shot me an uncertain glance, but took a seat with me anyway next to the recruit. Their gaze kept traveling back and forth between the two of us, like they were trying to figure out how on earth we ended up together, let alone back here.

“You’re that guy who went practically unhinged during the 9:15 training period yesterday,” they said as if just realizing it. “I’m Major. I was talking about it with my neighbors, we thought it was pretty cool. You really just went for it, huh?”

A few more people had sat down by then, eyes locked on the table, though I knew they were all listening. I felt the urge to throw them a warning glare, but reminded myself that there were no enemies here; only disagreements. Hodek made no such observation and kept talking.

“Sure, I kind of had to. This place, it doesn’t exactly look like the friendliest underground city in the world. I’m gonna tell you now: don’t even  _ think  _ about trying to use me for some kidnapping mission, or whatever. At least not until I’m under hypnosis.”

“I’m afraid I can’t promise you that, Hodek,” said Major, who obviously knew that would surprise both of us. They blinked and tilted their head, as if to say,  _ Yeah, I knew that. What are you going to do about it?  _ “After all, even with two injured legs—and a broken rib, I’m guessing, based on the way you were holding yourself—you did pretty well back there.”

Hodek certainly seemed caught off guard by that. Who wouldn’t be? After a while, he responded with his usual disinterested voice, but with a thin layer of discomfort underneath that I was sure only I had picked up on.

“And you’re definitely…observant,” he said, as if he was making a considerable effort to choose a less harsh word than something like  _ creepy  _ or  _ nosy _ . “I can see why they wanted you, you look like you’re built to fight.”

Major had lifted a cup of plain black coffee to their mouth, but decided to set it down before taking a sip. They arched an eyebrow, their entire face reconfiguring into one that said loud and clear,  _ I’m testing you. _

“‘Wanted’ me? Well, who’s  _ they,  _ first of all?”

Hodek didn’t read the signals to take what he’d said back, and leaned forward even more with his hands twitching, but still locked together. “You know.  _ They.  _ Whoever runs this place, that woman, Annie-something.”

_ “Anniversary,”  _ I whispered out of the side of my mouth. He sighed.

“Yeah, whatever. Anniversary. Point is, they found you, saw what you had, and plucked you off the ground to train here with the rest of them. Performed some standard indoctrination shit, and here we are.”

I closed my eyes and rested my head in my hands, seconds away from slapping tape or anything else I could find over his mouth.  _ Please, Hodek, do not make them kill you. _

Major, for whatever reason, seemed almost amused. There was a subtle yet horrible weight to their voice now that told me Hodek had went too far, but for the most part everything else was fine. I felt their fingers drumming on the table, rapid and like clockwork.

“Hm. Well, you’re new here. You don’t get it, I guess I can’t really blame you. But I’m not here right now because somebody  _ wanted  _ me. I belong with these people. And they belong with me. We all haven’t fit anywhere else so perfectly. We’re a family, right, Masquerade?”

“Oh, you can try and tell him that,” I groaned jokingly from behind my hands. “He’s not exactly what I’d call  _ trusting,  _ Hodek here.”

He gasped and flicked my mask between the eyes. “An insult!”

“Like you care!” I was about to laugh at this point. With that, the tension building up from this conversation seemed to melt away, and I was able to lift my head again while Jeff pinched a lock of his own hair to keep his hands busy.

“Okay, so maybe I’m stubborn. We’ll put it that way. He actually told me a lot about you guys, I just never thought we—”

“He  _ told  _ you?”

Somebody piped up from the other side, and I cursed them out in my head as the attention of the entire table was drawn to us. Hodek’s eyes anxiously scanned the various distressed and suspicious faces before him, and he cleared his throat.

“I-I mean, if he’s not supposed to do that, he didn’t. I…” after a few more seconds, he leaned toward me and muttered, “I’m making this worse, aren’t I.”

I closed my eyes and nodded, folding my hands on the table as I tried preparing some sort of explanation.

“Hodek and I…well, needless to say, we couldn’t risk being seen in public. If at all. Anything I may have told him was to help find you all, and it was heard by him only. Any others I’ve disclosed that information to are now dead.” I opened my eyes again and looked up, any small sense of hope petering out in my chest like a dying flame. “You can trust…us.” In reality, I felt that statement wasn’t as true as it could have been. Sure, I wasn’t going to betray my own family any time soon, and I was certain I’d be able to keep Hodek from strangling someone when push came to shove. But “us” sounded wrong, because when I said  _ trust,  _ I meant it in completely different ways for him and I.

_ Oh, well. They all can take that as they’d like. _

I looked around the room and saw that ready trays of food had been put out. I softly cleared my throat and pulled on the edge of one of Hodek’s sleeves. “Let’s get breakfast.”


	36. Chapter 36

I was able to bounce back from that fairly quickly after eating, and the rest of the day passed without much conflict for me. Hodek, on the other hand, started to look more off-put by the second, reminding me time and time again that we had very, _very_ different upbringings. I didn’t get the feeling that it was the constant talk of combat, strategy, and strict schedule that made him uncomfortable; it was more the idea that all this had been my childhood that seemed to disturb him. After our talk in his room the night before, he made a point to be more reserved with his opinion of this place, but he wasn’t the best at hiding it. I tried to stay optimistic and for the most part it worked. Besides, he would have to come around eventually, right?

It was hard to keep count of exactly how many days had passed since we first arrived, but I figured I had more important things to worry about. All I know is that we were more or less a week in when I pulled Anniversary aside by my room after training, and asked her about Event. Nothing I’d learned here could have prepared me for the way she shuddered when I said his name out loud.

“No,” she said.

“That…that’s all you’re giving me? _No?_ That doesn’t even make sense.”

“I said no, Masquie. Don’t you have somewhere to be?” She tried walking past me, but I stepped to the side and blocked her way.

“I’m on break, and this is what I planned to use it for. Did something happen? You can tell me, I’m not a kid anymore.”

“It’s not that, I just…I’m not going to subject you to something like this. Not on the first couple of days back. I know what’ll happen if I tell you, I know what you’ll do.”

“What, then? Just give me an answer. Did someone take him away…?”

“I sent him outside and we lost him! Now will you drop it?”

We were both frozen for a good moment. I lifted a finger to point, but didn’t know where to.

“You…lost him? What does that mean?”

“It _means_ we don’t know where he is and we have to assume that he…” she took a shudder of a breath and closed her eyes. “…that he’s dead. Is that what you wanted to hear?”

“How can you not know where he is, didn’t he have a tie with him?”

Anni folded her arms and averted her gaze, sighing with regret. “He was one of our very best, too. I think he actually started picking up some mannerisms from the Elder.”

“But what _happened_ to him? Where did he go, why did you send him out in the first place?”

She picked at a small patch of fabric on her uniform like she wanted more than anything to avoid answering me. “He…well, I sent him on a mission. Maybe it was two years ago? No, less. But we haven’t heard from him at all since his last audio transmission, we have no choice but to say he died. He was supposed to find the whereabouts of a girl named Altaris.”

I narrowed my eyes. _Altaris?_ I’d never heard such a name be used for any of us. It almost sounded Latin. “And he was sent to do it alone? That’s a little careless, even if he—”

“Masquie, I know I’ll never be the kind of mastermind our Elder was. But Event wasn’t alone, I made sure of that much. He’d been sent out with a team of about seven, and I gave each one of them the basics of the mission.”

“Which were…?”

“Find a young woman, I think around the age of 19 at the time, whose eyes can turn yellow. Wait until they go back to normal, because in that state she’s at her most dangerous. I handed Event a slip of paper to be used _only_ when they recover her, it had what I believed to be the Elder’s untrue name on it. Once Altaris read it, she would understand.”

“The Elder’s _untrue_ name…are you sure she would’ve wanted that?”

“Absolutely. I was actually thinking about sending another division out, but there just aren’t enough recruits to do it now. And considering what happened to Event…” she stared past me, unblinking, still hugging herself. “I’m not sure I could take that just yet.” She seemed to realize that she still hadn’t answered my question in full, and sighed. “Just come with me to the record room. I’ll try explaining all of this better.”

I glanced back toward the room where Hodek was staying and felt a pang of worry. “Can I bring _him_ with me? I don’t want to leave him alone for too long, especially not here.”

Anni’s mouth twisted in consideration. “If you must. But I’ve noticed, he does seem to have this little habit of speaking for you. Are you sure we can trust him with these things?”

“Well, he’s seen more of the world than I have. Besides, _I_ trusted him, and look where I just so happened to turn up.” I patted her on the shoulder and opened Hodek’s door to poke my head in.

“Hey. You’re not doing anything, are you?”

He sat up straight and reached for his knife, pausing when he realized it was just me. “…not really,” he said under his breath.

“Good. You’re coming with Anni and I to the record room. You won’t be bothered by any guards there, you won’t even have to do anything.”

“My two favorite activities. Uh, can I ask why exactly you’re taking me?”

I shrugged and opened the door all the way, waving him forward. “So you’re not penned up in here like a teenager who’s afraid of the sun. How often do you leave this room, anyway?”

“No comment.” He got up, stretched, and decided against leaving his newly prized weapon here, stuffing it into one of his pockets as he followed me outside.

* * *

 The walk to this supposed “record room” was a surprisingly long and confusing one. While Anni was adamant about knowing the way, it seemed that she got lost a couple of times herself. I looked around the halls as their light started to fade, and turning my gaze back ahead I saw a small white speck in the distance. It was a single lit lantern, hung next to a ladder. Anni sighed with relief when she caught sight of it, and began climbing up. I lifted my mask from my face with a finger before snapping it back on.

“Does anybody else know about this?”

“About what?”

“Any of it. Event disappearing, the mission, this _room?_ Didn’t you think to tell your immediates?”

Hodek had been rooted to his spot for a few minutes, even after I’d started up the ladder. “Immediates?” He muttered.

“You had a brother, right? It’s kind of like…everyone is more or less extended family here. Your immediates are the ones closest to you, sort of like a club. I guess that makes me one of yours,” I said without looking down. Hodek waited a moment, then followed me.

“If we’re not counting the brother part, then sure.”

When we finally arrived, I wasn’t even sure if we’d went the right way. For starters, the door to the record room didn’t even look like a door. It was more like an extra piece of wall somebody had nailed on as a placeholder. We were almost standing in pitch black, so I was dumbfounded when Anni took a small metal chip out of her pocket and stuck it in a slot I didn’t realize was there. She opened the door, and dust flew. The good news was that we could see clearly again.

“Don’t let all of this fool you,” Anniversary said through poorly disguised coughs. “This is the second time I’ve been here this week, and there’s still plenty of cobwebs stuck to the door.”

“By what, magic?” Hodek asked under his breath. I sighed and shook my head.

“So what were you going to show me here, Anni?”

She was currently untangling countless wires from each other, unperturbed by the snapping noises that occurred every now and then. “Before we lost track of him, Event would give us…well, he’d give _me_ consistent reports through the tie, telling me how far along the division was, where exactly they were, who was still there…”

“Wait, ‘who was still there?’ You mean, some of them—”

“Some of them came back home, Masquie. They didn’t _die_. Anyway, I still have his old recorded updates here. Everything in those seems to be going smoothly, until around the time that Major left.”

_Wait._ Major _…why do I get a strange feeling from them? And why would they abandon a mission this important? They seemed a lot sharper than some of the others._

Hodek tapped my shoulder and nodded towards a frail-looking wooden chair in the corner of the room. “I think I’m just going to chill there. Don’t really want to get caught up in whatever kind of family drama this is.”

“Okay. Some of this stuff might be a little sensitive, anyway.”

“Can’t be any more ‘sensitive’ than you,” he said, stretching his arms with a smirk as if preparing for a _nap to end all naps_. I rolled my eyes.

“Wow. Alright, you know what I mean. Just…whatever you hear doesn’t leave this room, got it?”

“Aye-aye, partner.”

_At least we still have that going._

“Masquerade.”

“Yeah,” I responded, turning to Anniversary with my hands behind my back. She held a pair of ancient, busted-up headphones in one hand and a tape in the other.

“You’re lucky I was feeling nice today, otherwise you’d be in training right about now.”

“I know.”

She took a quick glance to locate the tape player built into a panel on the wall, and stuck the tape inside. She rewound it until a tiny screen to her right read _17:10:26_.

“This is where things started getting a little weird. Here, you can…” as she hit _play_ and handed me the headphones, a loud screech of feedback came from them that lasted about five seconds before being completely cut off. Anni was frozen for a moment, then disconnected the poor things to examine the plug. It had been scratched mercilessly, rendering the headphones useless. She sighed.

“Fine. We’ll _all_ listen, I guess.”


	37. Chapter 37

_ “I’m going to stop numbering the logs now. It’s not even like you’re going to listen back on it, it’s more of a one-way mirror situation here.” _

Event’s voice was shaky, but he seemed to be holding himself together. Anni hadn’t bothered filling me in on anything that happened before this message, and I wasn’t about to ask. The recording’s quality had deteriorated, though I got the feeling that a year ago it had been clear and sharp. Event took a couple more steps, crunches some more leaves, let out an amused sigh and continued.

_ “It’s getting really cold out here, I think it’s ‘bout to snow. Getting harder to use the tie all the time, I might just take it off until something really happens. I’ve been passing through this town and I keep hearing a weird buzzing in my ear. I-I’m pretty sure it’s nothing, though.” _

The wind kicked itself up in volume just as he finished talking as if to prove his point that it was, indeed, getting cold. Event cleared his throat to mask a cough.

_ “It’s nighttime right now, I…”  _ a disturbance in the audio told me he was adjusting his tie.  _ “I’ve learned  _ not  _ to put myself in plain sight around here, no matter how innocent I think I look. I keep getting these shifty looks from…it’s kind of funny, actually, they all seem like angry parents. Not sure why they’re focusing on  _ me,  _ but either way, I’m only going out at night.” _

There was a moment of pure silence, then Event started talking again.

_ “Okay, so I have something of an answer to the whole  _ people keep looking at me weirdly  _ thing.” _

“It’s a new day,” Anni muttered into her palms. I wondered if she was even talking to me.

_ “I’ve heard some rumors. Something that happened, just a couple of days ago. I don’t know if any of what they said is true, but apparently some stupid kid decided to break into a church at night with a gang and…the whole building just ended up collapsing on them. Most of ‘em made it out okay, save for a poor old lady that was with them for some reason. Irving, I think her name was. A shame, wasting a life like that. But she’s not who I’m looking for.” _

The sound of stones scraping together echoed in the background, and if I had to guess, I would have said that he was trying to climb over an unstable stone wall. He landed on firm ground, dusted himself off, and kept walking.

_ “So maybe these people think I’m gonna do something like that. I mean, I wouldn’t really put it past myself, either.”  _ He forced a laugh, and the counter next to Anni ticked up another day.

_ “Hey, Anni old pal, it’s been a while. New town. Well, I mean, I’ve been through a lot of new towns. I must be halfway across the state at this point, I…” _

Silence. Horrible, dreadful silence.

_ “Hey, do you see—wait, no, of course you don’t.” _ Event let out an aggravated sigh.  _ “Listen, there’s a…” _ something snapped, but he didn’t seem to take notice.  _ “…weird house, at the end of the street here. Looks vacated. It, uh, has this spray-painting on the side, I think it’s supposed to be a moon?” _

He hesitated.

_ “I’m going in. Who knows, nothing might even happen.” _

He definitely took his time with this one. Wood creaked under his weight, it seemed he was dragging his hand along the walls, and even his breathing slowed down a bit. At first I thought my brain was playing tricks on me when I heard a series of back-to-back clicks, but then Event started muttering to himself,  _ “Well, these don’t work.” _ He cleared his throat.

_ “I don’t know what to tell you, Anni. There’s literally  _ nothing  _ here. Not even, like, a stool or a paint bucket. Nothing. This house was just…left behind, I guess—” _

He was cut off by another voice. It was so quiet I wouldn’t have been sure that it was real, had he not heard it too. It sounded like it’d just said,  _ “Shit.” _

Then there was static, and the audio returned to normal. Event flipped what I assumed to be a light switch about ten times before gulping.

_ “Okay. Okay, alright, I’m getting too jumpy. Uh, so, here’s the thing.”  _ He laughed nervously.  _ “You’re probably not gonna believe this, but the lights just turned on. By themselves. I shit you not, every single light this place has just turned itself on, all at once. I-I mean, I flipped this switch a couple of times, but it didn’t do anything and then all of a sudden…” _

He paused, then his tie shifted, causing another disturbance in the audio. After a good moment he sighed, starting up some stairs.

_ “There’d better be something good up here,”  _ he whispered to himself. With no indication as to why, his steps came to an abrupt halt, which didn’t give me too good of a feeling about this.

_ “What…what are…?” _

He didn’t finish his sentence, and after about a minute, I heard that other voice. It was garbled, loud, almost pained. It could have sounded like a teenager, maybe a young adult if not for all the distortion.

**_“What are you doing here.”_ **

Event’s throat contracted, and his voice shook the slightest bit.  _ “I’m…I’m looking for someone. Someone really important, maybe you know her? Young woman, Altaris—” _

Her last name was blocked out by a loud screech in the audio. He really didn’t want anything to be traced back to this  _ Altaris, _ apparently.

_ “I’ll leave you alone if you don’t know anything, but—” _

**_“No._ ** _ I-I mean, I can help. What’s your name?” _

And suddenly, the thing’s voice was…normal. I heard Hodek shift in his seat and turned to see that he’d lifted his head just slightly, like he recognized something but realized he might draw attention to himself. He looked to me, then to Anni with a hint of nervousness, and continued at whatever he’d been doing.

_ “I don’t think I can tell you. Am I interrupting something? It looks like you…”  _ he trailed off like he’d been threatened in some way, and I heard a couple of shallow breaths before he started talking again.  _ “Okay. Sorry. I just wanted to know.” _

_ “Why would you expect me to tell you if you won’t even…whatever. Anything’s better than this. So, your  _ Altaris  _ person. You sure she doesn’t go by anything else?” _

_ “Something close. But I don’t know what it is.” _

_ “You’re lying.” _

_ “What? N-no. I really don’t know, if I did then I would’ve found her by now.” _

_ “I can see who you work for, Evan Hurley. If she was raised at your base, with no other given name, she would have stayed there. They must have given you  _ something _ to work with. Wouldn’t they want to make this job easier for you—?” _

_ “How did you know that.” _

Event sounded afraid. Very afraid, like something more disturbing than what I heard was happening before him. Whoever was talking to him seemed to be reaching their limit.

**_“It doesn’t—”_ ** they cut themselves off.  _ “I mean, it doesn’t matter what I know or how I know it. Just tell me what you need and get out.” _

_ “I-I don’t know, directions? Home address, phone number? I just need something. You…”  _ Event sighed.  _ “You’re right. This mission hasn’t gone well at all. I lost all of my division members. Whoever  _ they  _ are, they didn’t even give me Altaris’s birth name. I…” _ he seemed to think, and a loud  _ clunk _ muffled the audio for about a minute. I could make out a few words, spoken by both of them.

_ “Anniversary.” _

_ “Unfit.” _

_ “Gone.” _

_ “Useless.” _

_ “Need.” _

_ “Run away.” _

_ “Home.” _

Then a string of numbers that were made incomprehensible through what could have only been Event’s hand.

For a moment, everything was completely silent. When Event uncovered the microphone with a shudder of a sigh, the person talking to him made no comment. Simply said,  _ “You know, I’m not helping you further than that. You want a phone, you’re going to have to get one by yourself. Go rob someone, shoplift, I really don’t care.” _

_ “I didn’t get the feeling that you did. Thank you, anyway.” _

_ “Uh…you’re welcome. Now  _ **_leave.”_ **

_ “Okay. Okay. Bye,”  _ he muttered, in something of a panic. I heard the creaking of floorboards as he made his way down the stairs, with much more haste than before.

_ “Hi again, Anni. Um. Don’t worry, I wasn’t talking about you,”  _ he said with a forced laugh, his words occasionally punctuated by hurried footsteps.  _ “It looks like we’re finally back on track. Or…well,  _ I’m  _ back on track. Let me know if the others got back safe, would you?” _

I wasn’t entirely sure why I didn’t hear Anniversary’s responses in the audio. Maybe the messages were only transmitted one way. Maybe she just didn’t know how to answer him. It struck me then that there were brothers and sisters here who went on that mission with him, and they had to live unsure of whether he was alive or not. The thought made me uneasy; I didn’t know if  _ I _ could do with that kind of ambiguity. I looked to Anniversary, whose eyes were glazed over like she purposefully clocked out in order to spare herself the pain.

The recording’s counter automatically skipped a couple of days, as if somebody had listened to it so many times that this machine already knew where to go. The audio resumed with the sound of a branch falling to the forest floor.

_ “…” _

I couldn’t hear Event’s breathing anymore. After about a minute of complete silence, there was a shuffling noise as he seemed to pull something out of his pocket. A small click, and he continued walking.

_ “Almost there, Altaris,”  _ he breathed. His voice sounded like it had given out a while ago, though from what exactly I couldn’t be sure.  _ “It’s okay. We’re all gonna be fine.” _ Even though he was clearly talking to himself, it felt as if he knew that Altaris could hear him. As if she knew he was coming.

Twigs snapped loudly underneath his feet and many times he stopped, took a shaky breath and continued, walking faster each time. Leaves rustled as he pushed his way through the woods, and for some reason I felt as if I was blindfolded in the passenger’s seat of a car. A small wave of nausea hit me, causing me to lean back just for some distance from the audio. I knew  _ something  _ was going to happen, but Event didn’t stop moving. I almost wanted to get it over with.  _ Whatever horrible thing you’re going to do to him, world, please do it soon. _

Finally, he slowed his pace and coughed once. He froze, seemingly in realization.

_ “…ah. It’s still on…Anni, if you’re even listening to me anymore, I think you might wanna send backup. I’m not sure exactly where I am, but I’ll find out soon. I’ve heard things, things about what lives here.  _ Who,  _ actually. Who lives here. And…” _

He inhaled sharply, like some old wound had reopened.

_ “Um. Okay, fine, I’ll admit it. I’m kind of scared. But at least I know  _ something  _ about them. It’s not too much, but it might be enough. I’ll be out of this place before you know it. Just…tell Major and the others I’m okay, will you? If you haven’t already.”  _ He took a deep breath.  _ “Alright. I’m going in.” _

He started walking on old, weathered wood. I could almost hear dust fly in the night air—or maybe he was risking being seen in daylight this time.

A door creaked open.

_ “Hello…?” _

He waited a couple of seconds.

Then a new voice muttered something, much too close to the microphone.

_ “Hello.” _

Then the audio cut out with painfully loud feedback and a  _ crunch _ to end it. It was as if someone had dropped the bow tie and crushed it under their foot.

The timer had stopped.


	38. Chapter 38

I couldn’t help feeling sick to my stomach at everything I’d just heard; to think that after all that, Event might have just…died. That somebody had mutilated his entire body for no reason I could see. Trespassing, maybe? I was still disgusted. And now I had a solid guess as to exactly who I’d seen dead in Clockwork’s cabin.

“That was him.”

Anni fixed me with an odd look, her eyes now misty. “It certainly was. Do you have anything else to add…?”

“No, I mean that was _him._ Event, he was the person I saw dead in that cabin. If I’d been there just a couple months earlier, I could’ve stopped it.” I felt something get stuck in my throat, but before I could say much else Hodek piped up from behind me.

“You saw someone _dead_ there? Why didn’t you tell me?”

For some reason, my fingers grazed the X-shaped scar he had given me long ago. An involuntary shiver passed through my body.

“I didn’t want to worry you.”

Anniversary sighed, though I could tell she was more than a little upset at finding out Event really was dead. “Masquerade, here’s some advice. Don’t think about the ‘if’s for much longer than a minute. It hurts you too much, and it hurts others. What matters is that you’re here, and that we can count on you _now_.”

I managed to steal a glance at Hodek, who was far enough that Anni and I could whisper without anything significant being heard. I lowered my voice as a persistent question came to mind. I was hoping for a change in subject, anyway.

“So why _is_ this Altaris person so important? I thought being one of us would be enough.”

Anni noticed this, and responded accordingly. “Oh, she’s plenty more than enough. She’s got the Fallax’s eye. She can bend another’s will to hers, even while telling blatant lies!”

_And she does this by turning her eyes…yellow?_ “That doesn’t sound right. I want new recruits as much as the next person, I do. But if showing them what it means to be with us doesn’t convince them to stay, then shouldn’t we just let them go? Let them learn for themselves.”

Anni looked at me for a while and then sighed. “I used to think like you, Masquie. I had a lot more faith in the world. But the problem is that we can’t afford to let these people go anymore. It causes too much trouble. Remember how _you_ reacted when we first took you in?”

I did. I never wanted to, but I couldn’t make those memories go away. I was so scared of everyone, and I kept searching for a way back to my old family. Everybody was being so nice, and yet, I felt that something was wrong about all of it. Of course, over the next couple of years I learned better.

“…yes.”

“And that’s what we can’t have happening here. You absolutely _refused_ to put your bow tie on. You were scared of all the buttons, I think. It was almost funny, but I felt so horrible for it all. It just had to be done.”

“I…I understand. So Altaris will help us?”

“I think so. Our Elder thought so. At this point, I’m just doing what I think she would. It’s worked so far.” Anni’s eyes darted around the room at various objects, and her hope seemed to grow. “With Altaris by our side, we’ll be more powerful than ever. We’ll be able to save more people. Maybe even the Elder, someday.”

Beads of sweat started collecting at my temples and the bridge of my nose. Something still felt wrong about what she was saying, I just couldn’t place what. I nodded anyway.

“Okay.”

She gave me a curious look. “And speaking of saving…your ‘friend’ seems more familiar to me the more I look at him. It’s like I’ve seen some other version of him somewhere.”

My head snapped to where Jeff was sitting and eyeing me like he was all too anxious to leave this place.

“Uh. Yeah. I guess he just has one of those faces.”

“Right. But you know, if he ever considered _really_ joining us…I-I mean, you guys seem so close, I’d hate to tear you apart. Plus, with the Elder away, we can’t really be counted on to maintain order. A little exception might even do us some good.”

I’d never even considered it. Hodek just _joining_ the family, with no past record and no predetermined name? It felt so strange. But…

“Maybe he could. He trusts me, I’d like to think. Are you sure, though?”

Anni looked at me with a kind of sadness I couldn’t understand. “I think the real question here would be, are _you?”_

* * *

I waited to tell him. I _wanted_ to, of course. Almost more than anything right now. But I knew he wouldn’t like being given that option, for whatever reason. So I kept my mouth shut about the matter for days. Anytime he would jokingly ask, “Where’s _my_ new name?” I’d elbow him in the gut. Not even the dance could loosen my tongue until the very end.

Oh, yeah. We had dances. We kept things very traditional; had specialized uniforms for missions, lounging back home, naming, etc. But the dances were when we could kind of dress up however we wanted. When the Elder was still around, a lot of people would get _really_ extravagant. We could afford to. But right now, we had maybe a little more than thirty people available for the entire thing. I could feel how forced everyone’s excitement was. They must have had to do this a lot ever since they’d gotten back together. It wasn’t that I didn’t understand, because I did. I just missed all of this, and so wasn’t bothered by its smaller scale. When I told Jeff about the whole thing, it was almost like he didn’t believe me but was too nervous to ask anyone else about it. He didn’t want to take my word for it, yet also didn’t seem like he wanted to go in the slightest. After prodding and asking him multiple times, he sighed and lightly smacked the back of my head.

“Fine. It’s not like you’re giving me a choice.”

“Hey, you only have to stay ten minutes. If you _really_ don’t like it, you can leave. Deal?”

“…deal.”

I smiled and began walking out of the room to change, when he stopped me.

“You’ve been a lot happier than usual lately.”

_Oh, no._

I paused. “Yeah. Is there something wrong…?”

“No, no, it’s not…I mean, I just think it looks nice on you.” He said it even more quietly than he normally talked. My face grew warm underneath my mask, and I shook my head to hide it.

“Well, obviously. It’s _joy_. It looks nice on everyone.”

His eyes widened at that before he processed what I was actually talking about. He laughed. “Oh. Uh, yeah. That.”

I raised an eyebrow, though he couldn’t see it. “Good talk. I’m gonna go now.”

“Bye,” he muttered, toying with the strings of his sweater. Not even in his usual _I’m bored because I’m not stabbing somebody to death_ way; it just seemed like he didn’t know what else to do as I left.

* * *

 Naturally, Anni wouldn’t have let me go outside for something as trivial as buying clothes. It was still a wonder to me that we hadn’t resorted to straight-up theft yet, though something about the look in her eye when she assured me that _of course we obtained all our uniforms legally_ gave me the feeling she hadn’t been entirely truthful. I shrugged it off anyway—after all, I was pretty far from innocent in that category—and let her send off somebody else to find Hodek something suitable to wear. At least, if he didn’t end up changing his mind at the last second.

With him being an honorary guest of some sorts and not actually part of the family, whoever had done the job clearly settled for the bare minimum; all they returned with was a dress shirt, tuxedo vest, and regular black pants akin to _jeans_. I nearly shuddered at the thought. Nevertheless, the clothes were dropped off at his room, where he didn’t give the deliverer much more than a nod and muttered “thanks.” As per usual. I thought to myself that at the very least, he’d appreciate something new to wear, even if he hated everything else.

Exactly an hour prior, I made sure everything was perfect and in place. I had to remind myself to take this evening easy; I’d worked myself up too much in the past however many months, trying to find the people who loved me. Who would accept me, no matter what. And now I was here. Not much could go wrong tonight, I told myself. I took a glance at the pliers on my shelf, and with hesitance walked out of my room without them. Adjusting my jacket, I started heading for the rays when I heard someone calling from a room down the hall.

“Wait…!”

I stopped and turned around to see Anni frantically searching herself, everything she was dressed in not completely fastened yet. I laughed, to which she threw me her deadliest of glares.

“Hey. Don’t forget, I’m _never_ the type to go to these kinds of things. I just wanted to give you this.”

She held out a clean, brand-new looking bow tie, with tiny buttons on its back that were even less noticeable than before. I raised an eyebrow.

“One of the tracker ties? What, you want me to drop everything and go on a mission right after this?”

“Masquie, I know a lot of things have changed, and I know it might take a little getting used to being here again. But we might not see each other as often. I’ve been running the family for years now ever since the Elder’s gone missing, and I need to know that I can trust you to protect yourself.”

“You mean, alert you if something goes wrong.”

After a moment, she sighed. “No, I…I keep forgetting. She never told you, did she?”

“Tell me what,” I said, feeling it was more of a demand than a question. Anni’s gaze dropped to the floor.

“These ties are more than just trackers. They have a few extra features, in case of anything unexpected. One of them is a combative enhancement. It was based on a condition that the Elder had. If you’re attacked by anyone without preparation, then…”

I didn’t like her hesitation. “What?”

“Then it takes over and you kill them. Immediately. It doesn’t matter how much energy you have, or how strong you are, the tie does all the work. And now you know.” She looked back up at me. “I just want you to be safe. Promise me you’ll wear it?”

My eyes flickered back and forth from the tie to her. I raised a hand to take it, but then stopped myself.

_No. This is a peaceful event. We’re trying to have fun. Besides, why didn’t I know about this before?_

“I can’t, Anni. I’m sorry.”

“I’m not going to tell you that I don’t like this new confidence, but you should really—”

“It’s not that. I can’t wear this, knowing I could end even more innocent lives. Do you know how much I’ve taken just to be here?”

She didn’t seem to know what to say to that for a moment. Finally, after a minute of silence, she spoke softly.

“I know what you mean, Masquerade. I killed my own father. Right after being sent home by the police, before he could even ask me what happened. I didn’t want to, but I had to. And in the end, it was worth it.” She hesitated. “You would rather die than just have another tool on your belt?”

“I would rather not wear it now, at the very least. This is a dance, Anni. I’m about to show my—” I bit my tongue. “…my _friend_ what it’s like to really live with us.” I gently pushed down her hand, and a hurt expression crossed her face, followed by defeat. I felt a strange pain in my chest and forced myself to look her in the eye.

“I’ll think about it. Later. Okay?”

She closed her eyes and nodded. “Okay. It’s just that…I can’t be there for the whole dance. Too much work. I’m not going to be there to remind you, so you’ll have to remember.”

“Hey. I remembered my family for five years.”


	39. Chapter 39

[JEFF]

It was already apparent to me—or really, anyone who knew him—that Max is definitely one for dapper attire. I don’t care if that’s what everyone in his little “family” dresses like, he wouldn’t be caught dead without that dress shirt and slacks. Not real practical, considering he’d been running from the law for the last five years, but I wasn’t about to bring it up.

Anyways, I had a vague image in my mind of what he might have looked like when I saw him again that night. Neither of us had actually seen each other in different clothes since we’d met, so it was going to be a little weird. But all comprehensible thought left me when I stepped out (after struggling to get my own shit together) and saw his outfit. This wasn’t in the sense that it was over-the-top in any way, because it wasn’t. Not at all. It was just a change, and as small as it was, I couldn’t bring myself to look away for too long. He had changed his white button-up shirt for a black one, put on a white tie, and somehow found a sky blue over jacket that matched his mask perfectly. I was tempted to throw some kind of indifferent comment his way, but kept stopping myself. It just suited him too much (pun absolutely intended). So I shut my mouth, save for, “You look good,” and tried to hide any color in my face as we made our way towards the ballroom.

After a long, awkward silence, he leaned towards me and said, “You look good, too.” I didn’t know how to answer that. Fortunately, I didn’t get much of a chance to, because he dragged me to the dance floor before anything else could be said. We were almost sandwiched by two other couples, making it so that we had to stand even closer to each other to get some breathing room. My brain seemed to split in half, swaying from a weird sense of euphoria to gut-wrenching terror.

“Uh. You sure about this? I mean, what if they have someone walk around and shove balloons in between people who get too close. You know, like,  _ leave room for Jesus. _ ” I half-laughed, remembering all those dumb school dances I’d gone to and all the girls I’d convinced myself that I “liked.” Max, being Max, didn’t get it.

“Who does that? No, I think we’ve kind of broken the rules already. It would be weird if anybody tried to stop this now.”

“…I guess. But if they did, I’m pretty sure I could take down most of the people here,” I said, legitimately joking this time. Though the way he reacted, you would think I’d just penned my own death sentence.

“Please, for the love of god, do  _ not  _ try to do that.”

I looked at him funnily. “Hey, relax. That was a joke. I thought this was supposed to be fun?”

Hesitantly, he nodded and gazed off to the side. “Yeah. Yeah, it is. I—”

Suddenly, I heard a loud screech come from somewhere above us, and before I could cover my ears a soft song started playing. It was some modern-ish piece, with a slight touch of classical arrangement that only real music nerds would probably recognize. By just the first few seconds, I gathered for myself that it was alright for a more traditional dance like this. But Max seemed to know from the first note that it wasn’t his favorite.

“Ugh. ‘The Marionettes’? Way to give a first impression, Anni,” he said under his breath. “They really should have chosen something better.”

I raised an eyebrow. “It sounds…just like a regular waltz. If not a bit creepier. What, do you listen to this stuff in your free time?”

“And you don’t? It’s fine, actually. At least I  _ know  _ this one, I won’t look like an idiot. Not sure if I can say the same for you, though,” He added with a cocky sideways glance. I almost laughed.

“Man, being here really has done something to you. Is it the separate rooms? Your sister? Did they put something in your food while you weren’t paying attention?”

Max either didn’t understand what I meant by that or he didn’t care, because he just shook his head and in perfect sync with the music had me in a low, dramatic dip. I noticed all the other couples around us had done the same thing. The song hadn’t raised in volume the slightest bit, suggesting that every single dance this “family” endured here had calculated, premeditated moves that everybody had to learn beforehand. The thought only made me more nervous about this place. Our faces were just inches apart, and I realized for the first time that I really didn’t know what I was doing. I knew he was smug about all this but he didn’t show it as much as I thought he would. He just lifted me closer and muttered, “It’s because you’re in  _ my  _ world now. Doesn’t feel so great, does it? Not knowing what to do?”

I held onto him for dear life until we were brought back up to stand again. I let out a deep breath, my heart pounding over 100 miles an hour. Somewhere inside I knew it wasn’t exactly fair, but I wanted to reach his level on this, too. I shifted close and looked him in the eyes. “Alright, Max. Then guide me.”

Surprisingly, he didn’t seem fazed by that in the slightest. He stepped to the side in typical  _ one, two, three _ time.

“Will do.”

And signaled me with his eyes to follow suit.

[MASQ]

Seeing Hodek with that kind of fear in his features definitely set something off in my head. I wasn’t sure exactly what, but since our lives weren’t in danger at the moment I gave myself permission to find it a little funny.  _ Jeff the Killer, born: ??? Fears: being dipped in the middle of a waltz. Imagine! _

We carried on with the dance, me leading (of course) and him starting to catch on now that everything was more settled. Every misstep that occurred made me feel more and more like we were being judged by some outside source. Nobody  _ here  _ seemed to notice, though a couple of times we’d bump into somebody and they’d hiss something along the lines of, “watch it!” Over the course of about fifteen minutes, I observed the following things:

1 - Garde (who wasn’t even supposed to be here) sneaking a champagne glass off a table, filling it with water, and placing a tiny green capsule inside to watch it dissolve.

2 - Major talking either to themselves or into their tie’s microphone, even though Anniversary was still in the room.

3 - Candy and her partner shooting me several looks of disapproval from across the floor, then heading for the tiny snack bar to stab a pocket knife through two bread rolls at the same time.

_ So not much different than before I left. _

The worries I’d carried with me into this room started to disappear by the second, only to be replaced by new ones cramming their way into my head. Anni had given me a fairly good reason for why she wanted me to take a bow tie before the dance. But what if there was something more to it? What if she was planning some sort of drill in the middle of a song, and we had to be ready at all times? What would happen if I didn’t have a tie on? Would Hodek be able to handle something on the spot like that?

I closed my eyes and shook my head, hoping nobody had noticed.  _ Who am I kidding. Of course he could handle it. Why do I keep doubting him? Is it because I know he might favor saving himself over— _

“Max.”

I came back to earth. “What?”

Hodek looked at me suspiciously. “Are you okay? This is, like, the dozenth time you’ve zoned out in a minute.” After a moment, his face went stony with annoyance. “Are you even enjoying yourself? Because if it’s not at least one of us, I don’t see why I should stay here.”

_ I have to make a choice. _

“No, no, I’m okay. I’m just…I was thinking a lot, and this probably isn’t the best place to do it anyway, and…”

“Thinking about what?”

_ No, I’m not the one who has to make it. He’s only still here because of  _ me _. Would that really be a good enough reason? _

“Oh, you know. Stuff.”

“As if that’s what  _ you’d _ normally say. Come on, what is it?” He paused, and misstepped again. I winced on his behalf, since he couldn’t have cared less.

“Is it something about me?” He sounded genuinely confused now. Rather than focusing entirely on the question, my mind was asking,  _ So you didn’t mess up on purpose this time? _

“…you could say that, yes,” I said, narrowing my eyes and tilting my head. I hadn’t thought about what kind of message that would send, but when your head is so foggy with  _ what if’s  _ and proper dance technique, it’s hard to pay attention to those types of things as well. Hodek looked sheepish, which put me in a whole other state of worry.

“Hm. Uh, okay. I guess now would be a good time to let you know, I’m actually no good with this kind of shit,” he said.

_ What? _

“So I’m not doing it unless you’re 100% on board.”

_ Are you saying you want to stay? Why wouldn’t I be on board with that? _

Before I could put any of my thoughts into words, he started leaning closer and closer with a kind of tired wonder in his eyes. After a moment I finally realized what he was hoping I’d do, and something in me shifted; I wasn’t sure if I could follow through with that in a room full of people. In front of my family. Hell, in front of  _ Anni  _ if she was she still in here.

Just before god-knows-what was about to happen, I closed my eyes and said, “You could stay here.”

He paused. “…what?”

“If you really wanted to, you could stay with us. With  _ me _ . Isn’t…isn’t that what you were thinking?” I faltered when I caught sight of the look on his face.  _ I definitely said something wrong. _

“You know what I mean, right? We both know it can’t be as simple as before, I just wanted to make things easi—”

“Are you serious?” Hodek half-laughed, half-sighed and loosened his grip on my hand. My heart sank as everything I’d feared started to unfold in front of my face.

“Max, I’m sorry. But I just can’t see myself becoming one of these people.” He looked wistfully around at the various couples in the room. “Besides, they seem kind of tight-knit. It’d be weird for me to squeeze in, don’t you think?”

“I-I know, and it all takes a little getting used to. It’s just that…I’d give anything to be with my family. Hell, I’ve given everything already. It’s been years, Hodek. I’d choose them, even if it meant never seeing the sun again. Even if it meant never seeing—”

“Me?”

Everything I was about to say came to a halt and stuck in my throat. Hodek’s gaze snapped back to me, and slowly, he seemed to realize something. What that  _ something  _ would be, I had no idea. But it looked like it upset him. He narrowed his eyes as best he could, let go of me and stepped back.

“…I think I’m going to take a break.”

“What are you talking about? This is a dance, we’ve barely moved.”

“I’m going to take a  _ break, _ okay?” He gritted his teeth and walked out of the room. I was afraid he would push someone out of his way and disturb everyone else, but whoever he got near backed up and cleared a path for him. It seemed they all recognized that he was an outsider; then again, why wouldn’t they?


	40. Chapter 40

I couldn’t take standing, dejected, in the middle of a ballroom with relative strangers. The vast majority of these people must have been new. That, or I just didn’t recognize them after so long. But I suddenly felt lost, and saw no other option than to go after Hodek and talk to him about whatever the hell just happened.

As I made my way to the exit, I was blocked by an arm popping out from behind the doorway. I stepped back in surprise, at a loss for action until a familiar voice said, “Now  _ what  _ do you think you’re doing, honey.”

It was hard to fight back a smile.  _ Laurel. _

“You decided to bail too?” I asked, adjusting my mask and trying to hide any nervousness. Laurel stepped out and folded her arms like she was ready for an interrogation, though I could tell she was happy to see me.

“Well, I wasn’t just going to let you leave without saying hi. This dance has been a bust, anyway, some new guy stormed out a couple seconds ago.”

At that, I looked to the side and grabbed Laurel’s hand, leading her a couple feet out the door.

“That was Hodek,” I said reluctantly. “He’s…I mean, we’ve lived together for a while now and we just happened to find all of you. He can be rough sometimes, but he’s nice to me and that’s why I wanted him to stay here. At least for a little bit. And then I told him, and now I think he’s mad at me for something and—”

“Woah, woah! Slow down, little brother, I can barely keep up with all that. As usual. You talk really fast, you know that?”

“I—sorry, I’m just kind of panicking now. What if he went outside? Did you see exactly where he was headed? N-not that he’s dangerous or anything, but I don’t want him getting mixed up in something he shouldn’t be.”

_ “Dangerous? _ Wait, is…I should have guessed. Hodek, as in Jeff Hodek?”

Without thinking, I said, “That’s the one.”

Laurel’s eyebrows knit, and she even looked hesitant to respond for a second.

“I’ll help you, Masquerade. As much as you need.”

“Thank you,” I breathed, following her to another empty hallway where she pulled out a small sheet of paper and a likely dried-out pen. Laurel had never been a writer (at least, not that I knew of), but tapping the pen to her chin helped her think. She muttered to herself a while, eyes shifting back and forth down the hall, and finally landing on me when she’d gathered her thoughts.

“Based on where he turned, I’d have to assume he found one of the doors by now.”

I tilted my head. “What do you mean,  _ found? _ There are doors everywhere.”

“Not what I’m talking about. I meant one of the exits. They’re positioned like the door to the record room, I trust you’ve been there recently?”

“Wh—how did you know that?”

While she didn’t show a trace of a smile, her eyes gleamed at the question. “Dear old Anni made me her personal advisor. Well, not really. She just tells me things and I write them down sometimes, I remind her of the day’s schedule…”

“I think you mean you’re her secretary.”

“Oh. Well, that doesn’t sound nearly as fun. Anyways, Jeff probably went that way,” she continued, pointing towards a corner where two hallways intersected without looking, “and climbed out. If he was  _ really  _ angry, he might not be waiting patiently outside with an apology ready.”

“I can handle Hodek being mad at me,” I said with more confidence than I had. “I just hope he hasn’t gotten himself hurt already. You’re sure he’s out there?”

“Positive. And, Masquerade?”

Laurel and I weren’t exactly on nickname terms, but I could still tell she was shifting gears into her serious mode by the way she spoke. The moment I faced her, she put her hands on my shoulders and narrowed her eyes.

“I know you like him, but we all have to make sacrifices. No matter what happens…you’ll stay with us, right?”

My stomach tied itself into a knot, and I had a strange feeling that someone else was listening in on our conversation. I sighed.

“Of course.”

As I turned to leave, she made to grab my arm but then stopped herself.  _ I guess Anni isn’t the only one who’s getting protective. _

“Are you  _ sure _ he’s stable? Should we send someone—”

“No. I…I’ll just get him myself. He probably has a lot on his mind, talking to any one of you might make things worse. No offense,” I added, fiddling with the cuffs on my jacket. She shook her head.

“None taken. You have a bow tie, right?”

“It’s in my pocket. See you.”

I walked away quicker than I really needed to. I’d lied about the tie, but knowing how Anni was sometimes she might have slipped one into my suit anyway. I considered leaving the jacket here, though one draft from outside was enough to tell me that I needed to keep it on. I’d never noticed the changing of the seasons before now, it had always been so gradual when Hodek and I were on the run. But staying inside for days sped up the process more than I’d expected.

This way out was peculiar. At the former base, we never had any exits or entrances that indicated we lived underground. I had to climb up and out, like with the old trapdoor. It gave me a horrible feeling, though I couldn’t put my finger on why. The cold air seeped through my mask and onto my face, sending a shiver through me as I pressed on. I suddenly felt weak.  _ I’ve been hiding from the cold for so long that I can’t stand a few seconds outside? _

The vault-like door shut loudly behind me, making me curse in my head. I’d emerged in some sort of parking lot; a real one this time. It was empty, thankfully, save for the few vans clumped together in one corner. For a moment, I thought I was going crazy, because I saw a faint layer of mist swirling on the asphalt. It felt like a strange, low-budget horror movie. I would have found it funny if I wasn’t worried sick.

“Hodek,” I hissed into the air. There was a very low chance he’d be able to hear me if he was even here. I bit the inside of my cheek, scanning my surroundings as carefully as I could. It seemed there was even another forest nearby, too. If he’d retreated there…

_ I’m not going to chance that. _

“Looking for me, are you?”

I whirled around at the sudden voice that came from behind me. I knew it was Jeff, but he was speaking so quietly I was barely able to recognize him at first. Surprisingly, he still had his ballroom clothes on. He was almost dragging himself towards me, though I couldn’t see any harm done. He just seemed tired. I sighed.

“Oh, thank god. Please, come back inside. I…we were all worried, and I wanted to talk to you about—”

“You don’t need to do that.”

A bell rung in my head, and I raised an eyebrow. “Why not? What am I doing, exactly?”

“You don’t need to pretend like you care about me anymore. You’ve found what you were looking for all along. I get it. I can’t convince you to leave, and I won’t try. But here’s the thing…”

He drew a glimmering knife out of his pocket, longer and sharper than I was used to seeing at this point.

“I’m not leaving until I know that you can survive without me. Against people  _ like  _ me.”

“Hodek, what do you think you’re doing. What are you even talking about?”

“Do you ever wonder why I didn’t just finish that Clockwork girl off when I had the chance? Never really had a good reason to. She’s always been a bitch, no doubt. But I never trusted her. I never liked her. So  _ she  _ never got the chance to break me down.”

“Please. Just come back inside. I’m sure whatever you’re thinking—”

“But you’re different. You got under my skin. So it’ll make doing this a whole lot easier for me,” he growled, and charged at me with unbridled rage. I was just able to dodge him in time, adrenaline taking control of my body, and reached for my pliers.

Except they weren’t there.

_ This isn’t good. _

“Hodek, I’m not going to abandon you, if that’s what you’re saying. Why are you doing this?”

“Didn’t I just…tell you?!” He turned back around and started running again, this time grabbing my shoulder and ramming me into the ground, holding the knife to my throat.

“I don’t know why I didn’t see this coming. You always refused to come to your senses, and now that you’re with these people, it’s only gotten worse. Well,  _ I don’t care anymore. _ They can—”

“Stop talking!” I managed to free an arm and punched him in the jaw. It distracted him for long enough as I escaped his hold and practically threw off my over jacket, readying myself for whatever he had planned next. He continued nonetheless, rubbing the side of his mouth.

“They can twist your mind as much as they want. As long as you can make it in this world, fine by me.”

“You don’t know what you’re saying.”

“Oh, yes I do. If you want me to stop talking so badly, fight back. Change my mind. I’d like to see you try.”

Those words got me. Breathing heavily, I looked around, spotted a fallen tree branch, and smacked him upside the head with it before he could say anything else. I held it up to his chest and shoved him against the hood of a busted van.

“Listen to me, Hodek,” I managed to get out between clenched teeth. Something felt so oddly familiar about this, but I was too scared and angry to think about what it could be. “I asked you to stay with us because I love you. Okay? What else did you expect me to do? I’m not going to just leave you here! You’ve helped me this far, and what do I have to show for it? So stop saying whatever it was about my own  _ family _ twisting my brain, because it’s not true. You don’t know them. And I…” my arms started shaking from keeping him pinned down for this long. I saw a tiny stream of blood escape his mouth as he looked at me with a mixture of heartbreak and contempt. I felt like breaking, like collapsing and letting him finish me off, right then and there.

“…I don’t want to fight you,” I whispered.

“Then kill me. It would be so easy.” His voice was even more hoarse than before, as if at any moment he’d go over the edge. “God…I don’t know why I didn’t think about any of this. I thought that maybe, just maybe, we could be…and I was starting to like you. But now you’ve gotten what you wanted. So just kill me.”

I shook my head.

“I don’t want that, either. Don’t you get it? I can’t  _ do _ this. I can’t live knowing I left you, but I can’t live knowing I left my family either. After all these years…” I laughed the tiniest bit and released the branch, letting it fall to the ground.

“After all these years, the universe still won’t give me a break. I always get the impossible choices. I killed my old parents to get here. I offed tons of innocent people to only meet  _ half _ of who I remember. And now I have to get rid of you?”

I hung my head and wiped my eyes underneath my mask. My face was greeted with nice, cool air, but I didn’t give a shit. I couldn’t bear to look at him now. It felt like the world was frozen. After a while, he spoke softly, and I was reminded of the real Jeff Hodek. The one I’d known for the past year.

“I still care about you. I do. But I’d rather kill you myself than wonder who else will do it once we go our separate ways.”

“That’s really stupid of you,” I muttered, about to reach for his hand to ground myself. But before I could, he gently lifted my chin and looked me in the eye. His fire had been put out as fast as it ignited. It didn’t take long for us to start smiling, if only a little bit. Staring at his face and thinking about everything that had come before this seemed to flip a switch in my head. But then I remembered.

“If I’d been wearing one of those ties…you would be dead.”

“You don’t need to worry about that right now. Max, I—”

“Masquerade!”

We both snapped our heads in the direction of the voice, and I saw that somebody whose name never stuck with me had been sent out. He was panting and looked like he’d just pried something off of his neck. He stopped when he spotted the two of us on a car hood and my coat on the ground.

“…I won’t ask. But Anniversary needs you back down here. And if that’s not enough—”

“I-it is. We’ll be right there,” I interrupted and dragged Jeff along back inside, my face flushing red. He reluctantly let me lead him down the stairs and to the ballroom, where…


	41. Chapter 41

Everyone had backed up against the wall. A few people were muffling their own screams. Anniversary had taken someone under her arm, breathing heavily and comforting them as best she could. And one of our brothers was lying, dead, in the middle of the floor.

I looked around the room for answers. For longer than I could take, I got none. Just frightened stares, hushed whispers, and pointing fingers. My arm tightened around Jeff’s, who also looked like he didn’t know exactly what to do from here.

“Max…I think we should leave. Maybe it’s best that we don’t know what—”

“Hodek, you’re going to be the death of me someday. We are  _ not _ going now.” I gave him a stern sideways look and walked over to Anni, making sure to steer clear of the body on the ground. I felt a little shaken myself, though I had no idea what had just happened. She didn’t acknowledge me, only kept reassuring who I realized was another one of my original sisters, Iris. The black paint on and around her eyes was dripping down her face, and she kept clutching at her own bow tie like a precious relic.

“Why didn’t it do anything. Why didn’t  _ I  _ do anything? I could have stopped him. I…”

“Shh. It’s okay. It’s not your fault.” Anni looked up to address the room, her gaze passing right over me without any kind of registration. “It’s not  _ anyone’s  _ fault.” She sighed shakily. “Everybody…clear out. Go back to your quarters. I’m going to lay Jade to rest and later we can all say our goodbyes.”

“No,” I heard from nearly everyone within earshot, their protests starting to clamor much to Anni’s dismay. She seemed to panic, then looked down at some contraption on her wrist and pushed a button at random. At once, everybody except for her, Hodek and I yelled in pain and covered their ears. It was like some dog whistle for them, though I couldn’t tell what was causing it. Suddenly regretful, Anni pressed the button again and the pain seemed to stop.

“Go to bed. There are a couple spare meals in the dining hall if you’re still hungry, but nobody stays in this room unless I specifically ask you to. Now go.”

She sounded more mad and anguished than I’d ever heard her, and I was tempted to wave in front of her face to see if she even knew I was there. But I knew that now wasn’t the time to do anything like that. The room quickly emptied except for the three of us. When I didn’t move from my spot, and neither did Jeff, she turned her back on us and started reorganizing the various new ties in a nearby table drawer.

“I said  _ everybody  _ clear out. That includes you and your friend, Masquie.”

“I…someone said you wanted me to come back inside. Was it just so you could tell me to go, along with everyone else?”

“Please don’t make this more difficult than it has to be.”

“That’s what  _ you’re _ doing. You’re making this more difficult for yourself. Let me help. For once.” I took a step forward and placed a hand on her arm. I couldn’t see her face, but she seemed to be near tears. That was the thing about Anniversary; she wasn’t easy to break down, but this combined with whatever happened earlier this evening was enough to do the trick. She turned around faster than I could even see and crushed me in a hug. Though startled, I held her tightly and muttered, “It's going to be okay” into her shoulder. She let go of me, took a deep breath, and wiped her eyes.

“Oh, you’re too helpful for your own good. We should have known better than to keep you for ourselves,” she said in what otherwise would have been a joking manner. But for some reason, I had a feeling she meant it this time. I dismissed it, noticing that Hodek had managed to detach himself from me and was now crouching by the corpse with pure curiosity. I resisted the urge to comment on it and instead turned back to Anni.

“Can you tell me what happened? Who did this?”

After a sad, reverent look at the limp body, she narrowed her eyes.

“It was Jade. He just…completely lost it. One minute he was fine, but then he put on his bow tie when I reminded him and next thing I knew he’d collapsed on the floor. Then the next he just charged at random people, out for blood. None of the others’ ties worked. Nobody responded, they didn’t  _ think _ to. He almost killed Iris. I had to…” She cut herself off, not willing to say anything further than that. I swallowed.

“Anni, I’m so sorry. I could have…maybe I could have held him back before things got out of hand, but instead I was out looking for—”

“Don’t you dare blame yourself, Masquie. You know better than that. I  _ know  _ you know better than that. Right now, we can’t focus on who did what or why things went the way they did. What we need to do is find either Altaris or the Elder,  _ ASAP. _ We’ve gone for too long without a real leader, and look what happened. What the hell did…” she looked up at me as if she suspected me of something.

“You said you found Event dead in a cabin.”

“Yes. What about it?”

She twiddled her thumbs and reluctantly sat by our former brother’s body, unclipping his bow tie and examining it with care. “That would be a start. There isn’t any chance you could lead a team and try to find anything useful on him, is there?” I was about to answer when I saw that she was ready to put the tie around her own neck, and I instinctively tried to rip it out of her hand. She held it out of my reach, giving me a funny look.

“Woah, there! What are you—”

“Don’t put that on.”

“…why?”

I pointed at Jade without a second thought. “Isn’t it a little weird that as soon as he put on that tie, he went crazy? I don’t think you should test it out on yourself.”

“Masquie, what are you saying? These ties are the Elder’s invention! She wouldn’t make something to hurt us.”

“No, she wouldn’t. But I think that one’s gone haywire. At least try a different one.” I sighed and held out my hand. She reluctantly gave me the bow tie.

“Fine. Still, we have to act fast. I need you to make a new division and take them out to find someone by the given name of Alexandra Schröder. It’s more likely she goes by that since we—”

“Alex is dead.”

I looked behind me to see that Jeff was now leaning against a wall, simply listening to us. His face read strain, but it didn’t show in his voice. He sounded as calm as ever.

“She was killed by someone named Clockwork. I saw it myself. Unbelievable, how quick she went down. I wouldn’t bother looking for her anymore.”

I wanted to protest, though I didn’t exactly have any good reason to. I knew he was lying about something. But I also knew that if I pointed it out, I might just make things worse. So I kept my mouth shut and turned back to Anni, whose hands were shaking. She’d picked a new bow tie off of a nearby table, and was now holding it tightly to her chest. After what seemed like forever she gave it one last desperate look, whispered, “Tell me what to do,” and clipped it onto herself.

_ What’s that supposed to mean? _

Without so much as another breath she fell flat on the ground, with her eyes still open. I immediately ran to her side, not sure of what to do.

“Anniversary,” I muttered.

She didn’t respond.

_ “Anniversary.” _

Still nothing.

I could have sworn there was static building in my mind. I started shaking her, I tried ripping the tie off but some part of it had attached itself to her neck. Strangely, I didn’t get the feeling she was dead, but I was just as frantic in my thoughts and actions as if she were. 

Then she sat straight up.

I shifted back. She didn’t look like herself. Her expression had gone completely blank for a moment, but then she blinked and looked around herself as if this all were new to her.

_ What just happened? _

“Anni…?” It felt almost impossible to talk right now. She ignored me and rubbed the back of her head, wincing.

“She just  _ had  _ to be standing…oh, well. This will do.”

There was a small pause as she realized I was sitting right next to her. Her eyes lost their previous glaze.

“Oh. Well, hello there,” she said, smiling politely like she’d just run into an old friend. Something in her voice was different, but I couldn’t point out exactly what. She still sounded like  _ Anni _ . But the way she talked now was off-putting. She stood up and I followed suit. Hodek grabbed my shoulder and gently pushed me back, like he knew he was going to have to defend me. 

“How funny, Masquerade. I thought I’d never see you again.”

My blood ran cold at her new tone. For a minute, I was certain that Hodek’s demon had come back to torment us, but the look on his face told me otherwise. It seemed that  _ he _ didn’t even recognize what was in front of him.

“…Anniversary, was it? That’s not you. Who’s there, how are you talking?”

“Why don’t you ask—” she started, looking in my direction, but then frowned. “Hm. Oh, of course, of course. I never tested them out on  _ you. _ This will be tricky.”

Anni stumbled forward, and Hodek and I respectively took a step back. He drew his knife again, but I wasn’t ready to attack just yet. I had a weird feeling that despite everything, I wouldn’t want to hurt whatever was inhabiting her body. She continued talking.

“Oh, you two certainly are a  _ sight _ . Callow…and callous. It’s just too perfect. Well, it would be, at least. If you weren’t getting in the way of things.”

“Why are you here. What are you doing in her body,” I asked, my voice shaking. Anni paused and tilted her head.

“This is a new attitude. You never had a problem with staying by your Elder’s side before. I wonder what could be different this time.”

I almost felt my heart stop, and all the years of looking and wishing for just a stroke of luck seemed to come flying back to me.

“…it’s you.”


	42. Chapter 42

Anni’s mouth formed a grotesque, frightening smile, but I couldn’t care less.

“Of course it is, Masquie. I would never truly leave you. I had a feeling you’d be here soon, but I seem to have been late to the party. Tell me, who is our guest?” My Elder nodded towards Hodek, who I’d expected to be a deer in headlights but actually looked quite calm. He glared onward.

“Max, what am I looking at right now. Why haven’t we left yet.”

“It’s the Elder. Somehow, when Anni put one of the new ties on herself—”

“Far from _somehow_ , my dear. This is their main function; did you not know? I can’t simply trust others to follow through on their missions every single time. And…Jeffrey Hodek.”

His head snapped up to attention at his name, and for once he looked shamelessly afraid.

“Where to begin with you? So infamous, so known by the public…I fear it’s gone to your head. You would do well to show some respect; address my child by his true name.”

Hodek hesitated, and a look of eventual rage overtook his face. “I don’t think so, whoever the fuck you are. How do you know _my_ name? Have you been stalking us this whole time?”

The Elder’s laugh echoed around the room in a seemingly impossible way. “I've heard from your friend, Angus, very recently. He told me some of the nasty things you said about him, and I wanted to let you know that being a little more trusting might do you good. After all…you trusted my Masquerade, and look where he’s led you.”

“Where exactly would that be?” Hodek snapped, his teeth clenched. He glanced back, saw that I’d been standing frozen, and reached for my hand with just a trace of comfort lining his features. Elder smiled, as if that was precisely what she wanted him to do.

“Home,” she said. My eyebrows knit in confusion.

_This is one of her methods._

“Why do you and Anni want him to stay so badly? You never sought him out, I was never assigned to find anybody by his name. Did…did you _send_ that thing to find us? Was that why he told me to—”

I clamped a hand over my own mouth, aware that I’d let too much slip. Now Hodek knew I definitely lied to him about Angus. Elder gave me a disapproving look.

“Must you know everything, Masquie? You were always quite the inquisitive child, and I could forgive that. But it gave all of us nothing but trouble in your later years. Don’t you _want_ Jeffrey to stay here, with you? Wouldn’t that just be the best of both worlds?” She took another step forward, and the sound of her voice rang in my ears. For the first time in my life, I couldn’t stand hearing her talk.

“I want him here because he’s my friend. It feels like _you_ just—”

But before I could say anything else, she turned to Hodek again.

“And I know you were lying about my niece, Altaris. She’s inherited my… _gift_ of influence. Only a killer of the strongest will could withstand it. She is most fit to take on my former role, and as soon as I find her, everything will be back to normal. Until then, why don’t you stay?”

Jeff pinched the tip of his knife, as if he intended to prick himself on it. It didn’t look like he was too focused on what I had said. His carved smile twisted with his real one as he seemed to think.

“That sounds like a solid plan, lady. In fact, I can only see one thing going wrong.”

Without a second to waste he ran at full speed and tried to shove Anni’s body to the ground. She moved out of his path and, with remarkable force, grabbed one of his arms and twisted it behind his back. He let out an empty husk of a scream, and I heard a loud _crack_ that I did not like one bit coming from his body. He managed to reach back and cut her hand bad enough that she had to let go. I wanted to run forward, separate them as he grabbed her by the throat and to get it into their heads that this wouldn’t solve anything. But I was still frozen. I couldn’t even move my head to watch on.

Just as I was beginning to think that he might kill her, something in his gaze changed, as if he realized that the bow tie was still there. He knocked her out with a single headbutt, leaning down to slice the tie off her neck, and crushed it in his hand like a bug.

“You won’t be finding _Altaris_ Schröder anytime soon.”

* * *

 I didn’t know what to do from there. That was it. I had no idea why Hodek wanted to get rid of her voice so badly that he just _charged_ at her like that, but it was done. It was probably for the best; if I wanted to question her, I’d have to do it in person rather than in a situation where she could just leave if she wanted. I looked down at Anniversary, feeling more numb than usual.

_Wake up,_ I thought feebly. Because I knew that the Elder taking over her body couldn’t have killed her…right? Based on what I’d gathered from that exchange, this happened all the time. It had happened to _me_ more times than I could count, and I never realized it. My Elder had lied to me.

I was angry.

When he noticed I wasn’t moving a whole lot, Hodek simply sighed and grabbed my hand, leading me away from the two bodies on the ground. I tried resisting, but all the strength in me had been usurped. I gave one final attempt at jerking his arm back, and he looked at me with exhaustion.

“What is it now.”

“Why don’t you want us to find Altaris?”

He didn’t seem to know how to answer that right away.

“…Alex doesn’t just have that weird, yellow-eye thing, Max. She’s dangerous. You saw what she did to that police officer all those months ago.”

“But that’s why we—”

“And right now, she’s living with _Natalie Ouellette,_ who…well, as much as I hate to say it, she’s good at what she does. Imagine what would happen if your Elder found Alex now. Imagine the kind of power she’d have.” He seemed to realize that he was talking louder than usual and took a step back, lowering his voice.

“Besides, they’re… _she’s_ happy living in those woods, though I can’t see why.” He said it with such forced disdain that I wondered if he meant it at all. “So it won’t do much good to try and force them apart.” I noticed his breathing was uneven and looked to his strained arm. There was no visible damage, but when I reached to touch it, he flinched.

“…even so, you shouldn’t have just tried to fight her like that. Both you and Anni could’ve gotten seriously hurt.”

Jeff hesitated.

“You don’t _really_ know why that woman wants us to stay here, do you?”

I frowned. “Well, why wouldn’t she? I belong to her. She’s my Elder, I…we’re family. You know that.”

He chuckled, though I had a feeling he didn’t find anything about this funny. “Max, I have to say, you’re pretty smart. But you’ve gotten all the common sense wiped from your mind. Want the truth? She’s using us. You were raised to be a brainwashed soldier along with the rest of these people. And then, by some miraculous chance, you happen to run into _me_ , this deranged killer in the middle of the woods. You get me to help you look for your family, I end up staying for a little while, and…” He shook his head, like he was describing an odd dream he had last night. “I don’t know, it’s just a little too perfect for her. And that isn’t only—”

“Hodek, what are you talking about?! I may have a lot of questions for the Elder now, but she isn’t _using_ anyone—”

“Masquie?”

I turned around and saw that Anni was sitting up, holding her head and disoriented. I sighed with relief, both for her safety and the distraction.

“Anni. Thank god, I thought you’d be blacked out forever. Do you know what just happened?”

“I’m sorry.”

She stood up and began walking towards us, covering the part of her neck that the tie had attached itself to. She looked like she was about to cry.

“I should have listened to you. I thought she would try to help, I didn’t know what else to—”

“Anni, it’s okay. I’m not mad,” I lied. Well, kind of. I definitely wasn’t mad at _her,_ but I felt something in the pit of my stomach. Like at any moment, I would start to scream and never stop. Anni’s gaze travelled to the rows of ties in the drawer.

“I can’t believe she sounded so happy. The only thing she did was try to win your friend over, which I suppose I would have done too but she could’ve been more convincing than _that._ Why did she think…um, ‘Hodek’ was lying?”

“I’m right here,” Jeff muttered under his breath. I squeezed his hand as if to say, _Shut up._

“I don’t know. But I’m going to find out.”

She tilted her head, like the idea of me leaving again was too beyond her to even think of. “What do you mean?”

“I’m going to go after the Elder, Anni.”

She froze, then twiddled her thumbs. It must have been becoming a habit. “You mean, you're going to organize a team to find—”

“No.”

Anni’s expression froze someplace between confusion and disbelief. After a moment, she started laughing nervously.

“Masquie, you really can be too much sometimes. I mean…you, just _leaving_ again to—”

“I’m not joking.” I was starting to get annoyed with all this second-guessing. Anni looked me in the eye like she was trying to see through me, in case I was lying.

“…you can’t.”

“Yes, I can. I-I’m sure it won’t take long, she must be somewhere near our old base.”

“No. You’ve been here for _two weeks_ , that’s not enough! We have too much to catch up on, you haven’t even met all your new brothers and sisters. I can’t lose you, not again.”

“And you won’t. I promise. I’ll find the Elder, I…I’m going to find that _thing_ that told Event where to go. And I’ll use that. It can’t be more than a month of looking.”

“But Birthday—”

“It won’t _be_ like Birthday. I know how to hide, I’ve dug myself out of holes like that before.”

Anni was more than dissatisfied with this. She sighed and folded her arms as if she were lecturing a child, though I had a strange feeling she was about to cry for the third time that day. “…you promise. That has to mean something, you know. If you’re taken away, or killed, then what am I supposed to do. How am I even supposed to know what happens? We can’t use the ties anymore, we know how well that goes now.”

“He won’t be alone,” Hodek joined in from my left. I looked to him hopefully, and he gave me a mere sideways glance before continuing. “If it really means that much to you, consider this a… _group mission_ , or whatever. You should trust him more, anyway.”

Anniversary didn’t seem to know what to say to that for a minute. She raised an eyebrow and closed her eyes in defeat. “Fine. You win. There’s not much I can do to stop you. Well, there technically is, but I’m not real partial to those kinds of methods.”

“I won’t let you down, Anniversary.”

Without much more of a goodbye, I hugged her tightly before climbing up to the surface as Hodek trailed after me.


	43. Chapter 43

[JEFF]

The first thing that flew out of my mouth once we were safely above ground was, “What were you  _ thinking?” _

Max turned around and narrowed his eyes at me. “What do you mean by that?”

“Trying to go after this Elder lady, whoever the hell she is! I don’t care what kind of mother figure she might have been to you seven years ago, if I picked up anything from the last ten minutes, it’s that facing her again is  _ suicide.  _ Especially now that she’s got Angus in her pocket.”

“I need answers, Hodek. I’m not sure what’ll happen when she sees you, but she wouldn’t hurt me.”

“She  _ has  _ hurt you! She’s hurt you way too much, all these years since the minute she opened her mouth around you. You can’t just go back to her when things don’t make sense, you need to run away and never look back.”

His lip started to quiver the more I talked, and eventually he started forward again with his hands clenched into fists. “You don’t get it.”

“Then explain. Tell me what I’ve got wrong—”

“ _ Everything. _ I may be mad at the Elder, beyond belief, really, but I’m not going to just forget she exists.”

“I’m not asking you to do that.”

“Well, what  _ are  _ you asking me to do, let it all go?! Move on from my past? Because you, of all people, should know that’s bullshit.”

“I need you to promise me that we won’t actually go looking for her. She’s damaged you. It’s for your own good, it doesn’t matter if you trust her anymore or not.”

“So I just don’t follow through on what I said at all. I let Anniversary down, I abandon my  _ family _ again?”

“They’re not your—” I cut myself off and took a breath. “No. We’re not getting into this now. Let’s just go, there has to be some other rich neighborhood around here.”

“And then where do we go?”

My usual answer of, “you think  _ I _ know?” got stuck in my throat. Instead I shook my head and pat him on the shoulder, moving forward while he stayed still. I could feel that every inch of his body was about to explode just from that one touch. After countless minutes of waiting, he started talking again.

“I know that’s part of the whole  _ being on the run _ thing, but I’m sick of it. I found my home after years of searching and now I have to leave and just look somewhere else, I can’t do it. You’re unfair.”

“Life is unfair. I can’t believe  _ I’m  _ the one who has to tell you that.” I sighed and held out one hand. “Come with me. We can rest tonight if you want. I’m sorry.”

I said that more out of some imaginary obligation than because I meant it. In truth, I was more frustrated with him than sorry. Hours seemed to pass before he decided to move. He took my hand, if not begrudgingly, and let me lead the way back to the forest. I noticed something beneath the shade of a nearby tree, and upon closer inspection realized it was  _ When All Hell Breaks Loose. _ Caught up in exploring that tunnel, cave, parking lot,  _ whatever _ you want to call it, we’d forgotten our little travel kit at the edge of the forest. Unsurprisingly, most of our things had been stolen. I picked up the book, examining its spine with the faded name “Cody Lundin” becoming almost illegible. I looked to Max, whose gaze had fallen to the ground.

“I don’t like all this moving anymore than you do,” I found myself admitting. “But this is about survival. Having other goals in mind…sure, sometimes it pays off, but it also clouds up your vision. The best we can do right now is find somewhere to sleep.”

* * *

Things only started looking up once I remembered that I was still wearing that formal garbage, and in the late autumn, no less. I’d left my hoodie back at my “room” (it was becoming more and more uncomfortable to call it that now that we’d left) and the chances weren’t very high that I’d be able to get it back. Now, how does this translate to  _ anything _ getting better?

Simple. I stole a new one.

Not from a store or anything, we just revived that little habit of breaking into random homes in hopes of collecting any supplies we could get our hands on. Some girl, maybe in her late teens, had a plethora of oversized sweaters in a closet five feet from where she slept, and I was certain the one I happened to grab belonged to her boyfriend.  _ Oh, the irony, _ I thought as I threw it on and packed my dress shirt into a tight ball to burn later for warmth.

But more importantly, for the first time in a while, I felt…clean. Definitely not up to the standards of a normal, functioning human being, of course. It was just a small change that somehow managed to lift my spirits. Max noticed.

“You’ve been in a good mood,” he said eventually, trying way too hard to make it seem like he hadn’t been thinking that for days. If this was his way of inconspicuously bringing up a topic of conversation, he needed to work on it. I shrugged, looking down and playing with the strings. A little different than the last one, but I would have to get used to it.

“And? Are you making sure of something so you can successfully ruin my day later on?”

“No,” he said with such adamance that I almost stopped walking. “You know I wouldn’t do that.”

“Jeez, didn’t those people teach you how to take a joke? I just don’t want there to be empty space. That’s how I fill it up.” I furrowed my eyebrows. “So what was your point again?”

“I don’t know, I just…the only times I’ve really seen you happy is when you’re killing someone. Or worse, when you’re pretending.”

“What? When have I ever  _ pretended  _ to be happy?”

“You want a single example or a list? What I’m saying is, it’s a nice change seeing you like this. So…” he sighed, like it was taking every ounce of will in his body to say this.

“I promise.”

“…promise what?”

“I won’t try looking for the Elder. At least, not now. I know I’m not ready to face her again. It’s been too long, I’ve had so many things called into question, and, well…it seems like it’d really make you upset. I don’t know the full of whatever happened between you and Angus, but—”

“Okay, okay, you’ve made your point,” I interrupted as soon as I heard that name. His expression changed by just a fraction, but I knew it was leaning towards some kind of pity.  _ Great. I really couldn’t stand to just  _ listen _ to him talk about that asshole, now he thinks my feelings are hurt, or something. _ I scoffed and turned my head a little bit more towards him. “You know, you didn’t have to give me a whole explanation. One sentence would’ve been fine.”

“Alright…”

God, I could even feel it in his voice. I decided to change the subject.

“Uh, by the way.”

“Yeah?”

With some reluctance, I pulled Max’s pliers, which he’d left in his room, from my pocket and held them out for him to take. He opened his mouth to speak, but apparently couldn’t find the words. All he was able to produce with the minute I gave him was, “Why?” I gave in to a smirk.

“You’re adorable. I’m a collector, remember? I’m not gonna blow a chance to get more weapons, let alone  _ leave  _ any behind. Where do you think I got that knife when we fought outside the dance?”

“I don’t know, I just assumed you already had one on you.” His face journeyed from confusion to panic to disappointment within a second, and he gave me another one of his trademarked stern looks. “Don’t tell me you stole anything from Candy, did—?”

“Hell no. The less ties I’ve got to that place, the better. I wouldn’t want them on my tail out here, ‘specially since Anni thinks we’re still on that mission to find what’s-her-face.”

Max winced at that remark.  _ “Please _ don’t make me regret my choice, Hodek. If you can afford to be so kind.”

“Fine.” I waited a couple seconds longer. “So are you gonna take ‘em or not?”

He sighed again. “Sure. Um…thank you.” He held the pliers between his thumb and forefinger, as if he found them just the slightest bit disgusting now. As if he’d been hit with the sudden realization of how much damage they’ve actually done. I was tempted to roll my eyes.  _ He’s really trying to stay innocent. Still? _

“And you can stop looking at me like that,” he added, lifting his mask about a centimeter for some air. I furrowed my eyebrows.

“Like what?”

“Like you did the first few days we knew each other.”

_ How does he remember  _ that?

“Why? Is it making you  _ uncomfortable?”  _ I said, leaning closer and nudging him in the arm. He snickered and nudged me back.

“You were so condescending back then, I swear…”

“Oh, was I?”

“What I’m  _ saying _ is that you don’t have to doubt me anymore, Hodek. We’re still partners. Right?”

Though he tried to hide it, I could hear a thin trace of worry in his voice on that last word. I decided to give up on the teasing, instead holding out my hand with a tiny smile.

“Yeah. Still partners.”

He shook it, but neither of us let go.


	44. Chapter 44

I was more ready than ever to just chill out. Not completely stop moving around, of course, because that would probably be unavoidable until I died. But what Max had said earlier ended up getting to me almost a week later, and no matter how much I tried swatting the idea away, it would always come back even stronger; I was tired.

_Oh, Jeff, you’re always tired_ —yeah, cut the crap and just listen. I was beginning to feel just as sick of this life as he was, though I still couldn’t tell exactly what was going on in his head after all this time. I wasn’t halfway close to admitting that to him; he could survive without another one of his little victories for now. But neither of us were prepared for that harsh pull back into his past, just waiting for us at the end of an old street.

We turned a corner, deep into the avenues of some quiet town. The sidewalk was uneven, cobbled together from ten different kinds of stone and concrete; all the cracks and sinkholes in the road made me wonder how anybody was expected to get five feet from their home in an automobile. The strangest part was, almost every house that we passed was a decent size, freshly painted, and seemingly brand-new. I guessed that either these citizens were all sound sleepers at night or nobody actually lived here, because when we made our visit there were no signs of life, and no light but the moon’s.

“I think it’s about time we stop resting one night at a time in random places that no one thinks to go. What do you say we try upgrading to one of these?” I said eventually, drumming my fingers against the wood of a particularly old and frail house. It was one of the few we could find that _didn’t_ look like it had popped straight out of a Barbie catalog. Max sighed; I hadn’t seen him look this defeated since we first left the base. He kept looking around like this place was just a little too familiar to him.

“You know we can’t do that. Didn’t you say last week that—”

“And I’m not going back on it. I’m saying that we could spend a couple of nights here, avoid any suspicion, maybe get ourselves a new travel kit with whatever’s inside. We’ll be living there, but we won’t be _living there,_ if you get me.”

“…fine. But can we look around a little more before settling anywhere, even if it’s only for a few days? There’s something off about this neighborhood, I just need to…”

His hands started to shake, though I didn’t think he even noticed it. Something wasn’t sitting right with me, either, but I wasn’t about to say it. I shrugged and gave him a doubtful sideways glance before saying, “Sure. But I’m already pretty partial to this old beauty right here.” I patted the cracked wall affectionately, knowing full well that using the word “beauty” to describe this house was a stretch. Max fiddled with his hair tie (the hair was so long he didn’t have to reach back far) as he looked around the corner.

“Hey, come look at this, Hodek,” he said, waving me forward. I tried following his line of sight, but all I could see was a giant hedge wrapping around what I could only assume was another house’s backyard. I raised my eyebrows.

“Wow, a bunch of leaves.”

“They look too new. They weren’t there before.”

“What are—you mean, they just appeared five minutes ago?”

He turned his head, but he still wasn’t looking at me. “No, I…I know this place. I don’t know _where_ I know it from, but…”

“Let’s go in.”

_“What.”_

“You said we could look around! Besides, it doesn’t seem like anyone even lives here. I want to see what’s on the other side, just for a second.”

I sighed. “Okay, okay. I guess we have a lot of time, anyway.”

He practically dove into a spot in the hedge where the branches were just wide enough to fit a body, and didn’t bother waving me over. I followed, still with some reluctance but mostly out of curiosity. If he really did know this place, somehow, maybe something interesting was waiting for us there.

[MASQ]

As we fought our way through the bushes, I saw more and more of the back of another old house peeking out from the other side. Its wood was rotting, the paint was almost completely faded but I recognized every square inch. My heart stopped, and so did I. Hodek nearly ran into me from behind.

“Why’d you stop?” he half-whispered. I blinked and slowly turned around to face him.

“Hodek…look me in the eye and tell me one thing.”

“What?”

“Tell me I haven’t traveled in a circle.”

He seemed to understand immediately. His face sobered a significant amount, and he stared ahead, silent, at my old house. The house that I was dragged back to seven years ago when my family had been discovered. The house my so-called “parents” died in.

After what felt like forever, I took one step forward and then another. It was taking all of my strength just to look at this place again. Ivy and moss had conquered almost half of its structure, it was impossible to believe that anybody could be residing here now. Without another word, I opened the back screen door, dirt crumbling to the ground as its hinges squeaked in protest. Cobwebs filled the corners so thickly, you wouldn’t be able to tell if the walls had been repainted by looking at them. I coughed on dusty air, continuing into the living room. The windows had been boarded up, although if you put your face about an inch from them you could look out into the yard through a tiny crack between the wood.

I saw a sign posted just a couple feet from the sidewalk that read, “For Sale.”

For Sale.

My pulse started racing again, and I could almost feel the color retreat from my face. Why would they sell this place? Who would want to buy it? How long had that been there?

I turned and jumped at the sight of Hodek standing directly behind me with his usual stony expression. He seemed to realize that he’d frightened me yet showed no signs of sympathy this time. It looked like he wanted to say something, but every time he opened his mouth nothing would come out. I gazed around the room, everything falling into place the more I tried remembering. I could almost make out a faint white outline on the floor. An outline of a dead body. I didn’t question it; besides, I already knew where the other one lay.

* * *

 At 19 years old, I’d been digging pills from the bottom of fluorescent orange bottles routinely. It had been almost three years since I was sent back to my parents and I hated every second of it. Even when my sister visited from college during my first summer “home,” I felt nothing. My parents insisted that I get a haircut; after all those years, it’d grown almost 3 feet. Finally, I forced a grin and politely declined, “No, I kind of like it this way.”

That was a lie. I loved it that way.

Aggressive thoughts and tendencies towards them had only been intensifying, and every day with the little time I was allowed online I would search the names of various people I trusted. No helpful results came up, only generic Facebook accounts and requests to schedule events from the Calendar app.

Maybe if I’d spent all of my life truly believing that they were my family, I would have been content. But I couldn’t live like this. Not after everything I’d seen.

I was in the kitchen when it finally happened.

“Max, I'm going out. Remember to take your medicine,” my mother called from upstairs. She absolutely refused to call them _meds,_ probably for fear of sounding too harsh. As she walked downstairs, something clicked in my brain. I saw my mask sitting on the kitchen counter, and immediately grasped for it. Digging through drawers and cabinets, I pulled out a roll of sharp twine, feeling the roughness between my fingers. _This will do nicely,_ I thought, my heart pounding with fear and hatred.

When “mom” made for the front door, what she was met with was a blue mask and a long piece of rope wrapped tightly around her neck.

While she laid at my feet, I recalled what I’d overheard one day from outside the psychiatrist’s office.

_“I would cut my legs off to help him.”_

Re-opening a drawer, I snatched a pair of wickedly sharp pliers and took off my mother's left sock and shoe. I ran one of the blades roughly across her ankle, drawing blood.

I wasted no time in fulfilling her promise after that.

Gazing contentedly at the grotesque mess in front of me, I thought, _Thank you, “mom.” Maybe you did help me after all._

They were never my parents. They were liars and criminals who never _really_ cared about me. I wondered why I had to keep reminding myself of that.

I wondered why once they were both gone, I couldn’t help but feel like I was about to cry.

A strange resentment began to rise in me towards the “For Sale” sign in the front yard, worn and dirty from years of standing there. I didn’t move when Hodek placed a hand on my shoulder, and I didn’t budge when he pulled on my arm to leave.

_Why do I want to stay? None of this matters anymore. I’ve already found my_ real _family._

I squeezed my eyes shut, then opened them again.

_And even they weren’t enough. Can I trust anyone? Anyone besides—_

“Max. I…I think I know what’s going on here, but we really need to go. There’s nothing for us here.”

“Maybe not for you,” I said without thinking. He looked taken aback, and I probably would have been, too. After a brief moment of silence, I straightened my collar and cleared my throat.

“…I mean, I think we should try and see if we can find anything useful. Since it hasn’t been completely cleared out, i-it’s just common sense to look through the place.”

“Are you even going to tell me what happened here?”

I froze, then started forward into the kitchen without another word. _Twine,_ I thought. _I definitely don’t have enough twine on me right now._


	45. Chapter 45

We ended up staying in the house Hodek had chosen before; however strange and painful it might’ve felt to sleep less than a block from my old house, I wasn’t going to argue now. Though he didn’t say anything about it, he seemed more irritated at me than during our argument after leaving the base. I couldn’t place exactly why, and that gave me even more of a horrible feeling.

We slept in the basement, squeezing ourselves into respective corners near the stairs. It was a relief to have this much space but still be under shelter, in case somebody came around and we had to leave fast. It was only around the middle of our second night that I started feeling disconcerted, and it was only the third that I woke up in a cold sweat and turned to see Hodek walking out.

He seemed to be muttering to himself, but there was a strangely “real” quality to it, if that makes any sense. It was like he truly believed he was talking to someone else, like they were leading him out of the house. I stood up to follow him, but froze in place when I caught sight of another person standing beside him. Their clothes were identical to mine, and so was their hair, shoes, I could even make out my own _voice_ in the otherwise silent darkness. I caught my breath and looked at my hands. They were definitely still there; this wasn’t some out-of-body experience. Without thinking about what it might do, I broke out of the stillness and reached out to grab Hodek’s shoulder. He whirled around, eyes widened even further than usual, and swatted me away instinctively.

“That’s not me,” I half-whispered. He looked back and forth between me and whoever this imposter was, a look of horror dawning on his face, and without so much as another look at other-me drew his knife and sliced their head off. Their entire body seemed to disintegrate, and all the color in their form faded to pure black as they poured, clothes and all, onto the ground like a mound of sand.

“I said never again, and I meant that, dammit!” Hodek said to himself, covering his mouth with his free hand. He looked beyond horrified, though I had a feeling that it didn’t have anything to do with the fact that he was watching a copy of me crumble to the ground.

_ “You really are no fun, Jeffrey. I mean, even somebody  _ smarter  _ than you would’ve been more entertaining.” _

That voice scraped my spine and I took an automatic step back.  _ Angus. _

_ “But you don’t have your brains to offer, no. You’re just stubborn.” _

“If you find me that boring, then why don’t you leave me alone?” Hodek whispered, still looking down at the now fading pile of dust on the floor. It was like he was almost afraid of talking back at this point. Or simply tired. Angus laughed, an awful sound that shouldn’t reach the worst of ears.

_ “I’m afraid I can’t do that now, old friend. Or should I say, old  _ friends?”

“You’ve disappointed me so much, Masquerade.”

That didn’t come from Hodek. And it definitely wasn’t Angus talking anymore, either. I turned around, my heart in my throat, but saw nothing. I knew that voice. I only wished I wasn’t hearing it now, of all the times.

“Leave me alone. Both of you. Whatever you’re going to say, i-it won’t work.”

“How can you be so sure of that? How can you be so sure of yourself, of this man you call your…’partner,’ over your own family?”

“You’re not…”

I choked on the words before I could spit them out.

_ What are you doing? What were you just about to say?! This is beneath you. Apologize to your Elder, right now. _

Now,  _ that  _ was me. I looked at my feet and took in tiny, shallow breaths.

“Please. Go,” I managed to say, my voice shaking. The silence that followed almost convinced me for a moment that they had left, but then I heard a deep, irritated sigh.

“I only wished to help you, Masquerade. I really did. You were so lost, and you belonged to us. You’ve known your dear brothers and sisters for longer than you can recall, and yet you’re letting  _ him  _ tell you what is right and wrong, true and false?” The disgust in her voice was palpable. I flinched at the words, not knowing why they felt so wrong.

_ Think for yourself for once, dammit! _

“…I belonged  _ with  _ you, not to you.”

She didn’t respond, which gave me more time to find the faults in her statements. I took a step forward, growing annoyed.

“You took me underground when I was ten. I remember what happened perfectly.”

My heartbeat quickened when she stayed silent yet again. I took another step, narrowing my eyes as I replayed the last thing she’d said in my mind.

“And Hodek hasn’t told me what’s right and wrong, he tells me how he truly feels. He does it to protect me.” I glared at the ceiling, knowing that even if the Elder could see me all around, I’d be reaching her like this.

“And he does it better than you  _ ever _ did.”

I couldn’t tell for the life of me after that realization whether my Elder was furious at me, or confused, or just kept her mouth closed out of pure shock. Strangely, I didn’t feel regret for any of what I’d said in that moment. Not after a few seconds, not a minute, not one bit for all the time it took for her to speak again.

“Hm,” she began in an exceedingly,  _ would you look at that  _ tone. She didn’t sound angry, which I found both strange and frightening.

“Well, if that’s how it is…I suppose I’ll just have to accept it,” she said with an odd, almost forced air of defeat. “There is nothing I can say to make you come back to the base. If you’re going to reject your family—”

“I don’t reject the family,” I interrupted, feeling mild surprise that she didn’t just continue over me. “I reject  _ you _ . If you really cared for me, you wouldn’t be working with that demon. He tried to make me kill my only friend, more than once, and you wouldn’t have cared as long as it meant I came back to you! You know…” I caught my breath, feeling as if I would collapse any second. “…you were never my mother, but I’m glad it stayed that way, because you’re not a very good one.”

There was yet another long, dreadful silence. I heard my words echoing around the room, playing on repeat in my head.

“…but, Masquie, what makes you think I can’t force you to return to us?” Elder let out a tiny laugh. “No, sorry. I could always force you, you know that. What makes you think I _won’t?”_

“I’ll fight,” I said without a second thought. “My Elder, I was going to try and find you. I wanted to see for myself what had changed, why you were acting so different. Why you all of a sudden wanted Hodek to stay, why you didn’t seem to care at all that Jade was dead because of  _ your  _ invention.” I looked at my feet, at the calluses on my hand, the scar on my wrist, and finally I reached up to graze the mark on my neck. The mark that my bow tie had left when I was searched by police and paramedics, seven years ago.

“But I can’t. Because I know what will happen once I reach you, and it’s not worth it. Maybe it’s best if I don’t know why you do the things you do. Maybe all I needed to know was that Anni, Birthday, Event, me,  _ everyone _ …to you, they’re just tools. They might not be as happy as before, with you gone and Anniversary as just some replacement, but then again, you never really left. You’re still controlling them. You're still…”

I couldn’t seem to talk anymore. At first, I thought I was holding myself back, but when I opened my mouth to try and speak again, nothing came out. The Elder sighed.

“You know, I thought I might like you better without all of your questions and irritating curiosity. But thinking and speaking for yourself like this, not even giving  _ your Elder _ the benefit of the doubt?”

Something started ringing loudly in my ears, and I held my head and sank to my knees. It seemed that Hodek was on the verge of doing the same.

“Perhaps you would be better off simply not thinking at all.”

I tried to at least scream, but it felt like something was pinching my throat closed.  _ What the fuck?! _

Someone grabbed my shoulder, and I started before realizing it was Hodek. The corners of his mouth looked like they were about to split and make his “smile” a fresh wound again. His eyes scanned the air for any traces of the Elder or Angus, but found nothing as far as I could see. That only seemed to make him angrier.

“If I ever catch you in my sight, you’re dead. Head chopped off, limbs hacked to pieces, tongue sliced in half and eyes gouged out  _ dead. _ Understand?”

“Whatever you say, ‘Hodek.’ Bless your heart; you couldn’t even finish off my Altaris yourself. How well do you think you’ll fare…”

The ringing grew louder and more painful, until I thought my skull was going to split open.

“…against someone who _really_ knows how to use her power?”

“Get out!” He yelled.

_ “And don’t you even  _ think _ this means I can’t still do what I please. Just because lovely Miss Schröder and I have a deal doesn’t mean that I can’t continue wreaking havoc, getting inside your head, making you do the most horrid things for my own amusement. And, Masquerade…” _

I didn’t dare look up. I squeezed my eyes shut, still clutching my head, trying to make the awful noise go away. But something lifted my chin, and when I cautiously opened one eye I was faced with a pitch black void from which no light seemed able to escape.

_ “Keep up the good work.” _

“Wh-what?” I said.

_ “What?” _ Hodek said, his voice fading, drowned out by a soft hum that had started to replace the ringing. Before I could ask any further questions, it all disappeared and I was back in the basement, Hodek catching me as I fell back.

_ Can I talk again…? _

“Max.”

I said nothing.

_ “Max.  _ Max, are you okay?” The words came out choppily, like he had to muster everything he could just to get them out one at a time. “God…I should have known. I should have expected this, I should know him better, I should have figured out right away that it wasn’t you—”

“I can’t believe I did that,” I muttered to myself, though I could barely raise my voice above a whisper. “I just…talked back to the Elder, I said all those things to her, she nearly killed me…!”

“I don’t think she was aiming to  _ kill  _ you exactly.”

“Well, then what was she going to do?” I asked, my voice shaking. He didn’t answer me, and I didn’t get the feeling that it was because he didn’t know. It was almost like he was afraid to say it. I let it go for the time being; I already had another question on my mind.

“…has he done that before?”

With the other stretch of silence that followed, I turned back to him, shifting myself so that I could stand up properly if I needed to. A look of confusion and shame crossed his face.

“What do you mean?”

“Has he pretended to be me?”

“…yeah. Uh, he has.” Hodek averted his eyes, and his hands started twitching. “That fucking…I swear, I’ll find a way to kill him. I don’t care if he’s a demon, or a ghost, or whatever the  _ hell _ he is, I’ll do it somehow. I can’t keep living like this. I can’t keep letting him…” he trailed off, gaze shifting back to me.

“Alright, buddy. Time for another promise.”

“What? Um, sure, I guess. What is it…?”

“Promise me you won’t wake up until sunrise. And if you do, don’t even think about leaving this place until I’m awake, too.”

For some reason, hearing that reassured me. It told me that even though things were falling apart, and we didn’t have a plan, that he was at least trying to come up with one. I took a deep breath and let it out, concentrating on the night air filling my lungs.

“That, I can do.”

“Promise?” The amount of desperation in his eyes struck me oddly. I nodded, letting my fingertips brush over his for a sense of stability.

“Promise.”


	46. Chapter 46

I expected that I would be scared into staying awake the rest of the night after what had just happened, but I ended up falling asleep even faster than usual. At least, my body felt a little too well-rested in the morning for me to have possibly stayed up. The first thing I saw was Hodek sitting up and facing the stairway, unmoving, with his hands curled into fists. I stood up and tapped him on the shoulder. To my surprise, he didn’t react.

“Couldn’t sleep?”

“Eh. Probably could if I wanted to,” he said, his voice empty and dry. I took a breath and tried following his line of sight, but it seemed he was just staring at a chip in the wall paint.

“And let me guess—you stayed up in case you needed to save yourself, and definitely not because you care about me in the slightest?”

“Of course,” he said with a kind of forced absentmindedness.

_Of course._

I sat down beside him, trying to catch his eye with little success. It was almost as if he wanted to distance himself from me, at least for a few minutes, but didn’t care enough to make an effort. A sudden sense of hopelessness began to absorb me the more we sat there in silence.

“Hodek, do you think…maybe we should give up?”

He scoffed, though I could tell he was surprised. “And what, lay down and die on the spot?”

“All I’m saying is that no matter where we go, _those two_ will always find us somehow,” I said, trying to come up with a kinder phrase for somebody like the Elder and a literal demon. “Why we’re even worth their time, I’ll never know, but you heard what they said. This isn’t going to go away. What’s the point of even trying to fight, you know?” I let my voice drop to a whisper, hugging my knees close. Hodek was silent for a moment, then threw his hands up.

“You think _I_ wasn’t thinking that a few hours ago? Look, I gave up trying to avoid Angus years before you came around. When he finally left, I couldn’t figure out what to do with myself now that I’d ‘won,’ or whatever, but then he tried using you back at the trapdoor. That’s when it really set in that he would always be around. And despite it all, I was ready.”

“So what? So we’re just doomed to live like this forever?”

“Uh, yeah. But you’re saying that like it’s the end of the world. How do you think I got here? Do you think all those charges and police chases and getting confused with that little punk Jeff Woods just went away one day, and I was free?”

I lifted my head to glare at him. “That’s different. You’re able to hide from all that, _this_ is going to weed us out and haunt us until we either die or…” I couldn’t bring myself to say the next part out loud. I simply sighed and nodded at the ground as if to say, _you know._ Hodek furrowed his eyebrows.

“We’re not splitting up anytime soon, if that’s what you’re worried about. But I’m not saying we should try hiding from them anymore, Max. I’m saying we could adapt. Learn to live with it. I mean, nobody said this was going to be easy in the first place.” He turned on his spot and took one of my hands.

“And who knows; maybe one day we’ll get lucky, find the Elder ourselves. And when that day comes, we’ll throw every last punch and slice we’ve got at her until she stops this bullshit. Right?”

“…right.” As much as I tried to stop it, exhaustion and defeat managed to find their way into my voice. Hodek sighed, stood up, dusted off the back of his sweater and made his way up the stairs, pausing in the middle to see if I was going to follow. A jolt of realization shook me, and my eyes scanned the rest of the basement to just to make sure…

“Uh, yeah,” Hodek said. “It’s really me. Dunno if Angus could slander himself _or_ the Elder for his life.”

“I-I know, I just—”

“No, I get it. Come on, this place won’t do much for us anymore. Do you have your pliers, rope, whatever you carry with you these days?”

I checked my beltline and pushed a stray lock of hair out of my face. “Yes.”

When we started back up the street and I turned to take one last look at the house, I saw a single word in large letters painted on one of the walls, where before there had been nothing but overgrown ivy:

“TRAITOR”

* * *

Hodek didn’t let me in on where we were going this time. He simply led the way and gave me a sideways glare whenever I opened my mouth to ask him a question. It seemed he didn’t want anything about our path to be overheard, whether it be out loud or even in his own mind—several times, he looked a bit lost himself. _So this is what he meant by “adapt.”_

We continued from there, feeling the slightest bit better about our situation. We carried on, breaking into houses, scavenging, disposing of anybody in our path that might have caused trouble. I was still reluctant to kill, of course, at least as brutally as Hodek did. Every new body marked with an X through their heart, a smile carved into their face, or a simple red line across their neck still felt like another cut in the same place to me. But this was survival. Even so, I wasn’t sure if I could bring myself to kill someone in cold blood, purely because I _wanted_ to. Again, Hodek didn’t have any problems with that right now. The confrontation with Angus and the Elder had left both of us tired and bitter. He was bound to want to take some of his anger out on the first “expendable” person he saw, whether he realized it or not. I did, at the very least.

It was a relatively calm day; we’d decided to take a small break from our near-weekly house hunt and simply walk around, looking for anything interesting to do. We had recently gotten lucky in the “how are we going to get our next meal” department, and figured some attempted relaxation couldn’t hurt. 

“Well? Anything catch your eye on this…” Hodek made a face of mild disgust. “…impossibly boring street? I think _my_ answer should be clear enough.”

I laughed quietly and took another glance at my surroundings. He wasn’t far off; this neighborhood both looked and felt like all the life had been sucked out of it. Sure, there were a few residents here and there, the grass was green, tiny perfect houses lined each side of the road we were walking down. But nothing stood out very much, if at all. It was just a little too monotonous for my taste, everything except…

I stopped walking and narrowed my eyes curiously.

“Let’s go inside.”

“Uh, where exactly…?”

“There.”

I pointed to an old, weathered shack on the corner, with a picture of the moon painted on its left side. The longer I looked at it, even with somebody right by my side, I felt an odd and faint energy singling me out. It felt almost like something was drawing me in. Like something wanted me to see whatever was waiting there. Hodek looked apprehensive.

“…I don’t know, man. Are you sure you don’t want to go anywhere else?”

“It's just a look inside, come on. If there’s nothing dangerous, then maybe we can even stay the night.”

He gave the house another doubtful once-over, as if actively searching for reasons to trust it. He seemed to come up empty, but sighed and walked in with me anyway.

The place was surprisingly empty, even for an abandoned house. Not a single piece of furniture lay in sight, at least nothing that could be moved with one’s bare hands. As I explored, I found a kitchen island covered in wax paper, not one spot free of dust. Half of the plaster on the walls had been torn off, revealing their crumbling layers of brick underneath. I looked up to see that even the ceiling was incomplete; wooden beams lay, barely balanced, above my head. I took a mental note to be extra careful of where I stopped, turning to the stairwell before me. Oddly enough, it was the one structure in this place that seemed most finished. I heard a click from around the corner and a barely interested “hm.”

“Did you find something?” I asked.

“No, I was just trying one of the light switches. Do you think this is the same kind of place your…brother, or whatever, came to? The one with that weird ghost thing, who gave him some phone number?” Hodek let out a rueful laugh. “Cruel twist of fate, if you ask me.”

I furrowed my eyebrows, remembering the painting of the moon we saw outside. “…I don’t think this is just the same _kind_ of place.”

He took a step back out of the room he was in to give me a strange look. After a moment, he followed my eyes up the stairs, then shrugged as if to say, _we might as well._

“You thinking of going up? Just to see?”

“Yes. Besides, we might actually find something worthwhile.”

We began upwards, at least one of us wincing whenever it seemed like one of the steps would collapse at any moment. The floorboards creaked so loudly I was certain someone outside would hear, but I pressed onward, making sure to step close to the wall. There were a couple of rooms in the hall ahead of us once we’d reached the top, and from what I could tell, all of them ended after about seven feet. All except one.

It was the only room on the floor that had a window. Dark, uneven lines ran down the walls, from the ceiling to the floor. It took me a good second to realize that they were dried streams of blood.

Then I heard a voice.

It seemed so distant, and distorted that for a second I couldn’t even tell if it was real. But it rang loudly in my ears, and from the looks of it, Hodek heard it too.

**“Hello, there, gentlemen. It’s a good thing you’re here, I was just starting to get lonely…”**

His expression slowly morphed into one of both relief and disgust, as impossible as that sounds.

“Great. It’s _him_ again.”


	47. Chapter 47

He said it with such utter annoyance that I could tell this wasn’t just some other person, but I knew it wasn’t Angus, either. He stepped into the room with me and drew his knife, looking around like he was addressing the air itself.

“Come on out. I know you’re here, you stuck-up little…”

He’d barely finished his sentence before the lights went out, and what seemed to be a disheveled teenage boy appeared at his feet. He was facing the ground, but I had a strange feeling he could see us just as clearly. His face was dripping with blood, his clothes were in tatters, and there were dark bruises around his wrists and ankles like he had been locked in steel shackles for years. Despite all this, he smiled. A giddy, twisted smile.

**“Well, well. If it isn’t Mr. Hodek!”**

He tilted his head just slightly in my direction.

**“…and his little minion. I see you two haven’t gone out of business since we last met.”**

“Since we last met?” I repeated, narrowing my eyes. This strange, nauseating feeling in the air and the buzzing in my ears was familiar. Too familiar. For a second, I was afraid that maybe the Elder had found us again, but something about this boy felt different.

“Yeah, yeah, I’m a little more curious about what happened to  _ you. _ Another one of your victims didn’t work out, huh?” Hodek casually tossed the blade from hand to hand, like he was talking to this guy over lunch. He looked to me and raised an eyebrow, mouthing,  _ “our first neighborhood” _ before turning back for a response. He didn’t have to wait long.

**“Shut it. They were more than a victim, far more. At least, that’s what I thought. I suppose they** **_did_ ** **leave me…”** He seemed to think.  **“No. It was more like they killed me a second time. Who knew water would’ve done the trick.** **_Again._ ** **Hee, hee, hee!”**

_ That crying girl, the threatening messages…it can’t be— _

“Laugh it up, Ben, laugh it up. Though, come to think of it, now that you’re here I want to know where  _ you _ got the phone number of one Alex Schröder. You know, Clockwork’s little girlfriend.”

**“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”**

_ Wait. This is the dangerous entity Hodek was talking about the first night we went killing, and his name is  _ Ben? _ What am I seeing right now? _

**“Don’t you worry, Maximus Ryong. You’re not going crazy. Or maybe you are? Or maybe** **_I_ ** **am! Ha, ha!”**

While chills ran down my spine at the prospect that this  _ thing _ had just read my mind and also knew my “name,” Hodek seemed to be losing his patience. “Stop fucking around. You gave that number to a member of a dangerous cult…scratch that, you almost gave it to  _ two  _ of ‘em. I want to know where you got it.”

**“And why would you want to know? I’m in no state to be remembering these things, as you can tell. I** **_was_ ** **looking forward to some company, but if all you want to do is use me like everybody else then I have no interest in your games. Just leave me to power this house alone, would you?”**

The lights flickered on and off, as if he was proving something to us. Hodek scoffed.

“My reasons are none of your business. You, of all people, should know what it’s like to be manipulated like that. Come on…” he turned back and dragged me by the arm to face Ben, almost desperate.

“This is Max. He used to be a part of them. Take a look, see what you find.”

“Hodek, what are you…”

I stopped short when Ben finally lifted his head and looked me directly in the eyes. Except…he didn’t have any. They were just empty sockets, with blood pouring out of them and onto the floor. His eerie smile faded the longer he looked at me, and I felt as if he was somehow crawling through my subconscious.

_ What’s happening? Why am I thinking about… _

**“Oh?”** He tilted his head like he was watching a mildly interesting television program. Eventually, two glowing orange pinpricks appeared in his eyes, and his expression shifted from confused to somber. His voice lost its echoey, surreal quality, and he sounded almost like a regular person.

_ “Oh _ …oh, no.”

For the first time that day, Hodek seemed actually happy.  _ “There  _ he is. Now, what’s the deal.”

“…Jeff. You’re here? Wait, and you want to  _ save _ this one?”

“What—no, I’m not stupid. Listen, there’s a girl out there who was almost recruited by some cult twice, and the only thing standing between its members and her is Natalie Ouellette. You know who that is, right?”

“O-of course. Uh, can you run me through what just happened in the last five minutes? Because my mind’s gone all fuzzy, I can’t even remember who I was last…”

“Not important. The point is that  _ this _ ,” he said, jabbing a thumb in my direction, “is what would’ve happened to her if I didn’t pronounce her dead. Do you remember if anybody asked you for a phone number recently? Anyone you can think of.” He reached out a hand, and Ben hesitantly took it, pulling himself back up.

“I…think so. I ran into someone really strange, years ago. They didn’t even tell me their name, I had to get it out of them. They just acted like their life depended on getting the location of… _ someone _ .”

“What was the person’s name?”

“…Schröder, you said? Yeah, definitely something like that. But the first name they gave me was so weird, I thought they were playing a joke on me or something. Had to fish it out of them.”

Jeff’s glance snapped to me for a split second, and then back to Ben. He nodded. “That’s the one. See, these people, they—” he caught himself mid-sentence like he was about to curse in front of a little kid. “…nevermind. But how did you even know where to lead this guy? How did you get the number?”

“I can’t exactly explain  _ how _ . It’s like when you search someone up on the internet—that’s the best way I can describe it. I just gave them the number and went on my way…” Ben looked at me with a kind of regret that I'd never seen before.

“I’m sorry, Masquerade. I couldn’t help you.”

“That’s not what we’re here for,” Hodek interrupted, grabbing him by the shoulders. “You’re looking a little too far into him now. He’s fine, everything is fine. They don’t even know where Alex is anymore. I just need a favor.”

“Ugh. It couldn’t wait? I’m not exactly in the best state right now, and I  _ really  _ don’t want to try going back to…wherever I was before.”

“It’s small, don’t worry. I…” He looked in my direction again, then whispered something in his ear. Ben perked up.

“Really? Are you sure?”

“It’ll be just in case. I’m not going straight there once I walk out the door.”

“Okay. It’s just that, you never really told me what happened. I thought you  _ hated  _ him.”

“I…I don’t. Not really. Things have gotten so fucked up, I want to make them right. Plus, you never know.”

At that, Ben smiled softly. Then he stopped and looked around, as if only now realizing where he was.

“Wait. What am I doing here?”

Jeff raised an eyebrow.

“You said you were powering this house…?”

“Oh. I guess I must have been. Uh, hey, I’m sorry for all that before. Did he hurt you at all?”

“Nah. Well, you  _ can _ be a real jackass when you’re mixed with that thing. What even happened to bring him out, anyway?”

“I wish I knew. I think I’ll just stick to figuring out why I’m…”

After a couple of seconds, his body seemed to flicker before my eyes, and he looked past us at nothing in what must have been horror.

“Oh, my god.  _ Avery. _ ”

And he disappeared.

Once the room had gone completely silent, and a buzzing noise in my ears that I didn’t even notice at first went away, I turned to Hodek, more confused than ever.

“What was that?”

He shrugged. “Eh, nothing much. Just an old friend. Glad to see he’s finally working things out; the bastard runs from his own problems too much.”

“…oh. Is…is he dead?”

“In a way. Don’t worry about him, Max. We got all the information we need.” He turned on his heels and started walking out when I blocked him.

“Maybe you did. What just happened, wh-what did you ask him for, anyway? What were you going to say about—”

“Woah! Chill out, I didn’t mean any of what I said about your…uh, people, okay? I had to find out what I had to find out. And I got it. So we can be on our merry way.”

“But what did you  _ want? _ What did he give you, that you said you wanted to make things right with, or whatever?”

“It doesn’t concern you! You need to stop worrying about me, it was just a little tidbit. Everything’s done. Besides, we need to figure out where to go next, this neighborhood’s done for us.”

After a moment, I took a deep breath and closed my eyes. “Right. Fine. I…I do worry too much, don’t I?”

“…it’s okay. I just really don’t like questions about things like this. Uh, okay, so we can’t stay here. I’m starting to think we might have to go out of state; we’ve gone through lots of towns here, it’ll be time to split soon.”

“Lots? It’s been, like, four. How are you so sure we can’t just stay here for a little longer?”

“Four adds up when the police could be on your tail. We can’t leave any obvious path, so this is probably it for the  _ area _ .” He extended a hand towards a nearby window and swirled a finger around in the air, as if to prove his point.

“I mean, you have to agree, it would be a little suspicious if you found multiple people dead in a string, just so happening to start in the Birthday neighborhood.”

I started at that. “The  _ what _ neighborhood?”

Hodek turned to me, confused. “What’s it to you? That’s just what I call that first town we were in. Saw a house that had a bunch of birthday decorations, but they crossed out that word on all of them. It was a good laugh, but you weren’t—”

“No. We need to go back. Back to that town.”

My mind clicked and slowly connected the dots one by one.

_ Of course they weren’t able to find him. _

_ He was too close by. _

“What?  _ Why? _ We can’t go back, who knows what could find us! Cops, Clockwork…besides, there’s nothing for us there.”

“Yes, there is.” I grabbed him by the wrists and looked him in the eyes.

“You found him. You found my brother, Hodek.”


	48. Chapter 48

It took longer than I thought to reach the house where Birthday supposedly was. My heart was pounding so hard I thought it would pop right out of my chest. Jeff almost seemed like he knew what was going on, but not as much as he could bother to. Every time I remembered he was there, walking just behind me, he looked bored. It didn’t upset me. After all, with how he talked about him I assumed he hated his brother. So how could he even come close to understanding how I felt right now?

We finally reached the door he recognized, and I realized that I’d rather talk to Birthday alone than with another serial killer in tow. The last time doing that didn’t work out that much, so I told Hodek to just hang back in the shallower part of the forest while I assessed the situation. He obliged with a slightly confused look. Once I was sure he’d gone out of sight, I knocked on the door once.

Twice.

Three times, and I got no response for almost a minute. Something sunk in my stomach. I frantically knocked five more times, my brain buzzing with doubt and anxiety.

_ “Yup.” _

I heard a muffled voice behind the door, and it took me a good second to realize it was asking me what I wanted. I sighed and fiddled with the collar of my shirt.

“I-I’m here to see someone…? Someone who lives here,” I said with the little confidence I could gather. The person behind the door laughed.

_ “Okay, I should’ve guessed  _ that.  _ Who is it?” _

“…Max.” The name sounded almost foreign coming from my mouth.

_ “Huh. Uh, sorry, but I don’t think we know any Maxes. You sure you have the right—” _

“Can you please just open the door?”

They paused. I heard an even quieter voice, piping up from some other room inside the house.

_ “Some Jehovah's Witness crap, I’m guessing. Leave it alone, Bri.” _

_ “No, he sounds familiar. I just don’t know if—” _

_ “Well, then open the door! Do  _ something.  _ You’re killing me here.” _

The person sighed and I heard the sound of a latch being undone. The door opened to reveal a tall, muscular man with a patchy blond beard and a tiny rectangular scar on the side of his neck. His eyes widened.

“Masquerade.”

I felt two streams of tears collect at my chin, and I didn’t bother wiping them away. I almost smiled, but for some reason I just couldn’t.

“You remember,” I breathed. Birthday looked more shocked than happy, which I could forgive. I raised a hand to touch him, just to make sure he was really there, but I didn’t even know where to place it. I only stared while he awkwardly looked away. He opened his mouth multiple times to talk, and every time seemed to be at a loss for words. Eventually, he slowly pushed down my hand like he was afraid of what I might do next.

“Uh. Hi, buddy,” he started with. “I…hope you don’t have any weapons on you.” He laughed nervously, and I tilted my head.

“Why wouldn’t I?”

His face fell. “…don’t tell me you’re still with  _ them. _ Are there more here? Were you followed?”

“Our family, you mean? No. Everyone else is at some new base, and I’m not going back until I can make the Elder leave us alone. I have so many questions, I…” I stopped at the heartbroken look on his face. “Are you okay, Birthday?”

His hand started to shake at that name. “Oh. Oh, no, they…Masquerade, I’m sorry.”

“What could you be sorry for? I’ve been looking for you for such a long time, and now we’re finally—”

“My name isn’t  _ Birthday _ , man.”

He said that like it pained him to even hear the word. Something inside me froze. I felt really bad. I couldn’t tell what it was, but somehow I knew things would only go downhill from here.

“What…what do you mean?” I almost laughed. “Of course it is. You remember me, right? You knew my name, you know that we’re brothers—”

“No.”

Birthday was starting to look angry now. Not at me, but at something else. His eyes read horror, it seemed that this was the last thing he expected or wanted at his door. I took a step forward.

_ “No? _ How can you just…what, do you think I’m some sort of imposter?”

“Your name is  _ not  _ Masquerade, and those people are not our family. I know that much. I…” He looked back and scratched his chin. “I know it’s hard to take in, but just listen to me. That crazy woman, she tricked us. All of us. She sent people out to drag us away from our real families, slapped some other name onto each new person and she used us for her sick little game. I don’t even know why she did it. Maybe she’s just completely insane. But Masquie…” he looked back to me with curiosity. “No. I never even learned your real name, did I. What is it, Matthew? Mark? Something like that. She always made it close to—”

“Then what’s  _ your _ real name.”

He paused. “What?”

“What’s your real name, huh? If you’re so sure.” I reached for my belt instinctively, not even asking myself why. He furrowed his eyebrows, almost pitifully.

“My name is Brian Sampson. I'm not  _ Birthday, _ and I never was. The Elder toys with everyone she comes into contact with. She used her weird eyes on us, made us wear those mind-controlling bow ties…just think about it for a second, it’ll all start to make sense.” He reached out as if to pat my shoulder, but hesitated and then let his arm fall. I felt my throat contract and my breaths getting shallower by the second. “Brian” wove his fingers together nervously.

“H-hey. Listen, it’s going to be okay. You’re not with them anymore, it can’t…” He trailed off and narrowed his eyes. “You’re  _ not  _ with them anymore, right? Can you at least tell me that?”

“What do you mean by ‘not with them.’ Are you saying that I should just leave everyone behind, and forget about them?” I took a step forward, and he grabbed my shoulders and held me at arms’ length.

“Yes. That is  _ exactly  _ what you need to do. I-I don’t even think I should be talking to you right now, it brings too much back.” He sighed and wiped an eye, though I couldn’t see anything there. “I love you, man, and I want you to be safe. So you need to stay as far away from me as possible. That includes Anni, and Event, and…oh, and  _ especially  _ the Elder. Though I’m not sure how you’d even get to her, she’s rotting in jail right now. What was that you said about getting her to leave…?” He trailed off, seeing the outraged look on my face.

“That’s exactly what  _ he  _ told me to do,” I said through my teeth. “I don’t understand, you were supposed to be different, you—”

“Who’s ‘he’? Are you feeling alri—”

“You’re supposed to  _ remember!” _

“I do! And it’s hurting me, it’s hurting both of us. Please, just do it. For me. At least get therapy, start over. You’re still, what, in your early twenties?”

“You’re wrong.”

“Mas—ugh. Don’t make me keep calling you that, what’s your actual name?”

“I won’t tell you,” I said, my voice shaking. “I thought I could count on you, and now—y-you really think—they caught you in their little trap again. Those imposters, they made you think these things, they’re no better than her—”

“They didn’t  _ make  _ me think anything, they helped me! Helped me recover from all the shit I went through, living underground, having a tracker implanted in me for a third of my life, being hypnotized into thinking I was part of some weird, misfit family. I’ve been trying to be happy for years now, and you’re telling me it was all for nothing?”

“I’m—”

“Masquerade, or  _ whatever _ your name is, you don’t know half of what you’re talking about. Do you think I wanted to accept that I was being fed lies? Of course not! But I had to, in order to get better. Maybe when every single person you come across tells you the same thing, it might just be true. You have to leave.” He looked me dead in the eyes with a mixture of anger and distress and pointed down the street.

“If you won’t listen to reason, at least admit to yourself that standing here and arguing with me isn’t doing a whole lot of good for you.”

“Sweetie, who are you talking to? Why are…”

A short, old lady shuffled to the doorway, much to both of our dismay. She took one look at me and raised an eyebrow.

“Well, hello there, young man. You know Brian?”

Something in me snapped at seeing who I assumed to be Birthday’s mother standing beside him right now. I adjusted my mask and looked past them both.

“How many other people are in this house?”

Birthday leaned forward like he was prepared to fight me off. “Why would you wa—”

“Only his sister. Would you like to meet her?” the lady replied, oblivious to the situation. I smiled politely and unclipped my pliers from my belt.

“Of course. In fact, I’d like to meet all of you, right here and right now.”

[JEFF]

While Max was off doing  _ something,  _ I was waiting at the edge of the woods because he told me so. It was one of the stupidest ideas I’d ever heard, but I figured I owed it to him. I sat behind a tree, facing the path that led to our old hideout. It had been too long since we visited here and for the sake of our lives I needed it to stay that way.

After what must have been ten minutes, I heard a soft buzzing sound in my ear. It eventually grew louder, and I stood up, groaning.  _ What the hell? _

**Hey. It took a little bit, but I found him.**

I jumped at Ben’s voice in my head, looked around, and walked just a little bit deeper into the forest.

_ Why do you say  _ that?

“I had to do something else first. I must have gone all the way across the state if I can’t even get to…nevermind. What’s important now is that I’ve got it.”

He was floating right across from me, thankfully not in sight of anybody that could pass by. He had a tiny slip of paper between his fingers and was holding it just out of my reach. I folded my arms, now realizing that I should have expected this.

“Fine. What do you want.”

“It’s not about me this time. It’s your boyfriend.”

“He’s not my—” I protested, but stopped at the look in Ben’s eye. He raised an eyebrow and tapped his head, in an annoyingly  _ are you sure about that  _ manner. My face grew warm, and I wondered exactly which memories he was able to see right now. Finally, I gave in.

“…whatever. My  _ boyfriend.  _ Go on.”

“He’s really not okay, is he? I saw what happened to him all those years ago. You know, I had the chance to protect the person I loved practically thrown at me, and I never took it. So you need to promise that you’ll take care of him if  _ and when  _ he freaks out.”

“Wait, if and when? What do you mean, what’s going to happen? And can I  _ please _ have that?” I swiped at his hand, trying to grab the piece of paper, but he just held it even higher.

“Promise?”

I reluctantly held my hand out. “Fine. I promise.”

He quickly gave me the slip and folded my fingers over it, like it was sacred. It might as well have been, anyway. “The guy Max is talking to right now…whatever you hear, I want you to know that he  _ does  _ remember. He’s just changed. I have to go.”

“Uh, okay? I’m not sure—”

“You’ll find out soon enough. Bye, Jeff.”

“…so long.”

Ben was out in a flash.

I heard brisk footsteps coming my way, and stuffed the home address of Liu Hodek into my pocket as I made my way over to meet Max.


	49. Chapter 49

Except he walked right past me.

“Max?” I followed him, not bothering to check behind me for any details. I saw his hands were dripping with…something _._ It became too dark in the woods to see what it was. I’d managed to get a glimpse of his face before he so rudely cut ahead, and he was _pissed_.

“Max, what’s going on? Are you…”

I was interrupted by him stopping in his tracks, like he wanted to tell me, but as quick as he stopped he started up again. I'd never seen him walk this fast in my life. He seemed mechanic, almost. I struggled to keep up, constantly tripping over roots and fallen branches that he'd simply kick aside and leave in his wake.

“Okay. I won’t lie, it's kind of funny seeing you this mad. But what the actual hell happened back there.” I furrowed my eyebrows as I came to a not-so-good-for-us conclusion. “You didn't get _caught_ , did you? Because that would make this the second time we've been forced to leave here, specifically, and I swear to go—”

“Brian? _Brian?_ And he didn't even keep his own name. They fucking killed—”

He was cut off as I yanked both of us to a stop and gripped his shoulders. “Max. What _happened._ ”

I expected him to calm down, or shrink, but there was some kind of black fire in his eyes. His face was contorted in fury, and I almost stepped back in surprise. But instead, I glared and held him tighter.

“Tell me. Now.”

He wasted no time.

“He didn't remember. He didn’t believe me. He looked at me like I was crazy, they _killed_ him, I know it. They brainwashed him again. It took me five fucking years to find him and now he's dead. I can't do this anymore. I won't do this anymore. I have nobody. They killed my—”

I grabbed the collar of his shirt and pulled him into a last-resort kiss. _God, he finally shut up._ I found myself wrapping my arms around him in a close embrace, rendering him nearly immobile. _You’d better not do anything stupid right now._ I almost started digging my nails into his back when he angrily pushed me away.

I raised my eyebrows. “Wow. If that won’t shut you up, you must be pretty mad.”

“You don’t understand, Hodek,” he said, breathing heavily. The color was fading from his face, and his mouth slowly formed a pained grin. “I don’t even know if _I_ understand. But I feel something. It—I don’t know why, but…I feel like I’m going to stab myself in the chest. Do you know what that’s like? Have you felt this pain before in your entire, glorious fucking _life?”_ He let out a hiccup of a laugh, making me take a step back. _This is new._

“I sure know I haven't. Not like this.”

I glared at him and sighed. _And this is_ not _how things should go._ “Okay. First of all, do you even _know_ anything about me, or was that a rhetorical question. Second, I'm the only one who gets to do the insane grin thing.” I sharply gestured to my mouth as if to prove my point.

“So take a breath and tell me again: what the _fuck_ happened back there. Who did you kill.” I paused and furrowed my eyebrows as I remembered something he said. “And who's Brian? You’d better have a good explanation, or I might have to rethink this whole ‘partner’ thing.”

I looked him directly in the eyes after that pretty much empty threat. They were glazed over, like he was looking at something in front of me. Or looking _through_ me. His grin started to fade, like he was just now processing my words. I could almost hear the gears in his brain at work. I could hear everything said within the past 5 minutes muffled in his head. I felt like if I concentrated enough, I could see through his eyes exactly what happened to make him like this.

I shook myself of that thought. _Nope. Not today._

“My brother,” he finally muttered.

My eyes snapped up to meet his again. “Your brother is named _Brian?_ I thought—”

“He’s not named that,” Max growled, clenching his fists tightly. I could hear his nails digging into the fabric of his sleeves, threads snapping under the pressure.

_Of course. More cultists. Can I ever catch a break?_

“They turned him again. They made him forget who he was, he forgot who _I_ was. He must have. Otherwise he would’ve listened to me. He…” his voice broke slightly, and his gaze started to lose its fogginess.

“He had to be set free.”

“…you killed him.”

I heard him hold back a laugh. “And you have a problem with that? What happened to the infamous Jeff Hodek, who didn’t give a fuck who lives and who dies?”

“Yeah, normally I wouldn’t care, but you were _seen_.” I glared right back at him, grabbing his shoulders. “And right now, I’m not sure you understand what that means.”

Surprisingly, he didn’t flinch. “Oh, I know exactly what it means. And I took care of the witnesses. They _were_ the ones who ruined Birthday, after all.”

For some reason, I felt something shake me at those words, and my mouth began to twitch. _So this guy’s other name was Birthday? Explains a lot._

“Max, I don’t think you’re right in the head.”

“You’re saying that like it’s news.”

I let him finish that thought before knocking his lights out and carrying him back to our old home.

* * *

 As I came across the trapdoor for what I hoped would be the last time, I noticed he wasn’t breathing. At least, not normally. His breath was short, sporadic. It might have just been tiredness from the walking and…well, murder. But something in me, for whatever reason, was almost afraid of it. Like it was a sign of something worse coming down the line.

A thin layer of dust coating the floor flew into the air when I jumped down, making me cough and hold my nose. It was a wonder that nobody had moved in while we were away from this place. Nobody was there _now_ , at least. Max still lay limp, showing no life. It was to be expected. But everything suddenly seemed more silent, more calm than before. It felt isolating. It felt like the way things were before he showed up.

I got some cold water, still foggy from whatever shit it was contaminated with, and downed a whole glass before placing some more by his side. There was a burning sensation in my throat, and I realized exactly what was in it.

_You bitch._

I dumped Max’s glass out and decided that hydration could wait.

In the silence of everything, I thought it might be a good time to get Liu’s address to somewhere more secure than a sweater pocket. Sure, it was just in case, but…

It wasn’t there.

I’d dropped it somewhere while we were walking back here.

I felt tears well up in my eyes, and my heart began to race as I frantically checked myself up and down for any sign of the piece of paper. I couldn’t find it anywhere.

_My last shot to contact my brother. And it’s lost somewhere, buried in dirt and leaves on the forest floor._

He started to come to by then, groaning and weakly holding himself up with his hands. I put any other feelings of the moment aside and crouched down next to him. Taking a quick glance at his surroundings, he noticed that I was there, and collapsed straight into my arms. His face looked like it was being dragged down. His eyes were owlish, and his hands were shaking. _Yeah, that’s definitely blood._ I carefully wiped my eyes and gripped the back of his shirt to keep him from doing anything stupid.

_Take care of him._

“Max…I don’t think that Birthday guy is your brother anymore,” I said, only really believing half of it. Sure, they weren’t ever his family. But I couldn’t say that out loud now. _Who knows what that would do to his head._ “It’s time to face that.”

Max’s entire body started trembling, and I almost heard sentences rattling around in his brain before he finally spoke.

“Just because the Elder is in prison doesn’t mean I’ll stop looking for answers. God, she…she was _right_ , we never should have—”

I grabbed him by the arms and turned him toward me. “That’s not what I said. I meant that he’s not your family…Masquerade.” I gulped, and narrowed my eyes as much as I could. “If he was…he’d still call himself that weird name. He’d still believe whatever that Elder woman told him. But he doesn’t. And he’s dead, so it doesn’t even matter anymore.” He tried turning his face away, but I forced him to look me in the eyes.

“You can’t get hung up on _any_ of those people anymore. Not after five years. It’s time to let go.”

Two seconds didn’t even pass after I said that before Max fell onto my shoulder, motionless. No sobs. No noise. He just stayed there, his face buried. I took that as a sign of defeat and hugged him close, furrowing my eyebrows. _So this is what it’s like to_ really _feel sorry for someone._

“Do you have anything you wanna keep from here? Anything you can carry with you?”

He seemed to think, and slowly shook his head.

“Good. We can’t afford to take half this shit, anyway.”

“I’m sorry, Jeff.”

His voice was disarmingly weak. I paused. “…you called me…no. That doesn’t matter. What are you sorry for?”

He lifted his head, settled with laying on my lap, and looked me in the eyes. “ _You_ called me Masquerade. Why shouldn’t I pay you back?”

I processed this for a second, then slowly removed the mask from his face. He blinked a couple times, but didn’t object, for some reason. Over the course of a good minute, we just kind of…looked at each other. I could have sworn I knew what he was thinking:

_This is all I have left._

Strangely enough, I was thinking the same thing.

After a while I leaned down and kissed him. For real, this time. The bastard made my life so much harder and I loved him. He eventually sat up, holding my face with some kind of new gentleness and kissing me back. It felt almost like a _thank you_. Either way, I wasn’t about to complain. For the first time in years, I felt like I could really live with this. Like I could enjoy being in the same space as Max, talking, holding each other, maybe even a little killing. Though I had a weird feeling my murder days were coming to a close.

He wouldn’t just be my partner in crime. He’d be my partner for life. And for some reason, the thought of that gave me a strange sensation in my chest.

We pulled apart, and I was now leaning against the wall while Max lay on top of me, looking at me in what seemed to be a whole new light. I still wasn’t close to accustomed with how he looked without his mask; he was almost like a real person. He had real eyes, and eyebrows, and freckles, and…

As my eyes trailed down his face, I came across the X-shaped scar I gave him that very first night.

For a second, every single time I’d yelled at him, took my anger out on him, and acted like I didn’t feel _anything_ towards him came flying back to me. I looked him in the eye again, feeling something in the pit of my stomach.

Guilt. _Remorse_.

“I—”

I was about to tell him that I was sorry for everything I ever did when I remembered how the very same night we met, he invaded my home and stabbed me in the chest. He tilted his head curiously, and I groaned.

“…I can't believe you dragged me all the way back here just to kill some guy who used to be your brother. What kind of partner _are_ you?”

He gave me a tiny smile. “Yours.”

I suddenly remembered the outcome of our fight in the parking lot, and felt a strange heat flood my face. He looked at me funnily and went in for another kiss. I allowed it; besides, what else could I do?

After what was probably a minute but felt like forever, I paused and held him at arm’s length with a stern glare. “Don’t think I’ve forgotten that you kept me inside with a stab wound for days.”

“Aw, I was kind of hoping you would. I apologized, you know.”

“Yeah, _barely_. I hadn’t been that injured since…”

I suddenly remembered everything that had happened between Liu and I. All the playing when we were kids. The knowing looks when someone brought up pot in our teenage years. Inside jokes, and their origins which I couldn’t remember for the life of me. And our last fight.

I’d been bleeding like crazy that night. Stung like a bitch. I was about to collapse on the ground by the time I reached his door. I wasn’t sure if him slamming it shut in my face hurt more, or just numbed everything. I figured that was the moment I really became unhinged. But now I wasn’t able to figure anything. I just wanted the Liu I knew back.

_It doesn’t matter. You lost his address, you don’t have his phone number. You’re a hundred miles away from him. There’s no point in dwelling on the past; you saw what happened when Max got too attached._

Something in me wanted to rip my own heart out, right that second.

_Is this even comparable to anything_ he’s _been through?_

Before I could try anything stupid, he took me in his arms as if he was the one who’d been helping me all along. I came back to earth and realized I was shaking violently. I brushed it off, if not unconvincingly, scoffed and rested my head on his shoulder.

“Ha. Uh…not gonna lie. It does feel kind of nice to have a family again.” I tried blinking back another tear, to no avail, and didn’t pull away when Max softly placed a hand on the back of my neck, like he was trying to say: _Stay right here. Trust me, you need it._ And I couldn’t argue with that. So I only shifted closer to him. I could almost feel him smiling.

“Come on. Let’s get out of here. We’ll run away and live like _kings_.”

So that’s exactly what we did.


	50. Epilogue

Maximus, as he eventually went back to calling himself, sat on the ill-fitting chair, tapping his knees and keeping one ear open in case something interesting came on the radio. He knew Jeff was somewhere upstairs. Whatever he was doing was none of Max’s business, though he would have guessed that he was just looking out the window through the blinds. He got paranoid like that sometimes. It was nothing too bad, though with “the Elder’s future army” you could never be sure enough about when trouble would come around. Max understood. He looked to the wall on his right.

_ 39, was it? I forgot to add one yesterday. _

He dipped one of his fingers into a nearby jar of black paint and drew two more tally marks next to the already growing number. Soon it would be time to leave. He felt sobered by the realization; he was just starting to grow fond of this house. It had two floors, a kitchen, wide front hall and everything. Plus, the person who used to live there had been something of a doomsday survivalist, so the place was packed with all the essentials. Jeff had muttered something about a “fascist” and tore down a flag hung on the wall with a strange symbol on it. They burned it later that night to keep warm.

Max was snapped out of his thoughts by a distortion in the radio signal. Before he could grow too worried by it, a  _ good  _ waltz came on. For once. Cliché? Maybe. A classic? Absolutely. He tried sneaking a peek at the station’s number, but all that came up on the tiny screen was a message that read,  _ “You’re welcome.”  _ He chuckled.

_ Well, thank you. _

“Hey, Jeff,” he called.

After a few seconds, he heard a muffled “Yeah?” from the second floor.

Max turned up the radio’s volume by a couple notches. “I think you owe me a dance.”

Jeff paused, then leaned down the staircase with a confused yet exasperated look on his face. “Wait, isn’t this the one  _ everyone  _ knows? It’s…uh…god, I can’t remember the name.”

“‘Waltz of the Flowers’? Yeah, it is. Come on, nobody’s looking this time. It’ll just be us.”

Jeff scoffed and made his way down to Max, who actually wasn’t wearing that torn-up dress shirt of his. He’d donned something a lot more casual, a t-shirt and a loose denim jacket that he never really got around to buttoning. Blue  _ had _ always been his color, anyways. He smiled and took Jeff’s hands in his own. The other man raised an eyebrow. The scars near the corners of his mouth were fading from their usual crimson red; he hadn’t cut himself for years now.

“How many of these things did they teach you about when you were a kid?”

“Enough,” Max answered vaguely. He didn’t like to think of the Elder or his siblings much anymore. It hurt him in an odd way. “Enough so that I can do  _ this, _ ” he said, catching him in a dip with a self-assured look, “when the time is right.”

Jeff glared up at him, breaths shallowing. “You really just like scaring me, don’t you?”

“Yeah. It’s funny.” He tilted his head and brought both of them back to stand. “Aw, come on, you know I still love you.”

“Sap,” Jeff teased, leaning in and kissing him before he could say anything else. Not that there was much to say after that, anyway. They stayed there for some time, savoring each other’s familiarity in this stranger of a house. Eventually, Max broke it apart and said, “Now, are we actually going to dance, or what?”

The two walked to the front hall, still in one another’s arms, and carried on with the waltz as best they could. There were a couple of trips.  _ Many  _ mistakes. But that’s why it felt so perfect, to both of them. They laughed and hugged in the middle of it all, relieved that they could at least do this without the threat of life or death. Last year was far behind them.

The mask still lay, worn from the years, on a chair nearby. It had lost its bright blue and shifted to a more muted periwinkle color. Max carried it with him everywhere he went, always telling himself that one day, he would put it back on.

He hasn’t since.

_ One, two, three. _

_ One, two, three. _


End file.
